Professionals Reveal How TV and Movies Misrepresent Their Careers


One of my closest friends is a cannabis entrepreneur in Colorado. Recently I got to help her out packing orders. Somewhere around hour 7 with my fingers raw from work I sighed and went "UGH. TV lied to me. There is so much packing tape involved in being a drug dealer! Nobody told me about packing tape!"

TV and movies make it look like shady deals in the park and slowly riding around in Escalades with black-out window tinting. Turns out, nope! There aren't really a lot of scary thugs - she's a single mother, in fact. And shady deals? Ha. Not a chance. It's mostly the usual customer service stuff in a brightly lit and clean shop with a whole lot of admin, and so much packing tape. Would not recommend if you have skin that's sensitive to adhesives or oils - or a personality that's sensitive to being asked 458 rapid-fire questions.

Reddit user Wino 2009 asked:

How is your career misrepresented on tv or in movies?

So now you know serving the cannabis community doesn't look at all like it does in the movies, but you'd be surprised how many other careers Hollywood has totally lied to you about. Take a look.

Not That Kind Of Nanny

As the Nanny I'm not trying to seduce the husband and murder the wife.

- YepThats_a_Baby


I'm a stay at home dad so therefore I must be really stupid and inept. Wooops! Accidentally put the baby in the dryer again!

- SuperfluousFish



Science is not a montage of swirling chemicals in beakers and claiming "eureka!" and making brilliant new discoveries.

It's a lot of begging for money grant writing, doing some tedious stuff 100's to 1,000's of times, then spending ages processing your data and running your stats and usually going "hmmm... inconclusive."

- InannasPocket

Damn It, Larry! 

Nursing. TV shows make it look like adrenaline fueled "someone get the crash cart!" kind of work. When really it's tons of charting, taking granny to the bathroom and "GOD DAMN IT LARRY STOP DRINKING COKE AND TAKE YOUR INSULIN DO YOU WANT TO LOSE ANOTHER TOE?!?!"

- KungFu-Trash-Panda

Military Intel

There's no fancy technology for military intel. We use Microsoft office. I give briefings with power point. I send documents made in word and excel through outlook.

- Sumelar

Shat On By 3 Separate Humans

According to TV/movies I strap women down on beds on their backs and yell at them to push about 5 minutes after their waters broke dramatically. Also the baby looks about 3 months old, placentas aren't a thing and it's incredibly neat and tidy ...also less poop.

My record for being shat on in 1 shift is by 3 separate humans. To be fair 2 of them were newborns, but still. I've had every (female) bodily fluid on my body at some point in my job. Sweat, blood, tears, poop, pee, vomit, amniotic fluid. And then I go and eat lunch without blinking an eye.

- WrackspurtsNargles

Nothing Like Baywatch


Lifeguards don't wear sexy bathing suits and seductively put sun lotion on while not paying attention to the pool/beach. We don't look like bronze gods and goddesses and nobody is smiling the entire three hours they spend on stand in one sitting. We don't get paid 30 bucks an hour to sit on our @sses and do nothing all day.

We're sweaty messes that (most of the time) HAVE to wear our work uniforms over our mandatory one piece bathing suits. We also have to cashier, clean, do customer service and be good reps for our respective companies. We have to put up with sh*tty guests not listening and ignoring our whistle warnings who then want to fight us about it while we're busy watching our water.

And if we're not paying attention to the water while on stand, the manager can and WILL throw a mannequin in the water and if you don't react and grab it in thirty seconds you are more or less terminated. You have to be on point and paying attention the entire time or your negligence can be fatal.

- SlutForStabler

Can't Land The Plane

I'm an air traffic controller (no Breaking Bad jokes, please).

We are not trained at all on how to fly a plane. Zero. We can't tell someone how to land a plane if something goes wrong. I've never even ridden as a passenger on the model of most of the planes I spend all day talking to. Many controllers have never been in a cockpit, and I know a few who have never flown on a plane.

- ShttyMcFckface


There are no naked women showing up at the door when I deliver.

- AntiAbleism

Pilot Here

Pilot here

  1. It's not dramatic
  2. It's literally the safest goddamn thing on planet earth
  3. The co-pilot is usually just as qualified and experienced as the captain, and usually has captain experience from past airlines. Most choose to stay co-pilots if it can get them a better schedule or aircraft type. They both fly the plane and both know what they're doing.
  4. In the event of an emergency, we have no emotion. Just calmly execute the appropriate response procedures and divide our tasks

- Carpet_bomb_furries

Try It... 

I'm a construction superintendent who believes ALL fix-up shows are bogus. You and the wife (and your 3 kids, 2 cats and a dog) are NOT going to completely demo and remodel your kitchen during your one week vacation. Try it and there's going to be trouble.

- RonSwansonsOldMan

"Too Much" Meth


TV shows (like Chicago fire) portray paramedics as going from one exciting, life saving call to the next. In reality, most of our calls are for things like:

Elderly person fall from standing.

Intoxicated person passed out on bus bench.

Took "too much" meth.

Sore throat for 3 days. Already saw family doctor. But it still hurts so I decided to call 911.

Intoxicated person passed out in a park.

Nose bleed.

Homeless person wants a free ride somewhere warm and a free sandwich.

Intoxicated person passed out in McDonalds.

I've had chronic knee pain for 15 years. I have a prescription for narcotics, and the pain is no different than normal, but thought maybe it was time to go get it checked out again.

Took meth. Now everyone is following me and trying to kill me.

Took meth. Now I think I can fly, and I'm climbing buildings.

And then with the legalization of marijuana, there was a lot of "tried pot for the first time. I don't like how it makes me feel. Make it stop!" 😂

Anyway, of course you occasionally get a shooting/stabbing/ random trauma/MI/legit medical issue. But the job certainly isn't going from pulling people out of a burning building after cutting off their trapped limb, then running to someone who is skewered onto a fence, then someone who has an unexploded bomb in their abdomen, then right to a passenger train derailment, then finishing your shift delivering quadruplets in an elevator that you accessed through the roof hatch because it's stuck between floors.... (Though...I can't speak for everyone. SOME medics are black clouds... Haha)

- JigglyWiggly22

Therapists Have Boundaries

Anyone in TV or movies who plays a Social Worker, therapist, clinical counselor, counselor, or psychiatrist. There's like ALWAYS inappropriate boundaries. The movie 50/50 comes to mind but there are a ton of others.

I AM a Social Worker and we have to be very careful about dual relationships. We cannot hang out or go clubbing with our clients. We absolutely cannot sleep with them. We could lose our license and never be able to practice again. And we can get in trouble for breaking HIPAA and confidentiality if it's not an issue of safety, (harm to self, others, or the client is aware of someone who is being hurt).

I cringe when they show therapists acting inappropriately. The majority of us practice within our scope and have healthy, professional relationships with our clients. And if we're unsure we consult with our colleagues, supervisors or our code of ethics. And we do know that sleeping with a client is a HUGE no-no.

- DarkAngel522

Medical Ethics

The amount of medical ethics broken in some TV shows would get your licence suspended for sure.

You don't scream at uncooperative patients, you can just refer them to another doctor. You don't give them placebo pills just because they are being difficult and you most certainly do not obnoxiously talk about a patient in the hallway and the elevator of the hospital. Patient confidentiality is something I have never seen made a priority in medical dramas (at least in the few i have watched). There are obviously more little things that put me off and it just makes medical dramas difficult to watch, personally.

- ThaiMedStudent

Indiana Jones

Oh man. Indiana Jones goes ripping through temples, destroying artifacts. He's pretty much the exact opposite of an archaeologist.

- Indy_Anna

No Gangsters


Weed farming is not exciting at all. I don't have to deal with gangsters or get to do a bunch of whacky science to come up with my own special strain. At the end of the day it's just mixing nutrients and keeping track of temperatures and humidity levels. I do get to smoke a lot, so that's kind of real, but my tolerance is so high it doesn't really matter.

- ComplainyBusiness

Typing Notes, Zero Sex

As a TV doctor I'd be solving intense medical mysteries and having sex in the callrooms almost daily. Instead I'm typing notes, browsing Reddit, and having exactly zero sex.

- AceofspadesX1

1% Zen

Restoring antique furniture is 99% removing mold/ rust/ dirt/ rot/ being stabbed by hidden tacks and nails and 1% relaxed, zen polishing of a gorgeous tabletop.

- Nikki_9D

Security Guards

Security Guards aren't supercops.

Any guard STUPID enough to observe something suspicious and not call it in or walk around an empty dark building with a flashlight deserves what happens to him.

The whole watching TV instead of looking at cameras? That's accurate.

- BronzeVgametheories

Voice Teacher

Obviously all a voice teacher has to do is push on someone's stomach and they get 100% louder and better. Or if we can get them to close their eyes and just "get" the song, that works too.

In real life, I teach an instrument that neither I nor my student can see or touch, and I have to train micro movements in so they can shape sound with their goddamn face.

- Callmemara

An Angry Octopus


Any scene where there's service happening, they have time for full conversations, and only work on one dish at a time. All calm, and relaxed..

When chefs actually work the line, we look like an octopus. An angry octopus, who speaks in 4 word sentences. 4 words, 3 languages. "Where's my mise, cabron!?"

- instant_ramen_chef

Tortured Artist

I'm a painter and sculptor. When I'm depressed, anxious, and dealing with feelings of torment - creation STOPS DEAD IN ITS TRACKS. The tortured, brooding artist as the most prolific and creative being is such a complete lie. Yes, mental illness/disorders are super common in creative people, but that's not what triggers our urge to create, it usually just destroys it. Also, art takes a LOT of fucking time, work, and effort. I don't just pull out all my paints, whip my brush across my surface in a passionate fury, and voila there's a masterpiece. Making art is 30% making the art and 70% thinking about it.

- Powergorillasuit

Trashing The G Chord


Guitarist here. Their hands are usually doing something sooo different from the music that they are playing it's hilarious. Playing a whaling zeppelin solo? Nope. Just trashing the G chord over and over again.

- Dantetheinfant

So what ridiculous ways is your job portrayed in the media?

Have you ever found yourself in an argument so stupid and/or pointless that you were sure you were being punked? Like you keep looking away from the other person to check your surroundings for places Ashton Kutcher and a camera crew could come popping out of?

You're not the only one.

u/Anti-hollowkid asked: What is the dumbest argument you've ever been in?

Brace yourselves, folks. Some of these arguments are breathtakingly bonkers. The sheer number of people who are willing to argue with someone over provable facts and what that other person likes or doesn't like is just ... stunning. It's stunning, you guys. Just not in a good way.

I Know What I Like


My wife and I once argued over whether or not I liked mustard on my hot dog. I was for me liking mustard, she was against me liking mustard.

The argument lasted way longer that you could ever imagine it would.

- AardvarkAndy

A Stair Step

My brother and I argued if our staircase had 13 or 14 steps, based on an argument about if the floor of the second floor counts as a stair-step or not. We still have no solution.

- RazerWolf04

My dad is a stairbuilder and I spent many summers working at his warehouse, so I can clear this up. 14.

- Apples9308


My husband and I have this thing where we only say "I love you" on Saturdays. Every other day it's "I love you, but only on Saturdays." I don't know how it started, but it's been going for 11 years now.

We're both shiftworkers, so sometimes we have to stop and think what day it actually is. We had an argument recently over whether it was Saturday or not. I said it was Saturday, he said it was Friday. It was Monday.

- FormalMango


I remember when I was about 13 my parents had an hour-long shouting match that ended with them almost getting divorced. The issue? Whether or not the nation of Iraq has a coastline.

My mother arguing that Iraq had a coastline, while my stepdad argued that it did not. This was back in 2004, and they are still quite happily married to this day. That incident is something they look back on and laugh about, and both of them admit it was really a pretty stupid thing to argue over.

- dontcryformegiratina


With an ex:

"I owe you $80 for the bills of ours that you pay, and you owe me $40 for the bills of ours that I paid. Here's $40 in cash; we're even."

She did not understand this.

I literally had to go get another $40 out of the ATM, and hand the $80 to her. Then I had her hand me the $40 she owed me.

"Now how much do you have in your hand?"

She still didn't understand.

She somehow has a college degree.

- Speedly

Mini Wheats

When we were kids my brother and I got in a physical fight because he said I like mini wheats and I insisted I didn't. His argument was that I always sang the mini wheats song and I was deeply offended that he wasn't aware that it was just stuck in my head but I hated the cereal. I actually did like the cereal I'm not sure why I was arguing with him about it but I remember how genuinely angry I was.

- shicole3



I'll tell you about the only legal trouble I've ever been in, the fight that got me arrested. It started over whether we should return a box of crayons or not, and to this day I don't have any idea how it escalated to the point of the cops being called, but they were and I was the one taken in.

- CorrectionalChard

That's Unfair

My boyfriend insisted that when two people are in an argument and one makes a point so reasonable and logical the other one can't disagree with it - it's unfair. I tried, logically and reasonably, to explain several times why that is just winning the argument, proving your point thoroughly and is completely fair.

His answer was that I was being unfair.

- ShyAcorn

Pure Masochism

How the ch in masochism is pronounced. My friend caught me saying "masoKism" while he would say "masoSYism."

To be fair, he grew up speaking French, in which the ch in masochism is pronounced in "his" way. But he insisted that I was the wrong one here and that was just infuriating.

- argofire

Emailing NASA

A woman was adamant that looking at the big solar eclipse on the television was unsafe unless you were wearing glasses. She wouldn't believe us and insisted on emailing NASA to check.

- derawin07

A Non-Standard Ruler? 

I worked for a company that made signs. We had a customer ask for signs that were 7mm wide that were to go on a door. Our sign makers figured the order meant inches because 7mm is pretty small, so made them 7 inches. I got a phone call from the customer who went mad at me for making them the wrong size. So I put a reorder through for 7 mm.

Argued with the sign makers over it but they eventually agreed to do it after I shown them the order in writing. I even had the customer put her complaint in writing, reiterating the size they wanted.

7mm signs went out and a day later I get the customer on the phone literally screaming at me.

Cue the dumb argument - we ended up having an argument over how big a millimetre is, and obviously everyone in the office were laughing, but this customer just wouldn't accept it and said we must be using a non-standard ruler to measure.

Ended up being escalating to the sales department manager who refused to issue a refund. We still don't know what they actually meant.

- Lovelocke

This Unusual Vegan Argument

Was in a pub with a few friends, and some random Dude dropped an ear, and somehow figured I'm vegan. Well, people like him are the reason I usually avoid mentioning it. He came up to me and insisted on starting a discussion about veganism. He claimed that by the end of it, I would be eating meat again.

He listed some stupid arguments, I told him I was not convinced and then tried to keep on drinking beer with my friends. He followed me, and wanted me to "try to convert him to a vegan." I stupidly listed some of my reasons thinking it would make him go away. He told me he still was not convinced, so I was like whatever. Again, I really just wanted to drink beer with my friends.

That dude followed me all night and expected me to try make him vegan. Doesn't matter what I said, and all the reasons that for me are obviously good enough to be vegan. He'd be just like "No, that doesn't convince me, therefore your argument and how you life is stupid."

Didn't matter how often I told him that I honestly don't care; 5 minutes later he would come up to me again "I'm still not vegan, so veganism is stupid, all your arguments were stupid, now give me a good reason to become vegan!" At one point, I was literally yelling at him that I don't give a single flying f about what he eats and why, that it's in no way my responsibility to "turn somebody vegan" and in no way his business what I eat.

Honestly, for that dude, I would have bought a whole ham, just to shove it up his stupid annoying face.

- onlytruebertos

Monty Python

In college my roommate and I argued about a line in Monty Python & the Holy Grail. The scene with the Black Knight where the line "Alright, we'll call it a draw" is uttered. We argued about who said that line, whether it was King Arthur or the Black Knight.

It went on for hours longer than it should have because I was stubborn and refused to admit I was wrong.

- Skrivus

Albert or Arnold


Whether Albert Einstein or Arnold Schwarzenegger would be more useful to have around during a Zombie apocalypse. How on earth would Albert Einstein come in handy!?

- Gerrard1995

Below Sea Level

I live on an island and when you go upland and you look out the sea looks like it's higher than or on the same level as the land. It's just a weird perspective thing because of the horizon. One day some kid says that it's because the island is under sea level.

I'm like wtf bro all of us would be with the fishes. He argues that no that's not true and if I just go upland I'll see. We then spend a good 5 minutes of my time arguing about it until I decided to leave this kid in his stupidity. He even said we shouldn't believe everything adults tell us and sometimes we need to think for ourselves.

This kid was older than me and was going to a good school. Lost my respect for him ever since then.

- -justforclout-


Someone tried to fight with me over how to spell my name.

Now, my name is in a lot of languages with slightly different spellings. I would have accepted any of those spellings, but this one was just... Not even close. It didn't make any logical sense.

An analogous example is if my name was Thomas and someone was insisting it was spelled Tomash. And not just the name Thomas in general, but that me specifically, on my birth certificate, was named Tomash. I know how to spell my own name.

I swear to god, it went on for like an hour.

- TK-DuVeraun

Whales Are Mammals

I was in an online chat room one day, and we were talking about whales. I commented on how whales are mammals and the next thing you know, someone was arguing with me and trying to convince me that a whale was a fish.

- kawaii_psycho451


Stupid microwaves. Having a man child talk down to me about how microwaves work only for him to google it and prove me right. He slept on the sofa that night.

- sun_phobic

Shower Schedule

My friend keeps telling me that the norm is that a person should shower once a week. This has been going on for years. I'm almost convinced he's trolling me.

- LibrarianGovernment

No Balloons For Grandma

My cousin and I argued over a balloon going to Heaven. We were at his big sisters prom send off and he let a balloon go and it went high into the sky.

He then said this balloon will go up past space and go to Heaven and reach grandma (God rest her soul). And I was like no it's not and it's probably not even gonna reach space. Releasing balloons is terrible for the environment and kills/harms so much wildlife.

He got really mad and defensive and started telling me to google it and do my research and I'm like I don't have to google it you idiot. He was mad at me for a good week.

- Dskee02

Spontaneous Dolphin Existence


How dolphins reproduced. It took me a few solid minutes of explaining to her that dolphins have reproductive organs and that they did not just pop into existence. The argument began with her saying she wanted to work with sea creatures.

Personally, I hope she was messing with me cause I lost a little faith in humanity that day.

- thebeststory

Male Chickens

I repeatedly had the argument with a friend over whether roosters were chickens. She was convinced that only the females were chickens (hens). We were 18 at the time.

- bee_zah

Lightning McQueen

Me and my friend were drinking underage, we ended up in an argument of whether lightning McQueen's eyes were blue or green. Somehow throughout the whole thing both of us never thought to straight up google a picture.

- 23071115

But ... Ice Floats

Waiter/Host here.

Woman wanted ice on the bottom of her drink.

Now read that sentence again and try to imagine arguing with that particular brand of stupid.

- FarWoods

Time Zones Exist

Coworker claimed that it was the same time of day and the same season on the whole globe. Had to get 4 coworkers to confirm to him that time zones do in fact exist.

- JustARegularToaster


My brother is colorblind. And he CONSTANTLY tries to correct me on what color things are.

"Hey could you hand me that red _____?"

"that's orange"

"no, it's red"



It is the base of our most common and heated arguments.

- droneb2hive

Andre 2000?


I'm late, but I saw this question and instantly remembered that I was booted from a Facebook group because I called someone out on a lie that was not only bull, but extremely pointless. She was friends with the moderator and they made the case that my argument over such a little lie was more of a problem than the lie itself (though they didn't refer to it as a lie.)

The woman said that she used to babysit for Andre 3000 and that his name was Andre 2000 - but he changed it after the year 2000 had passed. This was so easily disproven it was ridiculous. Their debut album came out in 1994 and he was already going by Andre 3000 at that time.

The argument wasn't a huge long drawn out thing, but the fact that either of us were on Facebook at separate times meant that the responses were over a long period of time so this argument lasted a few days.

It was stupid.

- P1ST0L_Wh1PP3D

Stars Like Our Sun

I was arguing with my grandpa about stars he didn't believe that there are other stars like our sun. Basically he thought there is only the sun, the moon and the earth.


Richard Nixon

I have a degree in history. I mostly focused on nationalism. Wrote a 50 page paper on it and Richard Nixon with around 50 100 sources. Looked at micro film for hours on end. Part of the paper focused on how Nixon being chair of the house committee of Unamerican Activities was used as a powerful weapon to use against political enemies. It also inspired Joe McCarthy. Have had people tell me I was wrong and Nixon was never elected to a position besides the president and Joe McCarthy came before Nixon. I stopped trying to talk history to people.

I also know quite a bit about the history of the Balkans its amazing how many Serbs refuse to believe Tito did anything wrong.

Wrote 100 page paper on nationalism in Israel. Its frustrating to talk about because for some reason a lot of people think Palestinian firing rockets randomly into Israel is ok but if Israel retaliates the people get up in arms over a targeted air strike that kills 3 people.


Balloon to Heaven

My cousin and I argued over a balloon going to Heaven. We were at his big sisters prom send off and he let a balloon go and it went high into the sky. He then said this balloon will go up past space and go to Heaven and reach grandma (God rest her soul). And I was like no it's not and it's probably not even gonna reach space.

And he got really mad and defensive and started telling me to google it and do my research and I'm like I don't have to google it you idiot. He was mad at me for a good week.


Binder Clips

I got into an argument with a co-worker over how we were attaching two pages of a letter together: small binder clips or paper clips.

He felt that paper clips would leave a "dent" in the paper when removed, but binder clips won't. He refused to staple them together. I felt that binder clips would also leave a "dent", so we might as well just use the paper clips.

It ended with him saying: "Do what you want [me], I don't care!" and storming off.



Once got accused of faking being Jewish. Why? I have no clue. We argued over the course of a month, any time I'd bring it up and she heard about it, she'd begin going after me for "faking it".

My mother's side is ethnically Jewish. Grandparents were practicing.




3 friends and I once got into an argument about how to pronounce Nutella. It lasted for about 3-4 months. It was hilarious how serious we took it, it'd get heated but never for real serious.

I think someone even called the company that made it to check, or that may have been for the Cheetos company. We were really bored in high school.


Lingerie Boxes

Late to the party, but there it is.

I'm a manager at a small store. We're only 4 working there, so my team and I grew very close and we joke around a lot. Once during a slow shift, my employee and I had an argument because we were looking at the lingerie boxes, and I thought that two specific boxes had the same woman on it, but she was 100% positive they weren't the same person.

Looking back, I don't know why it was such a big deal to us at the time, but we even called another employee who lives across the street to come and tell us what the heck was up with that. Turns out I was right, and she was pretty salty about it. It was a great night.


Wicked Witch of the West

I almost got into an argument with an old girlfriend over Glinda the good witch from Oz. She insisted that Glinda was manipulating Dorothy to assassinate the Wicked Witch of the West and convince the Wizard to leave to create a political void she could fill.

I conceded the issue when I heard the whole premise because I thought it was too damn stupid to get worked up over.


Keep Your Hands to Yourself

Just the other day I legit got in an argument with my co-workers on why I don't like my butt being grabbed by anyone (I'm a guy). Seriously.

They went on about "I don't mind it. Mike and I do it all the time and we don't care." Yeah, that's nice dude, but I'm not you, and there's something called "Keep your hands to yourself" (which was taught to a good portion of us growing up). Just like how Karen wouldn't like it if I touched her boobs or her grabbing your crotch or frankly ANY area you wouldn't like being grabbed, keep away. In general, you should not be touching me in any areas after I've told you not to several times before.

So unless you're sleeping me or dating me, keep your damn hands off my toosh.



My best friend and I argued over whether or not telekinesis was possible. Her argument was that humans don't yet know what the human brain at 100% usage was capable of, and that telekinesis was inside the possibilities.

I said the brain does use 100%, just at different times.

We didn't speak to each other for four days.



How dolphins reproduced and whether or not ghost existed (back to back with the same person). It took me a few solid minutes of explaining to her that dolphins have reproductive organs and that they did not just pop into existence (the argument began with her saying she wanted to work with sea creatures).

How it shifted to the existence of ghosts is a solid and reasonable question to ask (I don't remember why). I had to then proceed to tell her that ghost hunting TV shows do not constitute as undeniable evidence.

Personally, I hope she was messing with me cause I lost a little faith in humanity that day. This was in high school SO... hopefully she was kidding.


Dogs and Chocolate


I told this stupid woman that chocolate is toxic to dogs. She went on to tell me how a little bit will just make them hyper and then they will calm down. I told her to google it. Her and her bf shut right up. Now they have a kid. Good luck, Jeremy and Andrea. morons.

I should also add that this argument started because Jeremy was giving his tiny dog chocolate and I told him it was toxic.


Is water wet?

My roommate and I have a recurring argument over whether or not water is wet l, and whether or not a person is considered wet underwater.

For the record, it is no to both questions.


Mission Trip

A kid a church telling me about the mission trip I went on. Not only was I not on that trip, but I had never been on any mission trip. We were good friends, so it's not like he would've mistaken someone else for me.

He insisted I was there as if an entire week long trip would just fall out of my memory. He even had stories of things we'd done together. I'm not sure if he thought I was lying, joking, stupid, or crazy, but I was pretty sure he was some combination thereof.


Dragon Tales

One time I got into a shouting match with my mom and little brother in the car. The issue? The names of the two-headed dragon from the PBS kids afternoon show Dragon Tales. I swore it was Zack and Macie.

It was actually Zak and Wheezie. I don't even remember why we were yelling about it.


Green Or Yellow?

When I was about 15 or so my mother and I spent about 20-30 minutes arguing about the color of a shirt. We agreed it was blue/green, but to me it was just a shade more blue, while to her it was just a bit more green.

Turns out, your eyeballs yellow as you age and hers were 24 years yellower than mine, so I think that skewed her color vision.


Stars In Their Multitude


I once got in an argument over whether or not a line from the song "Stars" in Les Mis says "...but mine is the way of the lord" or "mine is the way of the law".

I didn't even really care what he thought but he was so adamant and cocky that it got me heated. By the end of it we were shouting at each other and I had to apologize, which I think is what he wanted the whole time.



My brother is colorblind. And he CONSTANTLY tries to correct me on what color things are.

"Hey could you hand me that red _____?" "that's orange" "no, it's red" "orange" "YOU CANT EVEN KNOW".

It is the base of our most common and heated arguments.


Hot Water

About five years ago, my girlfriend (now wife) once had a very intense argument about whether or not hot water cleaned things better than cold water.

She genuinely believed that water temperature didn't matter. This is someone who has not one, but two masters degrees.

We argued for something like 2 hours, and we seriously almost broke up over the whole thing.


Biology Class

I had an argument with a girl IN THE MIDDLE OF A BIOLOGY CLASS in high school about how humans are not mammals. She thought a human was a human and we are not mammals because "mammals are animals and humans are not animals"

I tried explaining to her the difference between reptiles and mammals and how humans fall under the mammal category to try and educate her... but she just wouldn't listen.

I still have no idea why the BIOLOGY teacher did not get involved...


Solid Or Liquid?

Some classmates and I got into a heated debate as to whether or not the human body could count as a soup, salad, or sandwich. The teacher got mad at us, but hey! All we were doing was watching a movie.

For the record, my logic lays with soup- Liquid contained within a solid, at a hot temperature.