Sleepwalkers Share Their Strangest Nighttime Misadventures
From barricading the bedroom door with furniture, to knocking on neighbor's door in the middle of the night and screaming at them, sleepwalkers share the strangest thing they've done while sleep.
[Source can be found at the end of the article]
I took ambient for a time to help with my insomnia. My ex found me eating a stick of butter in the middle of the night like a candy bar, paper and all. Turns out, I'd do a lot of gross sleep eating and it explained my sudden weight gain. I ate jam by the handful, I hate jam... I swallowed mayo right out if the jar.... We also think I ate the used vegetable oil out of the recycling can. I don't use sleep aids anymore.
I reported in with the watch commander on schedule, correctly, in uniform. After someone saw I was standing two watches a night and didn't recall the double logged one we realized three things:
Our watch security was terrible.
Sleepwalkers aren't allowed to serve in the armed forces.
I cooked myself some food at 3 am. Even made a pitcher of lemonade from powdered mix. I was a preteen at the time. My mom came out to find me plating my meal and tried to ask me what I was doing. She soon realized I was sleep walking, so she guided me to bed after I'd eaten. Told me the story the next day.
I've no idea what I did, as I live alone, but I woke up one morning with dirty feet and a few leaves in the bed. The worrying thing is I sleep naked, and my clothes were still hung up from the day before. So I was either very tidy with my sleep undressing, or I was wandering around the garden butt-naked.
When I was about 12, my mother found me kneeling at the bottom of the stairs in our house, elbows rested on the stairs, praying. I'd managed to walk down a flight of stairs, fast asleep and get into a prayer position and was muttering under my breath. Oddly though, we're not a religious family and have never really said prayers at all.
I stuffed and cooked a turkey, woke up sitting at the kitchen table when it was almost done cooking. My roommate woke up at 3am and I was basting it, he was pissed because it was his turkey and realized when he was talking to me that I was asleep so he just stayed up and made sure I didn't burn the house down.
He showed me videos he took after I woke up and he laughed that my stuffing and the turkey tasted better than what he would've made.
My boyfriend is a sleepwalker. He usually just unplugs his phone and carries the charger some place else. Always fun to find it in the morning in random places.
But my favourite was (and thank God I woke up to witness it!) when he sat himself up in the middle of the night and said, with a completely serious voice:
"I have no soul and no vegetables, but I do have a lot of dust. Thank you."
And then he immediately fell back asleep. I laughed for like 2 minutes straight, he didn't wake up. So I went back to sleep, told him in the morning and still won't let him forget about that particular night!
I was sleeping in a bed with my grandmother (I was spending the week with her, she's amazing. It was like a slumber party so don't make it sexual!) I sat straight up in the middle of the night. I woke her up to say, "There's somebody in the house."
She figured I was asleep still, so she guided me through each room of the house to prove to me that it was empty. I have no memory of any of this.
I had never been around people who sleepwalked before, but it runs in my wife's family. I was on vacation with her family and we were staying in a house in Portugal and her youngest niece sleepwalks all the time (but I didn't know this). One night I woke up in the middle of the night and I turned my head to the door and saw her standing there staring at me with these scary dead eyes and not moving. I was so freaked out I just turned my head into my pillow and waited until she went back to bed.
I once woke my grandparents during a visit for Thanksgiving by kicking their bedroom door open and screaming "I HAVE ALL THIS RAVIOLI AND NO WHERE TO PUT IT!"
I was butt-naked at the time and I'm pretty sure that's the first time my grandparents heard me yell like that.
About two nights ago, I got home from work all tired. I went to bed straightaway.
I woke up an hour later, 4am. I am wearing these pants from Guatemala that do not fit, I am shirtless, there is a trail of old unused socks leading to my bed from the drawer.
I must have taken off my shirt, put on the pants, and probably tried to put on some socks.
I used to sleepwalk ALL the time, and once I completely trashed my newly cleaned room because I had a dream that I was with the Avengers team and they somehow lost the Tesseract. I got really pissed and we looked all over the place for it before I eventually found it in a closet somewhere. I woke up with my bare mattress on top of me on the floor, all my books torn out of my bookshelves, everything thrown out of my closet, but laying in the middle of the chaos was a neatly folded sweatshirt that I assume was the thing sleeping me was looking for.
My bed was a bunk bed (the one for kids which have stairs). I slept on the bottom and my sister on the top. The weirdest one my mom told me was just around midnight I pee'd inside one of the stairs which had drawers inside them and just returning to bed.
The other one is the worst one for me. After a long day of sleeping on my own bed, I woke up on my uncles bed (no joke) for no reason at all. He told me that he was playing Runescape when all of a sudden I came in and just slept on the bed (which had no bedding). I woke up extremely cold since he left the air conditioner on. Later I found out he just slept at the sofa in the living room and that's about it.
I had a roommate who was a terrible sleep eater. He had to stop buying snacks for himself because he'd devour them all over night with no memory of it. One night I got up to use the bathroom to find him standing in the kitchen digging into a bag of chips, his head cocked at an angle and his eyes closed. He was in my way toward the bathroom, so I said his name to get his attention and he dropped the chips and started screaming in these short bursts like "AAH! AAH! AAAAAH!
I was prescribed ambien for 30 days to adjust my sleep patterns when transitioned from the night shift back to day shift.
Within a couple of nights of my first doses, my wife found me dancing my brains out in bed and in the living room to no music. It was all innocent fun until she found me cooking bacon on the stove using only tinfoil. I almost burnt the house down and have no recollection of anything before she snapped me out of it with the smoke alarm going off.
Needless to say I no longer take that stuff.
When I was a young lad, I once apparently, much to my mom's surprise, got out of bed, walked down to the kitchen, opened the fridge door and started looking for "friendships."
My mom must have been confused when she saw me open the fridge and say "I'm looking for friendships." I know I was confused when she told me about this.
This one time in middle school, a classmate was spending the night at my house. We slept in the living room, so we could watch movies until we passed out. I was on the couch and my classmate was on a mattress on the floor. The morning after our movie night, she told me that she woke up around 4AM to find me standing by her head, just looking down on her. Again, she was on the floor, so I can't even imagine how creepy this must have looked. She told me I just stood there, staring at her for about 30 seconds, then when it started getting scary she said "[my name], what are you doing?" which caused me to turn around and walk up the stairs. I woke up in my bed, and I remember being like "...didn't [friend] sleep here tonight? Was that yesterday? Wasn't I on the couch?" and when she told me what I did I felt like such a freak.
I sleepwalk a lot when I'm stressed out. Most of the time I don't get very far because I wake up trying to "escape" from wherever I'm dreaming I'm trapped. One night my friend was over and I had a nightmare that we were being gassed out of the room. I was yelling that we are going to die and got up and ran out of the room. She was woken up by my screams and followed me. I then woke up and went straight back to bed without explaining anything to her. She was terrified.
A few different ones. Once I woke up in my room, soaking wet and wrapped in a towel, the next day my parents asked why I was showering at 3am.
The other was when my dad asked if I had sleepwalked, and I said I had no idea. Apparently I had gotten out of bed, walked out the front door unlocked my car, opened my trunk, put my coat and a loaf of bread in it, left the trunk open, put the keys in the ignition and then went back to bed.
It's weird that I never have the slightest memory of sleep walking, and I think I still do to this day. But my significant other is such a heavy sleeper that she never notices. Sometimes things are just moved around when we wake up.
About a month ago I apparently climbed over my boyfriend, waking him up and then proceeded to move all of the furniture in his room in front of the door. When he asked me what I was doing I replied, barricading the door, Then got back in bed and went to sleep. He had to get up and move it all back at like 4 am. Another time I hid my socks in the bottom of his university bag and switched the games in his Xbox around, then unplugged the entire Xbox.
We had just moved into a new house in a new state and we brought along a friend of ours who was an interior designer to help us do some initial unpacking and organization of the house. Our first night in the house I sleepwalked out of my bed, into her room, and just stood looking out the window in the room she was sleeping in. She woke up and saw me and almost screamed before telling me Please, go to back to bed. I had no idea I had done anything other than sleep that night until breakfast that morning when she told me about it.
I stay away from scary movies because that's what triggers my sleepwalking. Took a few movies and stories from my brother to figure it out. When Paranormal Activity was fresh out in theaters I went to go see it. I got super scared, and then paranoid for a good two weeks. Some nights I'd wake up at 12 and not go back to sleep until 3 (which was the usual time the demon was active.)
There's a scene in the movie where the girlfriend put baby powder on the floor to track the footsteps or something. I haven't watched that movie since I saw it so I can't remember everything. But one morning I wake up to my mom throwing a fit because, low and behold there's baby powder all over the hallway that leads to my room with complementary foot steps going to my room.
I only ever recall sleep walking three times in my life. Two were just me waking up somewhere else in my house. One of those two times I was just super sick, so I don't even count that.
However, one time I got up, put on shoes, went downstairs, unlocked the front door, ran to the neighbors house and screamed my head off as I knocked on their door. This was at like 2 am. I woke up to them answering the door. "What's wrong?"
"...Why am I here?
My younger sister and I were both sleepwalkers when we shared a bunkbed from the ages to around 5 to 10 years old. Some incidents of peeing in wastepaper baskets and standing eerily by sleeping mother's bed. The worst one for me with regards to safety being almost letting myself out the front door half-naked. The worst for me with regards to general absurdity was waking up to my younger sister writing my name over and over on our bedroom wall. This explained some previous confusing situations where I had been blamed and punished for graffitiing my name on furniture, etc. in the house despite having no memory of doing so. The sneaky girl had practised writing my name in my handwriting so much that she was doing it in her sleep.
My brother sleepwalked when we were pre-teens/teens. Generally he would just sit up in bed and look around (we shared a room for about 2 years when we were having a house built.) One time, he fell asleep on the couch while I was watching tv. He stood up, walked to the computer on the other side of the room and tried to turn it on by hitting it on all sides. Unsuccessful, he walked back and sat back down on the couch before waking up.
When I sleep walk I commonly do the same thing: make a really nice sandwich, then leave it on the floor and go back to bed. But here are some of the strangest I've had over the past few years.
I had a bed headboard screwed to the wall, ripped it off and severely injured my wrist.
I put all of my furniture on my bed because I was convinced the room was flooding, and slept on top of my mirror.
I thought there was a rotting, decayed corpse laying in bed beside me, so I screamed at it for a while telling it to leave.
This only happens when I'm extremely stressed but if it starts happening again I'll have to see a doctor about it.
Breaking up is hard to do.
And when you get the law involved, it's even worse. But sometimes people don't need the law's help to make things overcomplicated, they just have a grand ole time making that happen themselves.
People on the front lines of human cruelty include divorce lawyers. These are their stories.