IRL

Pet Owners Share Which Rules Their Animals Have Forced On The Family

Sit. Stay. Roll over.... oh just forget it.

Oh the fur babies. They are our best buds. They are always there when we need them. They are the pieces that complete the home puzzle. But sometimes no matter how much training you put them through or no matter the gaggles of treats and toys you give them, there always seems to be that one or two behaviors they refuse to cease. There is always going to be some rule they insist on bending just cause. Just like any strong willed teenager, they will find a way to drive you crazy at least once and awhile.

Redditor u/dlordjr wanted animal families out there to discuss some behavior issues by asking.... What 'rule' has your pet instituted in your house that you now follow?What 'rule' has your pet instituted in your house that you now follow?


Polly wants an answer. NOW!

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If my parrot asks "what are you doing?" Anyone in the immediate vicinity must respond with what they're doing. He will throw a tantrum he doesn't get an answer. _texas_redd_

It's just a sneeze.... 

If I sneeze my cat will meow softly and walk over to me and pat me on my face until I pick him up and tell him don't worry it was only a sneeze. VelocityRAPTOR33

I've told this story before. I sneezed and noticed my cat made a weird meow sound and turned her head sideways and looked at me. A week or so later, it happened again. I thought it was pretty weird but ignored it. Then a couple of weeks later she was hacking up a hairball. I instinctively said, "Are you okay? Are you okay?" I then realized that her meow when I sneezed was in the same tone as my question had been. She was repeating the worried query. She was about 15 years old by this time and I'd had her since a kitten, so we'd had plenty of time to learn each other habits. TotalBS_1973

I hear you whispering!!

No whispering... ever. My pyr/berner mix will make a growling "woooo" sound from the other room if you whisper to someone else, or to yourself. If you continue to whisper..he will come out to admonish you in person. No secrets in my house. Xerowz

Look at ME! 

When she [my 14yr old grandma kitty] is constipated, she needs me to watch her poop. She'll do these real deep meows and won't stop til I follow her to the litter box where she sits in the middle and tries to poop. We keep eye contact the entire time. If I look away, she stops trying to poop and does the deep meows again. Her normal meows are very high pitched, so it's easy to tell when she's constipated. FloatfulClouds

Are you comfy?

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When I was a kid, my dog slept in the middle of my bed and I slept on the trundle. For four years. EfficientAirport

Rise and Shine! 

One of our cats likes to be the one to wake my stepdaughter up for school every morning. We have a routine, I get up and go to the bathroom, brush my teeth and hair and then go let Kiki into my SD room. She runs to her bed and lays down on top of her, nuzzles around for her face and nibbles on her eyebrows to wake her up. We have to do this every morning.

TrendyKiddy

Let me check my calendar....

My brother and mother wanted a dog. My father did not. So we got a dog. A wonderful rescue pup that is parts red heeler, kelpie and dingo.

Naturally there is no truer love than that of a grumpy man and the dog he said he didn't want. So everyday, at exactly 4pm, my dog lets my dad know that it's time for walkies. So off they trundle to the local dog park, where my dog has her little doggie play dates.

I have to wait to be picked up after my dog has her walk and play date with her other dog friends. My dog has a better social life than I do. PanzerBiscuit

It's Quiet Time! 

My BF and I have to pretty much shut up after 9pm or else my dog (who is trying to sleep) will groan really loud. We could be mid conversation or laughing and she will do it really loud. ohjeegolly

It's funny how seriously they take bedtime - my housemate's dog used to take himself to bed at 9pm sharp and deeply resented being carried back out to spend time with the family. aroyb

The Petting Space.... 

My cat has a Petting Space that is strangely close to her food. Oftentimes, if you try to pet her, she'll lead you to the Petting Space where she'll roll around, act all cute, ask to be combed, until she decides she's done. She'll then promptly go to her bowl and have a snack.

She'll also go over to the Petting Space on her own accord and meow quite loudly. That's her demanding to be petted so she can eat. tuba4lunch

You may lay now....

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My beagle must go to bed by 1030 and will stand at the stairs trying to tell us she's tired. If we don't listen, she goes to a room and lays on a bed and goes to sleep.

Also, my beagle understands about 80% of what I say. When it's time to go to bed, she waits until after I lay down, she stays off the bed and won't get on until she has permission. I literally have to say "you can lay down now." I didn't teach her this stuff. She just does it naturally. wyatteffnearp

Going in Phases.... 

My girlfriends dog has to be let out in the morning to go, and then again 45 minutes later to take a poop. She is incapable of doing them at the same time. AdeptAlfalfa

The Squawkers!

I must not put the light on in the middle of the night if I get up to use the toilet, the seagull sleeps in a basket, and gets annoyed if the light wakes him up, and he'll then squawk loudly until the light goes off thus risking waking the neighbors.

The upside of this is that unlike the wild seagulls who get up squawking as soon as the sun rises in the early morning, my seagull has also implemented his own rule that he does not get out of his basket or make a noise until i get up after the sun rises, which means that even if i stay in bed till noon, there is not a peep out of the seagull until then. BECKYISHERE

All Hail the Doxie!

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My dogs let me know when they want something. The dachshund started doing it and the others learned from him. When they're hungry or want to go outside for a wee, they'll come to my room and a) stare intensely (beagle), b) paw at my legs (mutt) or c) all of the above and also whine threateningly (doxie). The other two will give up if I ignore them, but the doxie will escalate until I do his bidding because that is how the dachshund do. burymeinpink

Mash Him! 

Our idiot cat, Potato, is a spoiled princess who won't eat her food unless someone picks her up and gently sets her in front of her bowl. My boyfriend encourages and enables this behavior to the point where now if you put food in her dish she won't even look at it unless she's carried over. whiskey_riverss

The Laws of Feline Love.... 

My mother's cat was having some health issues(all good now), so I usually stop in to her place nowadays in the afternoon if I have time, to check on her when my mom is working and feed her. The cat rules appear to be as follows:

  1. I must never go to the bathroom alone. The door must be open so she can anxiously watch and ascertain that I won't be swept away by that flushy toilet thing.
  2. My husband is the most wonderful of humans, and she must be given amble time to stare at him adoringly.
  3. When I feed her, I must move her dish and feed her by the front door. Everyone else may feed her where she usually eats, but not me, or she will go on a hunger strike. (I have no idea how this actually happened, it's just the way it is now!)
  4. This is not strictly enforced, but she'd prefer I wear the winter coat with the long strings with it so she can bat them around, even if it is springtime and much warmer now.

If I'm a good human I get the best of rewards... kitty kisses, which consist of pressing her nose up against mine, which IS the most adorable thing I may have ever experienced. Believe it or not, usually I'm a dog person, but this cat is pretty alright. :D lilyvale

No Pass Zone....

We call it "paying the toll." Our doxie will instantly steal your spot if you get up to go to the bathroom or something, and she won't move until you've sufficiently rubbed the belly. So to get your seat back you have to pay the toll! wishingthebathwater

His way or the Highway! 

If he doesn't get a drive in the car everyday - that's right a drive, not a walk - he sulks. If he knows he is definitely going for a drive he runs up and down like crazy and body slams you with all of his 55kg. It hurts but his excitement is also so unbelievably cute that you can't stop him.

If he gives you the 'sparkly eyes' you must chase him, call his name and clap loudly so he can run around like a speed demon. The clapping is mandatory. If there is cheese in the fridge and you open the fridge door he magically appears and you must give him some. There is a 'right' toy to play with that changes every day. You must try all 20 toys until you get the right one.

I'm not quite sure how I manage to have time to do anything else apart from following his rules but I wouldn't have it any other way. FabulousPainting

Bedtime Tetris... 

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I have to sleep with my back to my BF so the cat can snuggle into my hair while smelling BFs breath. colesnap

WAKE UP!!!!!!!

My cat kicks me out of my bed by 9 AM whenever I try to sleep in. On weekdays he prompts me to leave my bed by 7 AM so he can sleep in the bed. carbonthepolarbear

Mine does this too, except instead of purring he stays just out of reach while meowing incessantly. The moment I'm up they're either at the food dish or in the spot I just vacated. Ex_professo

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One time I made scrambled eggs and I gave my dog a quarter of an egg worth of it (it was just pure egg, no salt or pepper or anything else). Now every time I make scrambled eggs my dog just assumes he's getting some and guilts me if I don't. And I usually give in. chloe2120

REDDIT

"It wasn't me!"

There's not much you can do when the righteous fist of the law comes down on you. Call it a mix-up, or call it a mistake, if someone's pegged you at the scene of a crime there's not much you can do but trust the justice system to prove you innocent. However, that's a gamble, and just because you've been given a "not guilty" doesn't mean the effects won't follow you for the rest of your life.

Reddit user, u/danbrownskin, wanted to hear about the times when it wasn't you, seriously, it was someone else, when they asked:

Redditors who were once considered suspect of a crime they did not commit, what's it like being held under suspicion and how did it affect your life?

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