Showing Nipples And Body Hair: Men And Women Share The Most Ridiculous Things That Society Only Accepts For Men
One time my mom and I were discussing bikini waxes. I wanted one but she didn't understand why I would want to "look like a child" and asked me "so if you shave everything, you would think it's ok for your boyfriend to shave everything?"
Then we had one of the most awkward conversations we've ever had. I had to explain to her that his hair down there was like a fuzzy, prickly mop that just dried up all my juices and itched me horribly, so he does shave down there for me. She said we must look like toddlers fooling around with each other. I told her this isn't the seventies anymore.
Wearing the same clothes.
Guys get to have 5 shirts and 2 pants and it's enough clothing for a month.
Speaking To A Group Of Older Men
My boyfriend loves going to the pub and chatting with the way older men.
Sometimes, I wish there was a public room full of tipsy older ladies I could chat to.
Sitting At a Bar Alone
I haven't seen it much and as a woman, I'm doing it right now and getting stares.
But sitting at a bar alone to drink.
Peeing inconspicuously anywhere they want without either having the piss drop down their thighs or popping a squat.
Do you guys understand how lucky you are that you don't necessarily need toilet paper or have to wiping after a piss?
Why Is That?
Facial hair. Lots of women have facial hair and it's seen as unacceptable.
Publicly roasting their friends.
If a woman is wearing a questionable shirt her friends will probably say "oh, that's cute".
If a guy shows up to a gathering wearing a porkpie hat you know damn well his friends are going to clown on him.
Going Shirtless In Public.
Although, I think I speak on behalf of all men when I say, "Women, we don't mind. Go for it."
No Pressure To Have Children
As soon as I settled into my career, my extended family have gotten into wondering when I'm going to be popping out babies. Like they even legitimately skipped asking about where my husband is. They just want me to make babies.
Like... I'm single, new to this career, just trying to pay off my loans, and the notion that babies are not on the forefront of my mind baffles them. It seems like this notion that I'm just...expected to be a mother and the primary caretaker at some point might affect me negatively in the workforce too.
Not Being Respected For Their Level Of Education And Career
So my partner and I have literally the same masters degree. But when people talk about something in our field, they always want to know his opinion and don't even bother asking me.
Not sure if this is a general thing though, it's just one of my pet peeves.
Not Expected To Be The Caretaker
My older sister has her Masters in Human Resources. She has 18 years of experience in the field and also handles payroll for the company she works for.
The guys at her job expected her to make coffee and handle all incoming calls. She told them, "I'm not a secretary nor am I a barista." They proceeded to ostracize her. It continues till this day and she has no idea what to do.
It's harder for women to be serious without someone thinking that they are being rude or unreasonable. I flat out wish I could walk into her office and give them a piece of my mind.
Not Being Pressured To Look Good
Not worrying about an appearance.
Like if I'm lazy, I'll roll out of bed in the gym shorts and t-shirt I wore to sleep, grab my keys and wallet, and go right to my car to get shopping done.
Most girls I know would be mortified to do that. There's so much pressure to look pretty.
Having 'Resting Rude Face'
Being calm, direct, and serious in nature. I try to be as professional as possible but many people think I'm a stuck up because I don't smile excessively and talk a lot.
Enjoying Sports And Video Games
I am a woman who enjoys sports and video games. My husband couldn't care less about sports. I won an authentic football jersey in a raffle, got a cool display frame for it, and hung it in my office.
Yet every new person that visits the house is like "oh, wow your husband must be a huge fan if they own that," and I'm always like "nope, I am the fan and I won that in a raffle." Then they look at me like I have two heads.
Why can't women enjoy sports? Or video games? What's so wrong with that.
Interrupting Others While They Speak
Interrupting, especially in a business environment.
When I try to talk, men will start a sentence like they were speaking into silence.
Once, I interrupted a male coworker and the room would have been less hostile if I had murdered a toddler instead.
Walking Alone At Night
Walking home alone at night. I can't imagine being completely terrified every time I needed to take even just a short walk home.
Being Career Driven
Being more focused on their career than having a family and settling down.
When a woman does this, she's considered cold. When a man does it, he's ambitious.
Getting A Vasectomy Vs. Getting Your Tubes Tied
Getting the snip. For men, they just walk into the doctor's office, lay down on a table, and within ten minutes they're done. Sterile and still firing and often no questions about their decisions.
For women, it's a huge battle (ESPECIALLY when you're younger) and often impossible. You'll be told that you're too young to do this, that your mind will change as you age.
And IF you somehow jump through all the hoops and the courts don't rule you down, it means thousands of dollars out of your pocket to go to the hospital.
(Honestly, I don't even care about the cost, I just want a free choice to do what I want with my body.)
Doing The Bare Minimum In Raising Children
Not participating as much in raising their kids. If my husband watches our son for 2 hours while I go out for dinner once a month, he's the world's greatest dad. The standard is so low it should be offensive to men.
We went out to eat once and my husband finished up while I attended to our son. He then offered to take our son to the car while I finished. Our waitress came back and actually said to me, "You're so lucky to have a man watch _your _baby." We both wear wedding bands and the kid's ginger as they come - pretty obviously ours.
I'm also the one who gets the blame for anything people perceive to be "wrong" about our parenting. My husband is absolved.
We All Pass Gas
I fart around my fiancee constantly, but yesterday I thought I heard her fart and was absolutely aghast. So that, I guess.
I am aware it happens. I am aware that women do it. But after 5 years of never hearing it, it was pretty shocking.
Freedom To Be Immature And Carefree
The freedom to not care about certain things (cleanliness, other poeple having a good time) with no social repercussions. There have been many things I couldn't do because, as a woman, I was supposed to "know better" and "be the grown up." The freedom to get to be the immature one sometimes.
For example, in the past when my apartment has been a little messy and I have guests over, some people will make comments to me about how I could have cleaned up before they came over (FYI, these are not friends - these are usually older relatives, coworkers, acquaintances, etc.). But my now-husband, before we moved in and got married, had a pretty messy apartment and no one ever judged him for it.
Even now that we've lived together for a while, he'll try to reassure me that no one cares if our house is messy. This is because he doesn't realize that there are people who do and I will be the person blamed for it.
A similar thing happened with planning our wedding. It was assumed (mostly by relatives and older family friends) that the logistics, planning, and organization was all on me. If it was a success, congrats! Murder_kitty is now a successful, grown adult woman.
If anything is slightly off (and they WILL find something), then the entire blame would be completely on me because , "I should have known better." I tried explaining that we planned our wedding as partners and had equal say (we truly did), but these people didn't believe me.
I'm a female but my sweat glands in my underarms are overly large so even when I'm cold I'm sweating. I've tried all the deodorants and antiperspirants on the market and they just don't work.
My Doctor has told me that the only way to make it stop is to get botox injections. That's not very practical so I have to carefully choose my outfits every morning and buy certain fabrics that don't show sweat or won't stain after 2 wears. I also shower every day sometimes more than once and I'm very clean.
Women walking around with huge pit stains looks grosser than a guy walking around with them and it sucks.
Note: Comments have been edited for clarity.
Racism is an insidious, and unfortunately prevalent, force in all of our daily lives. Maybe we're on the receiving end of it, being treated differently and losing opportunities because of others' preconceived notions.
Or maybe we're on the other side of things. Even those who aren't actively racist or discriminatory still have to process the world through the filters of the things they've been told about people who are different.