People Share Their Worst Online Dating Experiences.
Dating can be difficult, especially with the demands of a career, etc. it can be hard to to meet new people and make time for love. As the following AskReddit users share, their choice to try online dating was anything but a successful endeavor.
Source lists available at the end.
I was messaged by a girl on POF, let's call her "Ashley." It was one of those conversations that immediately took off, and we were talking for at least four hours straight. We decide to go get dinner. She was even better in person. Beautiful, witty, laughed at my stupid jokes and the whole bit. We exchange goodbyes, and that was the end of our evening.
We were texting until about midnight when she says, "You're going to hate me. We should just be friends." So, I'm like okay whatever. She calls me the next day and apologizes, so I give her a second chance. At the end of this date, we start making out like we're in middle school, and she stops us before we go too far and says that she's not ready for that yet. Okay, that's cool. I can respect that.
So, I get home and she texts me saying that I was just going to use her had we had sex and starts calling me a pig. Um, okay. The next day, I get a text from Ashley's phone asking if I knew where she was as I was the last person to talk to her. Her "friend" went to her house, where Ashley had apparently left her phone and her car and the front door was wide open. So, I told this mystery person to call the cops. When she refused, I said that I would and lo & behold, Ashley shows up. "I had just gone for a walk. I didn't know that you cared about me so much lol." Yeah okay, I'm done with this situation.
The next day, I go to work. I usually leave my phone in my truck until lunch. When I went out for lunch at noon, I had 115 new texts and 48 missed calls. Yup, that's it. I was done. So, I block her number and that's it. Wrong again.
She knew where I worked and roughly the time that I got off work, which is almost an hour and a half from where she lived. She tried following me home. I took a roundabout way of getting home and ran a few red lights, but I managed to lose her. It's been almost a year, and I haven't heard from her since.
Met a guy, and we chatted. He seemed relatively normal. We go on our first date in a pub (a well-lit one). We're having a couple drinks, talking and whatnot, and I see his hands under the table moving around. It cannot be. OH BUT IT IS.
He was touching himself. Apparently, I was turning him on too much, and he couldn't help himself. Our date ended pretty quickly after that. The followup is that when I got home, he'd sent me an epically long email about how I was unattractive and a tease. Oh, and he ended it with the phrase, "Don't bother responding because I will not read it." Done and done!
I met a girl who described herself as a 24-year-old woman who was blonde. I arrived on the date (all happy), but quickly realized that the girl who sat in front of me was a 40-year-old lady with two children who just finding an excuse to leave her house.
I traded numbers with a guy. We texted back and forth for a week. He was a really cool guy, and we had a lot in common. So, I decided to meet in person. Went to pick him up. He came out, and I didn't recognize him. His pictures on his profile were at least a decade old. He reeked of cigarettes and cheap cologne and smelled like he styled his hair with shaving cream.
We drive the short distance to get downtown. On the way there, he tells me about how his first two wives were "ludicrous." Already, I am feeling dread.
We get to the restaurant. He proceeds to order four DOUBLE Crown Royals and drinks them all in one hour. He became very drunk and belligerent. He started screaming and swearing at me while I said nothing. When I got up to go to the bathroom, the girl at the next table followed me in there and asked me if I needed help. That's how loud and abusive he was.
I literally sat in silence for the rest of the meal. When it was finally time to leave, he tried holding my hand and kissing me. Fearing that anything would happen to me out of rage over rejection, I politely but firmly refused his advances.
We got back to the parking garage, and I couldn't find my car. It was like a horrible parody of a Seinfeld episode. After searching for 20 full minutes, I finally find it. I was so grateful that I was in tears. We took off, and I did 90 on the interstate trying to get his drunk ass back to his place.
We pull up, and I say nothing. He leers at me and says seductively, "So, what now?" and invites me inside. I say politely, "You go home now." He gives me a disgusted look and finally gets out of my car. I sped away into the night. He mercifully never contacted me again.
Lesson learned. Never ever plan a meal for a first date, and always make arrangements to arrive and leave separately.
This woman seemed really cool. We were both 25. She had just finished her masters and was job hunting. She was fit, witty, and had piercings. I was a fan.
We meet. Well, fit was apparently five years prior, but she was "trying to get back to her normal weight" and so I thought it appropriate to use the older photos. I'm talking a huge difference from her photo to reality. I'm a pretty fit guy and have always been fairly health conscious, so this doesn't appeal to me, but we can be friends.
She's witty though, so we talk. Where's the wit? I toss her a couple of verbal jousts. Nothing. It turns out that her roommate had been helping her reply to messages. That's cool. I can be friends with nice people that aren't witty.
Okay. Well, her nose ring is actually a weirdly shiny wart that she tries to pass off as a nose ring because she's embarrassed by it.
All of this isn't the worst part though. We were out for dinner and went to a decent gourmet pizza joint. Low lights, thin crusts, and wine. Without asking, she reaches over and starts picking toppings of my pizza. Pardon me, but can you keep your damn hands off my prosciutto! It was unforgivable.
I went along with a friend on her first date with this guy that she met on OKC. She was nervous about meeting him alone so he told her to bring a friend and that he'd bring one of his friends as well. She tells the guy that I'm not single, and he says that it doesn't matter and that his friend is cool with it. He just likes to meet new people. I also like to meet new people, and I'm willing to help her out so I agree.
Fast forward to the bar. Guy shows up, and he's got to be as old as my dad. Which, whatever, she likes older guys. He still seemed kind of too old for her but that's none of my business. He also came alone. Perhaps he figured he'd score two women at once this way.
He sits down and everything goes to hell IMMEDIATELY. Guy keeps telling me how gorgeous I am while trying to touch my friend (trying to get her to hug him, putting his hand on her knee, telling her to smile, stuff like that. Just being really obnoxious. She finally tells him that he needs to stop touching her. He tells her to relax and keeps winking at us.Tells me that I need to "control" her. Telling us that we're "so gorgeous" and "so beautiful" over and over again as though he'd hit the magic number of compliments, and we'd just rip our clothes off right then and there. Friend and I are giving each other the serious eyebrows.
I try to engage him. I ask him to tell us about himself, what's his job ("I make a lot of money." Wink.), what do you like to do in your free time, etc. He's just giving us stupid vague answers like he's being coy and just keeps on repeating how pretty we are. Seeing that we're not going for it, he starts telling us (somewhat irritably) that we're "just on a scholarship." I ask him what that means, and he just winks again. This guy.
I say, "Let me tell you what I think that means. I think you're upset that we're not excited that a man of your age and means is spending time trying to woo us and that we're only behaving this way because we're young and attractive. Is that what you're trying to say?" He says no. I start to ask him again what "on scholarship" means, and he interrupts me. Holds up his finger he says, "You're gorgeous, but you really need to stop talking."
DATE OVER. Friend and I are agape. He WINKS AGAIN like he didn't just tell me to shut my mouth. Friend says, "Okay, we're done here. Goodnight." We stand up and go to another table in the same bar. He does not follow, though he does come by later to apologize. APOLOGY NOT ACCEPTED, UGH. Saw him around the bar later trying to foist his "charms" on other young women hanging about and having just about as much luck.
I'm currently in the military overseas. I got bored one day, so I got on OKC thinking, "You know what, why not." I'm on the site just messaging a few random girls when I start talking to this one girl that seemed pretty nice.
Well, we hit it off and decided to grab dinner one day. During the dinner, I not only found out that she had just turned 20 (which really isn't that big of a deal), but that she was also the daughter of one of the Chiefs on my ship.
I kind of just got out of there.
I met a guy on POF and found that he was pretty funny, generally good-looking, and professed to be adventurous and open to new experiences.
We go on a walk together on a popular oceanside pathway in my town. We talk the whole time. He definitely has the gift of gab, but something was off as he walked next to me. He would occasionally jerk his torso into a twist, maybe to look awkwardly behind him for some reason? It happened three times while walking with him, and I only ever saw it out of the corner of my eye because I think he only did it when I wasn't looking. I decided to write it off as nothing important.
He also warned, "When you meet me, my really deep voice maybe off-putting" ......What? No. Also, his voice was very average.
We sat down to continue our conversation and that's when I found out that I was on a date with the world's largest Negative Nancy. He described his life like one big series of unfortunate events (even if it really wasn't worth mentioning). Not my cup of tea.
By the end of that date, I was justifying all of his negativity with his recent management change at work, which turned out to be pretty rough. So, we went on another date.
Oh my gosh, it was the worst idea ever.
We went to coffee. For the ensuing hour, I heard the short and long of some woman who recently denied him a relationship. He had literally known her for TWO WEEKS, but apparently he had taken some serious offense to it.
He whipped out his phone and started sifting through their texts, READING ME HER RESPONSES and getting more and more worked up about the rejection as he read them.
It was sheer misery to sit there pretending to not be incredibly offended. Who wants to hear how you obviously pine away for the girl who had just rejected you?!
From what I gathered, the girl had gotten the same weird vibe that I was getting and had bowed out as quickly as possible. I followed her lead, and two days later, I met up with the guy to let him know that it just wasn't working for me.
He was gracious enough. I never got any long, drawn out texts about it.
My friend's story. He meets a girl, and they go on a few dates. She's smart, pretty, and they share some mutual interests.
He asks her whether she has plans for the weekend, to which she informs him that she will spend the day with her family since the rapture is coming.
Turns out, she believed in the whole Harold Camping world end prophecy.
I started talking to a guy. He was nice and had a few pictures up. Not overly handsome, but very nice and that goes a long way in my books. We agree to a date and since he lived by the restaurant we were headed to, I agreed to meet him at his place.
I get there, and he steps outside and smiles (revealing that he had absolutely no teeth in his mouth). Okay, he still was a nice guy, and I am not going to be judgemental.
He asks if I want to come in while he finishes getting ready. I walk into a nightmare. Everything was covered in at least an inch of dust and grime. Floors were disgusting and covered in dirt and garbage. There is trash covering almost all of the surfaces that I see, and the smell of cat piss is almost unbearable.
He doesn't even bat an eye.
He asks me if I'd like to have a seat (on his couch that was at some point a light color but had become a brownish-grey from the years of filth build up and cigarette smoke) I say, "No thanks, I'll just stand." He excuses himself to go and finish getting ready.
I texted my friend and told her to call me right away with a story about car trouble.
Five minutes later, I am out the door.
I know I could have been honest and told him his house was gross enough to make me want to scrub myself down with bleach using steel wool, but I was a coward.
I deleted my profile that night and have never tried online dating again.
We met at a local pub for a few drinks, and we got chicken fingers. The conversation was terrible, but I noticed that she was taking the chicken fingers and ripping them up in her hands and putting the breading in her huge purse. So naturally, I call her out on it. She smiled and said, "Oh, I'm just feeding Sammy" and pulled out a fat chinchilla from her purse. She plopped the thing in the middle of the table, and it just kind of chilled out.
I played with the chinchilla for a bit, and she kind of got mad at me for playing with it and put back in her purse. I was ready to call it and leave, but she mentioned that she could go for some ice cream, and I was cool with that.
We go to Ben & Jerry's. We get to talking about tattoos and piercing, and she tells me she has a nipple piercings. I'm like, "Oh?" and then she pulls down her shirt in the middle of Ben and Jerry's at 8pm and shows me her nipples. I just kind of keep a poker faced.
I decide to walk her to her car. She kiss attacks me, and well, she WAS kind of cute so I made out with her, sort of. Her lips were tense the whole time, and she licked my teeth. I friended her on Facebook for some reason after that. She had a Facebook page for her chinchilla that had more Facebook friends then I did. A few months later, the chinchilla died and it's Facebook was a memorial page where a bunch of people (like 35) commenting on how much they missed it. I 'liked' one of her statuses, and she called me crying. I unfriended her, but not the chinchilla. RIP Sammy.
We met on OKCupid, and we hit it off really well. She made cosplay video game weapons (like a Tidus sword or whatever) and was funny, and I was a huge dork that did not know how to talk to women. We met for dinner and a movie, and some time during the movie, she gets a call and sends it to voicemail.
After the movie ends, she checks her voicemail and finds out that her best friend has been in a bad car accident and that she needs to go now. She freaks out and can't find her car. I drive her around the parking lot looking for it while I struggle to think of anything to say, so I end up not saying anything.
I called once or twice after that, but she never answered. So, it was either a tragic end to the night or she managed to avoid a second date in the most dramatic and elaborate way ever possible.
On my last online date (which was about three years ago), we met at a restaurant, and she started reading off of a list of questions on her phone rapidly. Stuff mostly about my job and what I'd be doing over the next ten years. Every answer was responded with a negative, "Hmmm" and a new question. If this were a job interview, it would have been one of the worst ones that I've ever had. As a date, it was horrifying.
I had just set up my account, and I'm only 22, so I was not desperate or anything, just curious. I find a girl, who said she was also 22, who I think is relatively attractive, and I send her a 'smile'. She messages me back in 5 minutes, and we start talking. If I left a message for more than 30 minutes, she would message me again and started to get mad. She kept on saying that she was very serious and didn't want to play games. This went on for 2 days, and then I realized that this girl was too much and would have married me and had my babies that day if she could have. She would hop on anything that had a pulse and was obsessed with the idea of marriage and having kids. I told her my real name, which was a huge mistake because when I disabled the account, she located my work email online and messaged me on FB saying how she didn't understand why I would ignore her and wasn't responding to her messages and kept insisting that I wasn't getting them. "If you see this, I think your email isn't working right." "You must not go on FB much and can't see this." It was a nightmare. Never again!
Posts may be edited for clarity.
When you're a kid most adults will tell you one thing or another is "cool" and "fun." Odds are you're too young to form any kind of opinion on the matter one way or another. You're a kid, right? You don't know what you're eating for breakfast. However, when you get older and form that larger worldview, you realize that yeah, maybe that one time when you were a kid actually wasn't fun.
These are those stories.