People Share The Strangest Person They've Seen At The Gym.

Going to the gym, you can see some pretty weird stuff. A lot of it has to do with the gym equipment: some of it can be difficult to use, and without the proper technique you might look silly or actually get hurt. 

Reddit gym go-ers were asked about the funniest thing they'd ever seen at the gym. Here are their top answers.

Check out the source at the end of the article to read more!

Went to a smalltown gym once, place was completely empty save for a cute, blonde girl working at the reception area. I decided to do some leg squats in billion-dollar-man slo-mo style. This wasn't just any conventional squatting machine though, it required you to lay on your back and push the weights upwards. Anyhow, got on the machine and did a couple of motions, got up, loaded more weights on and repeated. This carried on until I clearly loaded on too much weight, but you cannot give up when trying to impress a girl, so I soldiered on. I got to about the third lift when I started heaving and making muffled groaning noises. Have to do one more lift! Lift, lift, LIFT dammit! And then it happened. A clear, unmistakable farting sound escaping and echoing in the very empty gym.

Got up, threw my towel over my shoulder and walked out. That gym never saw me ever again.


I was swimming backstroke once, and there was some random guy in my lane. He was just kind of chilling by the wall, and as I passed him, I accidentally cupped his balls. Extremely embarrassing, but I tried to play it off and didn't stop. When I finished the next lap, I did it again. I didn't stop swimming until he got out so I wouldn't have to face him.


A dude was running at full speed on a treadmill when he lost his footing, slipped, and the treadmill pretty much shot him right off of there. But where it really gets good is how he recovered. He was one one of the back treadmills that's just in front of the mats where people do ab workouts. He landed in such a way that he was pretty much laying perfectly on the mat. So instead of getting up, he just sort of started doing crunches like nothing even happened. So much win.


When I was a freshman in college I went to one of my school's athletic facilities by myself and had no idea how to get around. I was wandering around the area trying to find cardio machines when I noticed a room full of free stationary bikes and, though I was seeking a treadmill, decided that a bike would suffice. Within ten minutes all the bikes in the room were taken. And then an instructor came in. She asked me if I was part of her class (as I hadn't been there the last couple of weeks). I panicked and just said yes. Turns out I was in some advanced spin class. I literally couldn't walk back to my dorm afterwards, I had to sit in the locker room for an hour until I could really feel my legs.


I work out at a gym in a corporate office building. A decent percentage of the people who work there are foreigners. Most of them are late-in-life immigrants, so their assimilation to American culture is partial, at best.

Several of these guys follow the same workout pattern:

  1. Walk into gym in regular work clothes: dress slacks, button-down shirt, dress shoes, tie.

  2. Walk up to random station. Begin doing reps on station at whatever setting, equipment and weight is present. Make no changes to setting, equipment or weight.

  3. Do a random number of reps (1-30) based upon the present weight.

  4. Walk to another station, repeat.

No warmups, no stretching, no gym clothes, nothing. And even weirder: if they come in and everything is set wrong for them, they just leave and come back later.


I was doing chinups and thought people were impressed, since people were looking. Turns out I ripped my shorts and my underwear was freely exposed. On the plus side, mostly girls looking, and no giggles.


I was minding my own business doing free-weights when this huge red-headed viking comes and sits at the bench next to me, grabs the biggest weight there, and then looks at himself in the mirror and starts screaming "YOU'RE A WARRIOR" as he does his reps. I had to run out of the room so that I wouldn't laugh my butt off at him and get torn in two by his inevitable viking fury.


I was on the treadmill just getting up to my second mile straight, which is my warm down from the rest of my routine, and I suddenly knew I was about to be sick.

I jumped off the treadmill, leaving my stuff on it, and you know how you feel like you're moving really fast just after coming off a treadmill? Yeah I did, I went straight over on my back and projectile vomited right up in the air, and it came back down and landed on my face.

Luckily, it was really watery sick with no chunks, so it didn't take long to clean up.

But it was a bad day.


Witnessed a guy on a treadmill who decided to take off his sweatshirt whilst still running. Needless to say it did not end well for him, but it was hilarious for everyone else.


I saw some guy, who was supposed to be spotting for his buddy on the bench press, pull the bar back off of the uprights, after the person benching was clearly done with the set. The spotter was reaming out his friend for not being able to do anymore The person benching was fighting the spotter, trying to get the bar back on the uprights, so the spotter pushes the bar down, and continues to ream him out for not being able to get it off his chest. I was ready to go and help the benching guy right before the spotter finally lifts the bar off of his friend with one hand, acting all macho.

Later, the same guy (spotter) was doing some dumbbell bench presses with some 80lb dumbbells, and he made it a point to throw them as far forward as he could when he was done. My gym has plastered "DON'T DROP THE WEIGHTS" posters everywhere for people like this guy.

To top it all off, he was wearing a Monster energy drink beanie the entire time.


Oh I have so many of these stories! I worked at a gym for two years, and you see your fair share of stupid.

  1. My personal worst: I was attempting 40 lbs dumbbells on flat bench for the first time. My husband was watching football on the overhead tv instead of spotting me. My arm gave way mid rep and dumbbell smashes right on my face.

  2. Had to clean up several used condoms and a used douche from the restroom on several different occasions

  3. Had a guy ask me to spot him on the bench simply so he could look up my shorts. I had to give him props...didn't even see it coming.

  4. We had a tanning salon in the gym as well. Caught a couple having sex in a tanning bed. Found a random guy reading a comic in one of the tanning rooms after hours. Someone left an unpeeled banana on the tanning bed. Had to call the cops after finding an unresponsive female in a tanning bed. 


This very overweight guy starts coming in a green tshirt. Two years later he's wearing the same tshirt, it's now hanging off him like a curtain, and doing an intense workout, pistol squats, weighted pullups etc. Brofist.


Several years back a young and kind of attractive (some say) weather guy was a member at this fairly tiny gym. Anywho, my boyfriend and I are working out and when I go to get water I see him walk up to an employee (a very pretty, blonde, young lady) and says, word for word, "It's getting kinda hot in here, SEXY HOT!" and then proceeds to try to flirt with her as she awkwardly walks away. My boyfriend and I quote that all the time and used to laugh every time we saw his face on t.v.


Currently living in Korea and go down to my apartment's gym frequently.

The typical Korean gym regimen I get to see every day:

  1. Walk on the treadmill while holding the bar. If not holding bar, moving arms back and forth in a manner that most likely does nothing but make them look like a flight line marshaller.

  2. Cigarette

  3. Vibrating Belt Machine

  4. Vibrating Platform Calf Workout

Also, lots of judging looks to those who run on the treadmills.

It's one of a kind, for sure.


I worked at a YMCA gym for about a year, and this happened during my last week there. A young guy, about 16, came in as a guest of a member. Part of my job was to basically do laps around the gym to check on everything, and on one of my laps I see this guy has his shirt off. It's policy to keep shirts on, so I ask him to put it back on. He says okay. I lap again, and the shirt is still off. Ask him again to put it on, he says okay. I'm rounding lap 3 and now I see his pants are off, too. Mind you I'm a 19-year-old girl at the time, and I ask him to please get dressed, and he proceeds to tell me that I can't limit his freedom of expression or something. The boxers come off - the man is naked. I throw an exercise mat toward him, tell his friend to please contain this guy, and run to get my boss (also a petite woman). We run back and basically surround him holding exercise mats, acting sort of like censor bars. We're begging him to get dressed and he starts, I'm not kidding, doing karate moves, kicking and flailing around with his penis all everywhere. We eventually have his friend call his parents, he starts CRYING, and comes at my boss. At this point his friend takes him down and we call the police.


I used to work at a Gym in Fort McMurray (Northern Canada). At this gym we kept our dumbbells on the ground, in little groove latch things because our rack kept breaking. The problem with this is you can easily trip on the handles.

I'm also from England so I have a some-what pronounced accent. I was chatting up one of the women who came in, talking about her radio show. Some other guy came in, signed the sheet and left to do some warm-ups. He apparently was jealous that I was causing her to laugh and enjoy herself, while he couldn't.

He started to yell out "OI. YOU BRITISH IDIOT!" and got up and started to walk towards me. Remember what I said about the dumbbells? Yeah. He tripped over one, faceplanted on yoga/exercise ball and then broke his nose when he bounced off of that. He then promptly left everything behind and ran out. He never came back for his stuff either and after having it for 3 months my boss said I could have his iPod and laptop.

Another example was that in the same gym we had one room containing beds for suntanning. Then we also had a large, out in the open, stand up spray-tan booth. One woman rented it for 10 minutes, which I clocked in and she started it.

After 15 minutes passed, I noticed she was still in there. I knocked on the door. No answer. I knocked again and said that I'd have to come in if she didn't answer. No answer. I opened the door. She was masturbating. When she saw me she peed full stream, which scared her and me. She jumped, and I fell over. When she tried to leave she slipped on the pee and knocked herself out cold on the ground. The paramedics picked her up and carted her off.


I was on a treadmill once when my earbud cords got caught on something. My mp3 player was yanked onto the floor. I hopped off the treadmill to retrieve it and tried to hop back on. Instead, I was flung backwards and hit a wall. This all happened in front of a roomful of ripped muscleheads. It was really embarrassing, but it's a funny story now.

The worst part was that I hit the wall directly under a poster that depicted a group of slender, pretty women all smiling and working out together. The caption on the poster read, "Excercise is FUN!"


I once saw a guy come out of the locker room with a long piece of crap-stained toilet paper hanging from the waistband of his shorts. Since it was hanging from the back of his shorts he didn't notice it for the hour he was there. He was one of those people who had just started working out recently and mistook the glances from others as looks of admiration. Interestingly enough, he stopped to flex in front of the mirror in between every set. Poor guy.

That was me.



My friend told me that he once saw a guy wash plates under gym a shower.


I was at my college's gym about a week after I had transferred there and it was pretty empty. I was warming up on a bike and from across the room I saw a guy bench pressing with no spotter and being a pretty careful gymrat, I kept my eye on him. Minutes later he got tired and couldn't get the bar up on the rack. It ended up crashing on his chest and I could tell he wasn't able to get it off. His face turned red and looked to be in a good amount of pain. I ran over and lifted the bar off - and he's been one of my best friends ever since.


My class was at the gym and a lot of them weren't even trying to do anything. So I just got out my Ipod and went on a treadmill by myself. I'm running at a fairly high speed and then all of a sudden I fly forward, getting my body slammed on the controls smashing my head into a wall. So I go all woozy for a minute and when my head starts spinning; I realize what had happened. One of the guys had been talking to some girls on the exercise bikes behind me while getting a medicine ball. He put the medicine ball down on the ground and it got sucked under my treadmill firing me forward.


My worst happened yesterday. I was about to get out of the shower at my gym when I heard a baby cry and people yelling. Then a river of crap enveloped my drain and my escape. I guess their kid pooped himself and they thought it was a good idea to wash it down the drain with me downstream. All I could manage to do was huddle in the corner and sob "why....why....why..."


I over racked the bench press, and was struggling to do get even one rep in. I didn't lock the weights, and started slipping to one side. All the weight fell off one side, loudly, which caused the whole set to tip wildly to the other side, making all those weights fall off, again, loudly. Left with nothing but an empty bar, I did a couple reps, just to make sure people knew I was here to workout.


This dude who by the way, looks and dresses hilarious, was hovering around the stationary bicycle I was riding on. I saw his reflection and thought hey, he can wait. I just got on this. So here I am, minding my own business, listening to some awesome Nine Inch Nails on my in-ear earphones when suddenly I see him coming at me threateningly shaking his head and doing some sort of circular motion with his hands. I immediately got off the cycle in a state of alarm and stepped back. He suddenly takes a U turn and walks off. I'm left there wondering what the hell just happened?

I then removed my earphones to realize he was dancing to a really catchy Gaga tune. As a part of his aerobic workout.


I saw a guy bring in 5 huge 2L bottles of different juices. He had orange, peach, cranberry and I forgot the other two, but every time he switched weights he would carry them around. That is massive over kill.

Another small, skinny guy was about to do 90lb dumbbells with a seated overhead press. I asked the guy if he was sure he could handle it and he just gave me a nod of approval. His friend spots him and grabs his arms to make sure he fully lifts it, then I just see the guy's arm go all the way back and his shoulder dislocates.


My mother forced me to do spinning with her one night at the gym. The bike was one of the ones with the pedals that you slip and lock your feet into. One part of spinning is when you're forced to stand and pedal, enjoying the firey burn in your poor, little buttocks. Because I'm so light, the sheer force of me pedaling in the standing position caused me to rocket upwards. On a normal bike, I would have just fallen off, relatively unharmed. However, the fact that I had my feet buckled in meant that I was violently jerked back into reality, smashing my thigh and genitals onto the bike base. Obviously out of control of the situation, my legs kept pedaling, meaning that I continued on to forcibly knee myself in the face for a good 10-seconds. I ended up with several injuries, including a black eye and a bruise the size of texas on my right, inner thigh. The harm to my genitals was grim.


16 years old, first day working at an athletic club.

Work 10 hour double shift, exhausted, go into locker room.

See man collapsed lying naked on the floor.

Assume worst, rush up to him try and help since I'm first aid and cpr certified.

Tap man's feet, and nudge shoulder while shouting "ARE YOU OK SIR?!" as is protocol.

No response.

Because locker room is deserted, rush back to office to call 911

Return to old guy, check for signs of life.

Man abruptly clocks me in the jaw and rams my head into a locker.

Curses me out for bothering him while sleeping, says he is going straight to my manager and wants me fired.

Ambulance shows up, ends up taking me to the hospital to deal with my now broken jaw.

Boss comes to visit me after surgery.

Don't actually get fired for doing what I was trained to do and helping the guy.

Get fired for calling 911 in a non-emergency situation, even though the guy was playing coy with me when I checked for a response and I was following protocol.

Guy gets a free lifetime membership because of me inconveniencing him.


One time I was at the gym and this really beefed up bodybuilder was showing me how to do a certain workout. About 20 minutes later, I'm on one side of the gym and he's on the other side working with a partner. In the middle of my set he screams, "YOU FEEL IT?!?!" All pumped up, I scream back "YEAH!!"

He wasn't talking to me...


In highschool, watched a guy squatting close to 500 lbs dip down to parallel, crap all over the floor, come close to fainting (he may have actually lost consciousness, I can't remember), and then drop the weight on some other guy's foot.

Another time, I was working out when the power suddenly shut off. One of the guys on a treadmill just kept running and flipped himself over the front of the treadmill.


Not at the gym, but in high school at a mandatory pep rally. They had one of the weight lifting kids doing bench presses in the gym in front of the whole school. Every time he pushed the weights up he got a huge erection. He must have done it 5 or 6 times, and had no idea his boner was going up and down as he lifted. Everyone saw and was laughing, I feel kind of bad for him thinking about it now.


In high school this guy accidentally dropped a 45 lb circular weight ON THE TIP OF HIS PENIS as he loaded it into a leg lift. One of the worst things I've ever witnessed. He cried.



Have you ever found yourself in an argument so stupid and/or pointless that you were sure you were being punked? Like you keep looking away from the other person to check your surroundings for places Ashton Kutcher and a camera crew could come popping out of?

You're not the only one.

u/Anti-hollowkid asked: What is the dumbest argument you've ever been in?

Brace yourselves, folks. Some of these arguments are breathtakingly bonkers. The sheer number of people who are willing to argue with someone over provable facts and what that other person likes or doesn't like is just ... stunning. It's stunning, you guys. Just not in a good way.

I Know What I Like


My wife and I once argued over whether or not I liked mustard on my hot dog. I was for me liking mustard, she was against me liking mustard.

The argument lasted way longer that you could ever imagine it would.

- AardvarkAndy

A Stair Step

My brother and I argued if our staircase had 13 or 14 steps, based on an argument about if the floor of the second floor counts as a stair-step or not. We still have no solution.

- RazerWolf04

My dad is a stairbuilder and I spent many summers working at his warehouse, so I can clear this up. 14.

- Apples9308


My husband and I have this thing where we only say "I love you" on Saturdays. Every other day it's "I love you, but only on Saturdays." I don't know how it started, but it's been going for 11 years now.

We're both shiftworkers, so sometimes we have to stop and think what day it actually is. We had an argument recently over whether it was Saturday or not. I said it was Saturday, he said it was Friday. It was Monday.

- FormalMango


I remember when I was about 13 my parents had an hour-long shouting match that ended with them almost getting divorced. The issue? Whether or not the nation of Iraq has a coastline.

My mother arguing that Iraq had a coastline, while my stepdad argued that it did not. This was back in 2004, and they are still quite happily married to this day. That incident is something they look back on and laugh about, and both of them admit it was really a pretty stupid thing to argue over.

- dontcryformegiratina


With an ex:

"I owe you $80 for the bills of ours that you pay, and you owe me $40 for the bills of ours that I paid. Here's $40 in cash; we're even."

She did not understand this.

I literally had to go get another $40 out of the ATM, and hand the $80 to her. Then I had her hand me the $40 she owed me.

"Now how much do you have in your hand?"

She still didn't understand.

She somehow has a college degree.

- Speedly

Mini Wheats

When we were kids my brother and I got in a physical fight because he said I like mini wheats and I insisted I didn't. His argument was that I always sang the mini wheats song and I was deeply offended that he wasn't aware that it was just stuck in my head but I hated the cereal. I actually did like the cereal I'm not sure why I was arguing with him about it but I remember how genuinely angry I was.

- shicole3



I'll tell you about the only legal trouble I've ever been in, the fight that got me arrested. It started over whether we should return a box of crayons or not, and to this day I don't have any idea how it escalated to the point of the cops being called, but they were and I was the one taken in.

- CorrectionalChard

That's Unfair

My boyfriend insisted that when two people are in an argument and one makes a point so reasonable and logical the other one can't disagree with it - it's unfair. I tried, logically and reasonably, to explain several times why that is just winning the argument, proving your point thoroughly and is completely fair.

His answer was that I was being unfair.

- ShyAcorn

Pure Masochism

How the ch in masochism is pronounced. My friend caught me saying "masoKism" while he would say "masoSYism."

To be fair, he grew up speaking French, in which the ch in masochism is pronounced in "his" way. But he insisted that I was the wrong one here and that was just infuriating.

- argofire

Emailing NASA

A woman was adamant that looking at the big solar eclipse on the television was unsafe unless you were wearing glasses. She wouldn't believe us and insisted on emailing NASA to check.

- derawin07

A Non-Standard Ruler? 

I worked for a company that made signs. We had a customer ask for signs that were 7mm wide that were to go on a door. Our sign makers figured the order meant inches because 7mm is pretty small, so made them 7 inches. I got a phone call from the customer who went mad at me for making them the wrong size. So I put a reorder through for 7 mm.

Argued with the sign makers over it but they eventually agreed to do it after I shown them the order in writing. I even had the customer put her complaint in writing, reiterating the size they wanted.

7mm signs went out and a day later I get the customer on the phone literally screaming at me.

Cue the dumb argument - we ended up having an argument over how big a millimetre is, and obviously everyone in the office were laughing, but this customer just wouldn't accept it and said we must be using a non-standard ruler to measure.

Ended up being escalating to the sales department manager who refused to issue a refund. We still don't know what they actually meant.

- Lovelocke

This Unusual Vegan Argument

Was in a pub with a few friends, and some random Dude dropped an ear, and somehow figured I'm vegan. Well, people like him are the reason I usually avoid mentioning it. He came up to me and insisted on starting a discussion about veganism. He claimed that by the end of it, I would be eating meat again.

He listed some stupid arguments, I told him I was not convinced and then tried to keep on drinking beer with my friends. He followed me, and wanted me to "try to convert him to a vegan." I stupidly listed some of my reasons thinking it would make him go away. He told me he still was not convinced, so I was like whatever. Again, I really just wanted to drink beer with my friends.

That dude followed me all night and expected me to try make him vegan. Doesn't matter what I said, and all the reasons that for me are obviously good enough to be vegan. He'd be just like "No, that doesn't convince me, therefore your argument and how you life is stupid."

Didn't matter how often I told him that I honestly don't care; 5 minutes later he would come up to me again "I'm still not vegan, so veganism is stupid, all your arguments were stupid, now give me a good reason to become vegan!" At one point, I was literally yelling at him that I don't give a single flying f about what he eats and why, that it's in no way my responsibility to "turn somebody vegan" and in no way his business what I eat.

Honestly, for that dude, I would have bought a whole ham, just to shove it up his stupid annoying face.

- onlytruebertos

Monty Python

In college my roommate and I argued about a line in Monty Python & the Holy Grail. The scene with the Black Knight where the line "Alright, we'll call it a draw" is uttered. We argued about who said that line, whether it was King Arthur or the Black Knight.

It went on for hours longer than it should have because I was stubborn and refused to admit I was wrong.

- Skrivus

Albert or Arnold


Whether Albert Einstein or Arnold Schwarzenegger would be more useful to have around during a Zombie apocalypse. How on earth would Albert Einstein come in handy!?

- Gerrard1995

Below Sea Level

I live on an island and when you go upland and you look out the sea looks like it's higher than or on the same level as the land. It's just a weird perspective thing because of the horizon. One day some kid says that it's because the island is under sea level.

I'm like wtf bro all of us would be with the fishes. He argues that no that's not true and if I just go upland I'll see. We then spend a good 5 minutes of my time arguing about it until I decided to leave this kid in his stupidity. He even said we shouldn't believe everything adults tell us and sometimes we need to think for ourselves.

This kid was older than me and was going to a good school. Lost my respect for him ever since then.

- -justforclout-


Someone tried to fight with me over how to spell my name.

Now, my name is in a lot of languages with slightly different spellings. I would have accepted any of those spellings, but this one was just... Not even close. It didn't make any logical sense.

An analogous example is if my name was Thomas and someone was insisting it was spelled Tomash. And not just the name Thomas in general, but that me specifically, on my birth certificate, was named Tomash. I know how to spell my own name.

I swear to god, it went on for like an hour.

- TK-DuVeraun

Whales Are Mammals

I was in an online chat room one day, and we were talking about whales. I commented on how whales are mammals and the next thing you know, someone was arguing with me and trying to convince me that a whale was a fish.

- kawaii_psycho451


Stupid microwaves. Having a man child talk down to me about how microwaves work only for him to google it and prove me right. He slept on the sofa that night.

- sun_phobic

Shower Schedule

My friend keeps telling me that the norm is that a person should shower once a week. This has been going on for years. I'm almost convinced he's trolling me.

- LibrarianGovernment

No Balloons For Grandma

My cousin and I argued over a balloon going to Heaven. We were at his big sisters prom send off and he let a balloon go and it went high into the sky.

He then said this balloon will go up past space and go to Heaven and reach grandma (God rest her soul). And I was like no it's not and it's probably not even gonna reach space. Releasing balloons is terrible for the environment and kills/harms so much wildlife.

He got really mad and defensive and started telling me to google it and do my research and I'm like I don't have to google it you idiot. He was mad at me for a good week.

- Dskee02

Spontaneous Dolphin Existence


How dolphins reproduced. It took me a few solid minutes of explaining to her that dolphins have reproductive organs and that they did not just pop into existence. The argument began with her saying she wanted to work with sea creatures.

Personally, I hope she was messing with me cause I lost a little faith in humanity that day.

- thebeststory

Male Chickens

I repeatedly had the argument with a friend over whether roosters were chickens. She was convinced that only the females were chickens (hens). We were 18 at the time.

- bee_zah

Lightning McQueen

Me and my friend were drinking underage, we ended up in an argument of whether lightning McQueen's eyes were blue or green. Somehow throughout the whole thing both of us never thought to straight up google a picture.

- 23071115

But ... Ice Floats

Waiter/Host here.

Woman wanted ice on the bottom of her drink.

Now read that sentence again and try to imagine arguing with that particular brand of stupid.

- FarWoods

Time Zones Exist

Coworker claimed that it was the same time of day and the same season on the whole globe. Had to get 4 coworkers to confirm to him that time zones do in fact exist.

- JustARegularToaster


My brother is colorblind. And he CONSTANTLY tries to correct me on what color things are.

"Hey could you hand me that red _____?"

"that's orange"

"no, it's red"



It is the base of our most common and heated arguments.

- droneb2hive

Andre 2000?


I'm late, but I saw this question and instantly remembered that I was booted from a Facebook group because I called someone out on a lie that was not only bull, but extremely pointless. She was friends with the moderator and they made the case that my argument over such a little lie was more of a problem than the lie itself (though they didn't refer to it as a lie.)

The woman said that she used to babysit for Andre 3000 and that his name was Andre 2000 - but he changed it after the year 2000 had passed. This was so easily disproven it was ridiculous. Their debut album came out in 1994 and he was already going by Andre 3000 at that time.

The argument wasn't a huge long drawn out thing, but the fact that either of us were on Facebook at separate times meant that the responses were over a long period of time so this argument lasted a few days.

It was stupid.

- P1ST0L_Wh1PP3D

Stars Like Our Sun

I was arguing with my grandpa about stars he didn't believe that there are other stars like our sun. Basically he thought there is only the sun, the moon and the earth.


Richard Nixon

I have a degree in history. I mostly focused on nationalism. Wrote a 50 page paper on it and Richard Nixon with around 50 100 sources. Looked at micro film for hours on end. Part of the paper focused on how Nixon being chair of the house committee of Unamerican Activities was used as a powerful weapon to use against political enemies. It also inspired Joe McCarthy. Have had people tell me I was wrong and Nixon was never elected to a position besides the president and Joe McCarthy came before Nixon. I stopped trying to talk history to people.

I also know quite a bit about the history of the Balkans its amazing how many Serbs refuse to believe Tito did anything wrong.

Wrote 100 page paper on nationalism in Israel. Its frustrating to talk about because for some reason a lot of people think Palestinian firing rockets randomly into Israel is ok but if Israel retaliates the people get up in arms over a targeted air strike that kills 3 people.


Balloon to Heaven

My cousin and I argued over a balloon going to Heaven. We were at his big sisters prom send off and he let a balloon go and it went high into the sky. He then said this balloon will go up past space and go to Heaven and reach grandma (God rest her soul). And I was like no it's not and it's probably not even gonna reach space.

And he got really mad and defensive and started telling me to google it and do my research and I'm like I don't have to google it you idiot. He was mad at me for a good week.


Binder Clips

I got into an argument with a co-worker over how we were attaching two pages of a letter together: small binder clips or paper clips.

He felt that paper clips would leave a "dent" in the paper when removed, but binder clips won't. He refused to staple them together. I felt that binder clips would also leave a "dent", so we might as well just use the paper clips.

It ended with him saying: "Do what you want [me], I don't care!" and storming off.



Once got accused of faking being Jewish. Why? I have no clue. We argued over the course of a month, any time I'd bring it up and she heard about it, she'd begin going after me for "faking it".

My mother's side is ethnically Jewish. Grandparents were practicing.




3 friends and I once got into an argument about how to pronounce Nutella. It lasted for about 3-4 months. It was hilarious how serious we took it, it'd get heated but never for real serious.

I think someone even called the company that made it to check, or that may have been for the Cheetos company. We were really bored in high school.


Lingerie Boxes

Late to the party, but there it is.

I'm a manager at a small store. We're only 4 working there, so my team and I grew very close and we joke around a lot. Once during a slow shift, my employee and I had an argument because we were looking at the lingerie boxes, and I thought that two specific boxes had the same woman on it, but she was 100% positive they weren't the same person.

Looking back, I don't know why it was such a big deal to us at the time, but we even called another employee who lives across the street to come and tell us what the heck was up with that. Turns out I was right, and she was pretty salty about it. It was a great night.


Wicked Witch of the West

I almost got into an argument with an old girlfriend over Glinda the good witch from Oz. She insisted that Glinda was manipulating Dorothy to assassinate the Wicked Witch of the West and convince the Wizard to leave to create a political void she could fill.

I conceded the issue when I heard the whole premise because I thought it was too damn stupid to get worked up over.


Keep Your Hands to Yourself

Just the other day I legit got in an argument with my co-workers on why I don't like my butt being grabbed by anyone (I'm a guy). Seriously.

They went on about "I don't mind it. Mike and I do it all the time and we don't care." Yeah, that's nice dude, but I'm not you, and there's something called "Keep your hands to yourself" (which was taught to a good portion of us growing up). Just like how Karen wouldn't like it if I touched her boobs or her grabbing your crotch or frankly ANY area you wouldn't like being grabbed, keep away. In general, you should not be touching me in any areas after I've told you not to several times before.

So unless you're sleeping me or dating me, keep your damn hands off my toosh.



My best friend and I argued over whether or not telekinesis was possible. Her argument was that humans don't yet know what the human brain at 100% usage was capable of, and that telekinesis was inside the possibilities.

I said the brain does use 100%, just at different times.

We didn't speak to each other for four days.



How dolphins reproduced and whether or not ghost existed (back to back with the same person). It took me a few solid minutes of explaining to her that dolphins have reproductive organs and that they did not just pop into existence (the argument began with her saying she wanted to work with sea creatures).

How it shifted to the existence of ghosts is a solid and reasonable question to ask (I don't remember why). I had to then proceed to tell her that ghost hunting TV shows do not constitute as undeniable evidence.

Personally, I hope she was messing with me cause I lost a little faith in humanity that day. This was in high school SO... hopefully she was kidding.


Dogs and Chocolate


I told this stupid woman that chocolate is toxic to dogs. She went on to tell me how a little bit will just make them hyper and then they will calm down. I told her to google it. Her and her bf shut right up. Now they have a kid. Good luck, Jeremy and Andrea. morons.

I should also add that this argument started because Jeremy was giving his tiny dog chocolate and I told him it was toxic.


Is water wet?

My roommate and I have a recurring argument over whether or not water is wet l, and whether or not a person is considered wet underwater.

For the record, it is no to both questions.


Mission Trip

A kid a church telling me about the mission trip I went on. Not only was I not on that trip, but I had never been on any mission trip. We were good friends, so it's not like he would've mistaken someone else for me.

He insisted I was there as if an entire week long trip would just fall out of my memory. He even had stories of things we'd done together. I'm not sure if he thought I was lying, joking, stupid, or crazy, but I was pretty sure he was some combination thereof.


Dragon Tales

One time I got into a shouting match with my mom and little brother in the car. The issue? The names of the two-headed dragon from the PBS kids afternoon show Dragon Tales. I swore it was Zack and Macie.

It was actually Zak and Wheezie. I don't even remember why we were yelling about it.


Green Or Yellow?

When I was about 15 or so my mother and I spent about 20-30 minutes arguing about the color of a shirt. We agreed it was blue/green, but to me it was just a shade more blue, while to her it was just a bit more green.

Turns out, your eyeballs yellow as you age and hers were 24 years yellower than mine, so I think that skewed her color vision.


Stars In Their Multitude


I once got in an argument over whether or not a line from the song "Stars" in Les Mis says "...but mine is the way of the lord" or "mine is the way of the law".

I didn't even really care what he thought but he was so adamant and cocky that it got me heated. By the end of it we were shouting at each other and I had to apologize, which I think is what he wanted the whole time.



My brother is colorblind. And he CONSTANTLY tries to correct me on what color things are.

"Hey could you hand me that red _____?" "that's orange" "no, it's red" "orange" "YOU CANT EVEN KNOW".

It is the base of our most common and heated arguments.


Hot Water

About five years ago, my girlfriend (now wife) once had a very intense argument about whether or not hot water cleaned things better than cold water.

She genuinely believed that water temperature didn't matter. This is someone who has not one, but two masters degrees.

We argued for something like 2 hours, and we seriously almost broke up over the whole thing.


Biology Class

I had an argument with a girl IN THE MIDDLE OF A BIOLOGY CLASS in high school about how humans are not mammals. She thought a human was a human and we are not mammals because "mammals are animals and humans are not animals"

I tried explaining to her the difference between reptiles and mammals and how humans fall under the mammal category to try and educate her... but she just wouldn't listen.

I still have no idea why the BIOLOGY teacher did not get involved...


Solid Or Liquid?

Some classmates and I got into a heated debate as to whether or not the human body could count as a soup, salad, or sandwich. The teacher got mad at us, but hey! All we were doing was watching a movie.

For the record, my logic lays with soup- Liquid contained within a solid, at a hot temperature.