People Share How Their Marriage Pacts Actually Panned Out.
Finding "the one" is becoming increasing more difficult, especially in this day and age with apps like Tinder and a somewhat dysfunctional dating/hookup culture. The following AskReddit users saved the stress and simply followed through on childhood/adolescent pact to marry someone from their past. Screw having to get to know someone from scratch. As these couple's prove, it's not always about love but sharing a genuine companionship as well.
Source list available at the end.
Not exactly a funny story, but one of my cousins had a marriage pact with a girl he dated in high school. He went to college and moved, but a year later, she moved out to marry him. It wasn't really for love, she had a degenerative nerve disease, and he had excellent insurance. They got married, and he took care of her until she died. I don't think they were ever romantic during their marriage. It was just something he could do for someone he was close to.
Anyone remember Google Mystery Missions from years ago?
If not, Mystery Missions was a site where you'd put in a request and other people had to fulfill that request. Each time you reloaded the page, you would get new ones to look through. I stumbled across hers looking for someone to talk to, this was about a decade ago, so we were both 14.
She was from Memphis while I was from Chicago. We instantly became best friends. For years, we talked every single day. Around 17/18, we made a marriage pact. If by 30, we were both still single, then we would marry each other. At this point, we knew we had strong feelings for each other, but the thought of being in the same place didn't seem possible at the time.
Since the pact, we lost touch here and there. It felt like a big piece of me was missing whenever that happened. We both had relationships that didn't work out. About 2 years ago, we started talking about being in a relationship and just being together. I met her for the first time about 18 months ago. We're engaged, and she found a new job in Chicago.
My wife and I dated during that awkward summer between high school and college, and then she went her way and I went mine. We sort of joked about such a thing. We didn't really say it. It was more of a "Wouldn't it be funny if... Yeah, you know what, that would work."
I think I saw her for lunch like one time when we were in our 20s. Anyway, ran into her again at a friend's party when I was 28, and we hit it off. She'd just gotten divorced after 2 years of marriage, and I was just back from law school. It was nice as we both knew the other wasn't a psychopath, and we more or less got along with each other's families. We also had many mutual friends.
Anyway, here we are almost 20 years after we ran into each other. We've been married for 16 years, have a couple of kids, and live in the suburbs. It's all good.
I had a really close friend in high school who was a social butterfly, and for whatever reason, she liked to hang out with awkward nerds like me. One day, she suggested a marriage pact if we were both still single by 35. I agreed with a laugh because, honestly, I didn't even expect her to remember who I was among all of her other friends, and there was no way she'd still be single by then.
After graduation, her family moved to the other side of the country. I figured I'd just be another Facebook friend, but we stayed in touch and actually started talking more. I'm talking constant Skype webcam and phone calls way too late into the night. Turns out, I was one of the few people that actually bothered to put anything into continuing a relationship with her, and about a year after graduation, she confessed she had fallen in love with me.
That was 7 years ago. We're getting married in 29 days.
I joined my high school graduating class in Grade 11. It was a rural school, and most of the people there had been classmates their whole lives. Come graduation people were assigned partners for the graduation parade. I was assigned to a beautiful young lady, who had a boyfriend a grade below us, while I also had a girlfriend a grade below us. Some guys were ribbing me about my "assigned grad date" when another guy (who was usually very quiet) spoke up and boldly stated, "I'm going to marry her." Everyone kind of just chuckled, and we all headed to our next class. I was very impressed when I reconnected with my old classmates on Facebook years ago and saw that he did indeed marry her. They even have grandchildren.
Since Grade 6 my best friend and I had this running joke. Once we were both single... we'd give it a go. Why? Because we were probably going to end up getting married to each other anyway since she was the only person who'd ever put up with me and visa versa.
We got married last month after 5 years of dating.
My wife and I made a pact at 15. We led different lives after high school. I joined the Army, and she moved to California. Somehow, ten years after we had made that original pact, we ended up in the same area again and started dating. We rushed it by five years, but it was worth it.
We met on a computer bulletin board system when I was 21 and in college. We both had ambiguous handles and didn't know each other's gender at first. Once he figured out that I was a female, he automatically assumed that I was unattractive (I wasn't) because why else would I be hanging out on a BBS with a bunch of geeks. When I figured out that he was a male, I thought he was in his forties or something. I considered the age difference and decided I could still make it work. Turns out, he was actually like 14. I definitely couldn't make that work.
This was awfully inconvenient because we were falling in love. I finally agreed to marry him if I was still single at 60. He eventually talked me down to 40. We tried to date other people, but we would always end up disappointing them because we were both in love with someone else. We talked pretty much everyday, and it was usually via internet chat. Most of our relationship was long distance because we lived in different states/countries.
We got married when I was 29 and he was 23. It seemed a lot more respectable, and we've been married for 14 years now.
I made one about 10 years ago with a very close friend. We never dated, hooked up, or anything like that. We had just agreed that it would make the most sense in the long run if we both didn't find our soulmates on the way to his 30th. He was also a couple of years younger than me. I'm currently 30 and six and a half months pregnant with the love of my life- who is not the guy I made the deal with.
About 2 months ago, I met him and his girlfriend at the OB/GYN waiting room. I came for a regular pregnancy check, and they came for the pregnancy confirmation. We laughed because we didn't share the news with each other yet, and we never spoke about the pact with our partners. Now we're both waiting for our firstborns with different people while sharing pregnancy joys and stuff. In the end, everything turned out even better than what we could've expected.
I met my current girlfriend on World of Warcraft eleven years ago. I lived in Maryland, and she lived in Missouri. I told her one day, a long time ago, that Im going to marry you one day. Years went by, we communicated on and off. I didnt speak to her for an entire year (2015). I messaged her last February. Soon after, I moved to be with her (by July 2016).
Tonight, during the get-together we're having, Im getting on one knee and asking her to marry me.
We made a pact when I was 21 and he was 20. It was that if we were both still single, then we would get married when I was 40. We couldn't wait that long, and he asked me to marry him when I was 23. We've been married for just over 4 years now.
I think if you're seriously making a pact like this, then you both need to ask yourselves if the reasons why you're not getting married right now are good enough ones. In our case, they weren't.
My husband and I met on Ultima Online. It was just two kids playing video games, but we swapped email addresses, AOL instant messenger, and then Facebook in college. He always said we'd end up together. One day, I casually agreed.
I flew from SC to PA to visit him after graduating college. We started dating, got engaged, and married all within a year and a half. We never actually thought there would be a scenario in real life where we'd meet face-to-face, let alone end up together. We'll be married for 7 years this coming weekend.
When my fianc and I were just friends, we had the pact discussion. I think one of us said, "Let's make the marriage pact." The other said, "Okay, if we're not married by 30, let's keep looking for someone better than each other."
I don't remember who said what. All I know is that we're getting married in 6 months, and I just turned 30. Honestly, I'm not exactly sure what that says about us.
Two of my good friends are both homosexuals (a gay man and a lesbian woman). They both decided that if they didn't get into a serious relationship, then they would get married.
They have two wonderful kids together and are amazing people.
They are still looking for their ideal same-sex partner, but it's very clear how much they do love each other and care about their kids.
My boyfriend and I kind of made one in middle school. We agreed in Grade 7 that no matter what happened in high school or after we would stay friends. We dated through Grade 8 and the beginning of freshman year, but we broke up and didn't talk for almost 3 years. We started talking again, and after about 4 months, we were dating again. We're 2 years into our relationship, have a 7-month-old daughter, and are working on getting a place together.
I made this pact with my male best friend in high school. When we were about 20, he told me that even if he got married before 30, and I still wasn't married, he would divorce her for me (which I found to be an odd statement). We went our separate ways, and I didn't hear from him until I turned 31. By this time, he was married. However, I wasn't. We spent the day together before he asked me, "Remember our marriage pact?" He wanted to divorce his wife for me. I declined.
He and I were best friends from 15-20. Somewhere between those ages was when we made the pact. A week after that conversation was when he told me how he really felt about me and I declined. A month after, he brought this girl into my workplace, introduced her to me (He only just met her after he told me how he felt, which is why I didn't know who she was), and showed me the ring- explaining how they were engaged. They got married.
As it turns out, this was the same wife he wanted to leave for me when I heard from him again 10 years later. Yes, they did have two children, and yes, he is (or was) unhappy in his marriage. I have no clue if he's still married to her today. He lives a short walk away from where my parents live (I live 90 minutes away now), but I have no interest in seeing how he's doing. No, we were never romantically involved as I only saw him as my best friend.
I was 15 and he (my male best friend) was 21. He wasn't creepy, friend zoned, or anything like that. Just someone I could talk to about anything. I told him that by the time we were 25 and 31 we should get married.
After he joined the Army, we actually wound up getting married at 20 and 26. Eight and a half years later, we're still madly in love.
My wife and I met as teenagers in a Marilyn Manson chat room on AOL. We had a long distance relationship for a couple years in high school. I was in Iowa, and she was in Washington. We ended up meeting in real life, and we would take turns visiting each other. I applied for college out East, and she applied for schools in Des Moines. Shortly after my 18th birthday she dumped me.
We stayed in contact over the years, and we would often joke about a marriage pact if neither one of us got married by 30. Seven years ago, I looked her up on FB. She was single and living in Boston. I was in an unhappy relationship and still living in Des Moines. We just clicked again. It was just when we were teenagers, and we both realized it was meant to be.
Within a year, my wife relocated to West Des Moines, and we got an apartment together. We got married in 2013 and just celebrated our 4th wedding anniversary. Weve lived in Iowa, Maryland, and now California. She's my best friend, and I would do anything for her and move anywhere with her. I couldn't imagine my life with anyone else, and I'm so thankful that it all worked out. I'm looking forward to our future and spending the rest of our lives together.
Some people are just meant to be. They just have a connection and an understanding that's stronger than everything else. I whole-heartedly believe thats us.
I had this pact with my best friend. We dated at 15, broke up at 16, went through the whole dramatic first heartbreak bit, forgave one another, admitted that there were still feelings there, but we wanted to see what else life had to offer. So we made a promise that if we were both still single at 30, you know, we'd just call it and get married.
We dated other people, went to college, moved to other states, stopped talking for a while due to jealous partners, became friends again, and had one lousily drunken hookup but stayed close friends.
At the age of 25, we decided waiting 5 more years was a giant waste of time. We were already best friends, in love, and got along very well. We both had our fair share of ridiculous experiences and got everything out of our systems.
We are currently 27 and planning on getting married around 30 (just to somewhat stick to our original plan), and we're completely happy.
We married young and had two kids. We parent well together, and there's no one else I could handle day-long road trips with, but we really, really suck at marriage. We jokingly made a divorce pact for 2020 thinking that we'd both still be young enough to enjoy going out, and by then, we'd have the kids through their adolescent years. As it turns out, we only made it a year longer than our pact, and we're currently in the process of ending our marriage. There's no one else I'd rather peacefully work through all of this with though. Whether it's in 2020 or now.
I had my first teenage love at the ripe age of 16. We dated for 2 years, we learned a lot, and we quickly matured. We loved each other so much.
Then the good/bad news happened. Senior year, we applied to the same schools. She got into UCLA and I didn't, but I got into NYU and she didn't. We were so torn. I remember both of us being so happy that we got into such great schools, but we also realized that we would be apart.
We cried so much that day. I'll never forget it. We were inseparable, and we tried to talk and reason things out. We called, texted, and set up Skype dates. I think we both knew in the back of our mind, though, that we needed to be single for the next chapter in our lives.
This was our biggest heartbreak. I remember her crying on my shoulder in my room. I was holding back tears. I told her that everything was going to be alright and that we would still keep in touch. I remember my main goal was for her to feel better.
One day while we were eating ice cream at our favorite spot under a big willow tree, I told her that we should be single as we start on these new chapters. We both agreed even though it was so hard for us. I let her know this was to protect the both of us from temptation, and I didn't want to hold her back from partying and experience college. She let me know that she also wanted the best for me. I'll never forget that.
"Can you promise to never forget about me?"
"Of course, you're my one and only. The timing of our relationship is what is causing us to split."
"What if life gets in the way, and we go our separate ways? What if we find other people and drift apart?"
"It's possible, but I'll always remember you and try to keep in touch."
"Can you promise me that you'll reach out to me when I'm 25?"
"I'm going to set a calendar reminder right now, I promise."
As you can probably guess, the first year was tough. We kept in touch and still talked on a regular basis. I saw her on social media partying with new friends and I could only wish that I was there. Our busy student lives got in the way. One day, I saw her Facebook relationship status change to "In a Relationship with __". I felt like a truck had hit my chest. I cried that day like I've never cried. She had moved on and found someone else. Even though we were both single for a while, it sucked.
We still messaged here and there, but it was evident I was no longer a priority. I deleted all my social media accounts and moved on with my life.
Fast forward (7 years to this summer), I'd been through two relationships. I lived in the city now and was in my third-year of residency. I was studying at a cafe when my phone suddenly vibrated. I glanced over, and it was a calendar reminder. "Reach out to ___, she's 25 today." My heart fluttered, and my mind went insane. I had totally forgotten. It had been 7 years, and I had so many questions.
I started digging around and quickly found out that she had changed her number. I spent a solid hour thinking of what to say, only to type: "Happy 25th birthday :)"
A response came a couple of minutes later: "Hey thanks, who's this?"
After I revealed who I was and told her how I remembered to reach out to her on her 25th birthday, I found out that she had been living in NJ and was working as a paralegal while going to law school.
We made plans to meet up and catch up. It was like nothing had changed. She was still beautiful as ever, smart, and motivated. I found out that she was single and so was I.
I asked, "Why did you want me to reach out to you when you're 25? It was really random."
"Well, I was hoping that we would both be single by then and -" a waitress cut us off because we had stayed for 5 hours.
The rest is history.
Posts are edited for clarity.
Breaking up is hard to do.
And when you get the law involved, it's even worse. But sometimes people don't need the law's help to make things overcomplicated, they just have a grand ole time making that happen themselves.
People on the front lines of human cruelty include divorce lawyers. These are their stories.