People Who Thought They Were In The Perfect Relationship Reveal What Ended It.

Sometimes "happily ever after" doesn't quite last as long as thought. For some people in some relationships, "forever" has an unfortunate expiry date that has nothing to do with death or illness. We all hope that our current relationship will be "the one" but then reality strikes.

People on Reddit were asked: "What ended the relationship you thought would last forever?" These are some of the saddest answers.

She just didn't come home one night. Everything was pretty fine up until then. She went to party at a friends', and said she was coming home that night. Heard nothing. Walked all the way to the transit center looking for her in the middle of the night. Nothing. Eventually she called the next morning and said she'd be home the next day. I kinda knew something was up, but I never really pressed it.

She finally came home and she just seemed like a completely different person. Really cold, not affectionate, didn't want to be around me. Eventually got tired of it and asked her point blank what her deal was, and she admitted she cheated on me. Instead of being mature about it, she told me it was because I was going nowhere in life, because I worked a dead-end job with no desire to work somewhere better, and I wasn't going to college. Keep in mind this is during the economic downturn of 2008-2009, so finding a better job is risky, not likely to pay much, and I was spending all my time working my butt off to support us, so I couldn't go to college. Because she didn't want to get a job.

The whole thing pretty much turned me off of relationships for a good 5 years after. I had flings and such but wasn't really interested in anything serious.


When I feel like I'm putting in more effort then she is. I don't chase women any more. Women who actually want to spend time with you and put forth as much effort as you are much more fulfilling relationships.


Him starting to cheat 3 days after he proposed. Then he decided the best time to tell me he was unhappy when I told him I was pregnant. For a planned baby. 'I guess I'm stuck with you' will forever be burned in my mind.

He topped it off by dumping me 13 days after my miscarriage.

I'm better off but that has left deep scars.


I was married 18 years. The first 10 years were good to excellent. Then it started to go down hill. We started to grow apart. No drinking, no drugs, no abuse, no cheating. Just grew apart. Around year 14 she told me she was not attracted to me anymore and was no longer intrested in sex. I was DEVESTATED. I did everything for her. I loved her. I wanted her everyday. She never stopped being beautiful to me. After that is was a few times a year pity sex. Then the last year or so I was sleeping on the couch. I finally left her 8 years ago. I still miss her sometimes.

Looking back, the day she told me she was no longer attracted to me was the day it was over.


I was with my ex for about 2.5 years. The first year or so was fantastic. I didn't get along great with her family, but neither did she so that didn't really bother either of us. We moved in together, and things slowly started to fall apart. She had a 6 year old daughter, and it quickly became apparent that I was there to be her babysitter while she went out with her friends. She also refused to have a job in the summer (she had gone back to college) so I was stuck footing the bill for everything, minus the few hundred in baby bonus we would get every month. 

During that next summer she got back into playing WoW, and then when September rolled around, she didn't go to a single class, instead opting to spend all day, every day, sitting on the couch in front of her laptop playing WoW. Meanwhile, I was waking up at 7am to get her daughter ready for school, taking her to school, coming home, getting ready for work, going to work, coming home, cooking, doing the dishes, then MAYBE have ten minutes to relax before getting ready for bed. 

Naturally, we started to fight constantly. By that point it had already been about 5 months since we had had sex. I realized this was a terrible environment to raise a child, and that I hated her (my ex, not her daughter) more than I thought possible. So one day I walked into the living room and said "I'm not happy anymore. You're not happy anymore. [daughter] isn't happy anymore. I can't put her through that anymore, so I'm leaving." and moved out 3 days later.

That was the last time I saw her. We emailed back and forth a few times, about 2 months later one of our mutual friends died. I emailed her to tell her when the funeral was, she never responded, and never showed up. Last I heard (about 2 years ago now), she had dumped her daughter at her sister's house and taken off, and nobody really knew where she was. In all honesty, that makes me very happy, because at least I know her daughter is being properly raised by parents who actually care about her, and are able to dedicate the time to her.


I knew it was time when I no longer looked forward to seeing her. We used to be able to talk for hours about absolutely nothing and have such a great time doing so. Eventually, things began to spiral, and the only time we had fun was when we were doing something, whether it was sex or going out somewhere.

If you can't have fun doing nothing with your significant other, the relationship is no longer going anywhere.


I didn't mind her spending time with a male friend as I had complete trust in her. We were engaged and had been together for 5 years. She never cheated on me, but wanted me to claim ownership of her by refusing her to spend time with another man.

What confused me even more was that I had never been reluctant to show my lust and passion for her, we had loads of sex and had an absolutely awesome chemistry, and I even saved her life twice: once in a car accident and once while she had a very bad kitchen accident.

Over the years I have probably thought too much about this as she was the biggest romance of my life, but to this day I still don't completely understand it all. I suppose I should just let it be.


Long-distance. Being so far apart for so long and so often, the love we had was lost and when we saw each other we had to fall in love again each time. It got exhausting.


She said she was young and wants to experiment more and not be with one person. It was heartbreaking at the time.

But it worked out just fine. I'm now in a great relationship with a loving girl, we support each other through the good times and the bad. Moved in together 3 months ago and it was the best decision of my life.


I flew out to see my girlfriend for a three-day weekend to celebrate her graduation and I didn't feel like I had a girlfriend most of the time. I feel like I gave her a lot of leeway and space since she was hanging out with friends and family, but on the final day I was there, she barely wanted to talk to be around me.

She didn't want to eat anything in the morning until I made myself breakfast, then suddenly she was hungry. We watched some television in her apartment because she didn't feel like going anywhere. Her friend called her and asked if she wanted to go to a bar, and suddenly she perks up, changes into a dress and is ready to go, and says on the phone within earshot, "Oh, we just need to drop of my boyfriend at the airport, then we can go have some fun!"

Her friend was very rude, talking as I weren't even there , and took her time driving to the airport, only getting me to the terminal a half an hour before my flight was supposed to take off. I got out, grabbed my stuff, and had to run to the terminal to make my flight.

I realized on the flight that I didn't even kiss my girlfriend before leaving to go home.

That was pretty much the moment I realized that this relationship wasn't working and looking back, I figured out that she liked having a boyfriend so she wouldn't have to be alone when she was lonely and only spent time with me on her terms, when it was convenient for her. Totally one-sided and unhealthy.

I tried to see her one more time when I was in town for other business and she was too busy to hang out. So, I broke up with her and haven't talked to her since.


When another dude asked me why I broke up with her and then told me he's been with her for the past 6 months. I ran into him in front of the restaurant where I was meeting her to have our two year anniversary dinner.


Moving in together. If you're thinking about getting married but haven't lived with each other yet, try it first. Being locked in and face to face with your significant other every day has some trippy effects.


Marriage Counselor: "Ok, this first session has been informative. Lets meet again next week. Can we agree that in the meantime, neither of you will see other people?"

Me: "Of course."

Her: "I don't think so."

Marriage Counselor: "No, sorry - let me clarify: what I mean is, can we agree that neither of you will have sex with anyone other than each other before next week?"

Me: "There is no way I would ever have sex with someone other than my wife."

Her: "Sorry, I don't think I can make that promise."

-Probably the most crushing moment of my life...


When I was considering asking my now ex-husband for a divorce, my mom advised me to make a list of reasons for staying with him and reasons for ending the marriage. I did so and let her read it. She said, "I don't see anything for you on the list of reasons for staying with him." 

I had included things like, "I don't want to hurt him" and "He's diabetic and wouldn't have health insurance without me" on the list of reasons for staying. Mom was right. I asked for a divorce.


She came out as a lesbian. I don't know if I actually thought it would last forever but hell.


I was with my ex boyfriend for four years. I helped him through a lot and was his shoulder and a rock for a lot of things only for him to break me down a lot. He would tell me he was self conscious because I didn't look like the type of girl he would be with. I was stupid. I stayed with him through him cheating on me a couple times and attempting to cheat numerous other times. Constant emotional cheating while he was away at school and I was busting my butt back home to make money for an apartment for us. 

The last time I found he was trying to talk to another girl I just told him I couldn't do it anymore and ended up walking away. I remember sitting in my car forcing him to have the breakup convo with me and him telling me I was so cold. Oh well that's what years loving someone incapable of loving anyone but themselves will do to them. I'm better off today even though it still hurts sometimes.


When she and I hadn't been intimate in months, but had given each other permission to sleep with someone else, and conversed openly about it. And neither one of us cared that the relationship had reached that point.

The moment it hit me - that I'd ended up in that sort of situation, and didn't even mind - is the single most jarring thing in my life up to that point. I could point blame, but... what's the point?


I had to cancel a date because I had to work. I called her up and told her, and she said, "That's OK, I'll just go with [her ex]." It occurred to me that they might wind up in the sack. Then it occurred to me that I didn't really care if they did.


I worked 2nd shift. She kept insisting it was my job to do all of the chores because I was "home all day". Literally all of the chores. On Friday work day I would get home at 3am Saturday morning. She would wake me up at 8 telling me that I was lazy and all I wanted to do was sleep.


I wasn't in love, and neither was she, but we were best friends. We were both in high school, and we were really close; like, talk every day, hang out for hours every week and on the weekends, finish each other's sentences kind of close. I took her to homecoming once because she wanted to go and didn't have a date, even though I hate that kind of thing.

We'd been joined at the hip for at least a year and a half when I told her that to break up with her new boyfriend because he was a heroin addict who would ignore her for days at a time. (It was an online relationship, and those suck anyway, but even if they didn't I don't think "stop dating a heroin addict who has no plans on stopping the whole heroin deal" is a bad idea.).

She told me that I was "disrespecting her" and stopped talking to me for at least two years straight. Now she's with a real-life boyfriend who she lives with, but he's an emotionally abusive jerk. I unfriended her on Facebook a week or two ago because I was tired of witnessing the train wreck that is her life.


When I realised that in order for me to be happy in a relationship, I have to be able to see them in person more than once every 2 months.

Being away from someone you really care about can become very wearing, and eventually you stop missing them. I wish it hadn't gotten to that point but it did.


To summarize as best I can, my father suddenly fell into a coma my junior year of college. I flew out to see him and my mom, and spent about two weeks there before the doctors confirmed our fears: he was unlikely to ever come out of it, and would have significant damage if he did (likely blind and mute, almost entirely paralyzed, etc). Per his living will, we asked that my father be taken off of life support.

I wasn't really in contact much with anyone from college during this time period, as I obviously had other things on my mind. When I got home, the first thing I did was go to my boyfriend's room (we still lived in the dorms) to tell him what had happened. I got about five minutes into the explanation, clearly distraught, when a girl I'd never met before walked in. My boyfriend proceeded to greet her and chat with her for forty-five minutes, completely ignoring me the entire time. I finally left, went back to my room, and cried until I went to sleep.

Next morning, he knocks on my door - I assumed, to check on me. Nope. Instead, he sits me down and tells me that I'm the reason he never has any fun at college (of course that's it, not his 4chan/LoL addiction and nocturnal sleep schedule and severe depression), and that things needed to change or we needed to take a break. We were on-again, off-again anyway, so this wasn't exactly out of the blue; however, it really made me realize that he didn't actually care about me in any way I could understand. Apparently, while I had been standing by my father's death bed, he had been getting drunk and flirting with this girl (drinking and flirting being two things he constantly reprimanded me for, perceived or otherwise). So I happily agreed to break it off then and there.


She cheated on me and when I suggested we could work past it slowly she threatened to kill herself if I didn't move past it straight away.


I was seeing someone I was very much in love with for almost 4 years. Sharing your love, and life with someone should supplement, enhance your life, not diminish it. When it got to the point everything in my life was suffering BECAUSE of my relationship, it was time to end it. My work was slipping, my management team were telling me my performance was dropping. My friends barely spoke to me any more, I was arguing with my family a lot because I was always in a bad mode.

It felt like at the time that it would be impossible to live without her. But it was also impossible to live with her in my life, so no matter how I felt it had to end.

I am now in a 3 year relationship with who I hope wants to spend the rest of her life with me, and my Ex (from this post) is currently happy in her life in a different country.

Follow your heart, but when your heart starts to screw up your life, follow your brain.


Sources: 1, 2

Some of this material has been edited for clarity.

Have you ever found yourself in an argument so stupid and/or pointless that you were sure you were being punked? Like you keep looking away from the other person to check your surroundings for places Ashton Kutcher and a camera crew could come popping out of?

You're not the only one.

u/Anti-hollowkid asked: What is the dumbest argument you've ever been in?

Brace yourselves, folks. Some of these arguments are breathtakingly bonkers. The sheer number of people who are willing to argue with someone over provable facts and what that other person likes or doesn't like is just ... stunning. It's stunning, you guys. Just not in a good way.

I Know What I Like


My wife and I once argued over whether or not I liked mustard on my hot dog. I was for me liking mustard, she was against me liking mustard.

The argument lasted way longer that you could ever imagine it would.

- AardvarkAndy

A Stair Step

My brother and I argued if our staircase had 13 or 14 steps, based on an argument about if the floor of the second floor counts as a stair-step or not. We still have no solution.

- RazerWolf04

My dad is a stairbuilder and I spent many summers working at his warehouse, so I can clear this up. 14.

- Apples9308


My husband and I have this thing where we only say "I love you" on Saturdays. Every other day it's "I love you, but only on Saturdays." I don't know how it started, but it's been going for 11 years now.

We're both shiftworkers, so sometimes we have to stop and think what day it actually is. We had an argument recently over whether it was Saturday or not. I said it was Saturday, he said it was Friday. It was Monday.

- FormalMango


I remember when I was about 13 my parents had an hour-long shouting match that ended with them almost getting divorced. The issue? Whether or not the nation of Iraq has a coastline.

My mother arguing that Iraq had a coastline, while my stepdad argued that it did not. This was back in 2004, and they are still quite happily married to this day. That incident is something they look back on and laugh about, and both of them admit it was really a pretty stupid thing to argue over.

- dontcryformegiratina


With an ex:

"I owe you $80 for the bills of ours that you pay, and you owe me $40 for the bills of ours that I paid. Here's $40 in cash; we're even."

She did not understand this.

I literally had to go get another $40 out of the ATM, and hand the $80 to her. Then I had her hand me the $40 she owed me.

"Now how much do you have in your hand?"

She still didn't understand.

She somehow has a college degree.

- Speedly

Mini Wheats

When we were kids my brother and I got in a physical fight because he said I like mini wheats and I insisted I didn't. His argument was that I always sang the mini wheats song and I was deeply offended that he wasn't aware that it was just stuck in my head but I hated the cereal. I actually did like the cereal I'm not sure why I was arguing with him about it but I remember how genuinely angry I was.

- shicole3



I'll tell you about the only legal trouble I've ever been in, the fight that got me arrested. It started over whether we should return a box of crayons or not, and to this day I don't have any idea how it escalated to the point of the cops being called, but they were and I was the one taken in.

- CorrectionalChard

That's Unfair

My boyfriend insisted that when two people are in an argument and one makes a point so reasonable and logical the other one can't disagree with it - it's unfair. I tried, logically and reasonably, to explain several times why that is just winning the argument, proving your point thoroughly and is completely fair.

His answer was that I was being unfair.

- ShyAcorn

Pure Masochism

How the ch in masochism is pronounced. My friend caught me saying "masoKism" while he would say "masoSYism."

To be fair, he grew up speaking French, in which the ch in masochism is pronounced in "his" way. But he insisted that I was the wrong one here and that was just infuriating.

- argofire

Emailing NASA

A woman was adamant that looking at the big solar eclipse on the television was unsafe unless you were wearing glasses. She wouldn't believe us and insisted on emailing NASA to check.

- derawin07

A Non-Standard Ruler? 

I worked for a company that made signs. We had a customer ask for signs that were 7mm wide that were to go on a door. Our sign makers figured the order meant inches because 7mm is pretty small, so made them 7 inches. I got a phone call from the customer who went mad at me for making them the wrong size. So I put a reorder through for 7 mm.

Argued with the sign makers over it but they eventually agreed to do it after I shown them the order in writing. I even had the customer put her complaint in writing, reiterating the size they wanted.

7mm signs went out and a day later I get the customer on the phone literally screaming at me.

Cue the dumb argument - we ended up having an argument over how big a millimetre is, and obviously everyone in the office were laughing, but this customer just wouldn't accept it and said we must be using a non-standard ruler to measure.

Ended up being escalating to the sales department manager who refused to issue a refund. We still don't know what they actually meant.

- Lovelocke

This Unusual Vegan Argument

Was in a pub with a few friends, and some random Dude dropped an ear, and somehow figured I'm vegan. Well, people like him are the reason I usually avoid mentioning it. He came up to me and insisted on starting a discussion about veganism. He claimed that by the end of it, I would be eating meat again.

He listed some stupid arguments, I told him I was not convinced and then tried to keep on drinking beer with my friends. He followed me, and wanted me to "try to convert him to a vegan." I stupidly listed some of my reasons thinking it would make him go away. He told me he still was not convinced, so I was like whatever. Again, I really just wanted to drink beer with my friends.

That dude followed me all night and expected me to try make him vegan. Doesn't matter what I said, and all the reasons that for me are obviously good enough to be vegan. He'd be just like "No, that doesn't convince me, therefore your argument and how you life is stupid."

Didn't matter how often I told him that I honestly don't care; 5 minutes later he would come up to me again "I'm still not vegan, so veganism is stupid, all your arguments were stupid, now give me a good reason to become vegan!" At one point, I was literally yelling at him that I don't give a single flying f about what he eats and why, that it's in no way my responsibility to "turn somebody vegan" and in no way his business what I eat.

Honestly, for that dude, I would have bought a whole ham, just to shove it up his stupid annoying face.

- onlytruebertos

Monty Python

In college my roommate and I argued about a line in Monty Python & the Holy Grail. The scene with the Black Knight where the line "Alright, we'll call it a draw" is uttered. We argued about who said that line, whether it was King Arthur or the Black Knight.

It went on for hours longer than it should have because I was stubborn and refused to admit I was wrong.

- Skrivus

Albert or Arnold


Whether Albert Einstein or Arnold Schwarzenegger would be more useful to have around during a Zombie apocalypse. How on earth would Albert Einstein come in handy!?

- Gerrard1995

Below Sea Level

I live on an island and when you go upland and you look out the sea looks like it's higher than or on the same level as the land. It's just a weird perspective thing because of the horizon. One day some kid says that it's because the island is under sea level.

I'm like wtf bro all of us would be with the fishes. He argues that no that's not true and if I just go upland I'll see. We then spend a good 5 minutes of my time arguing about it until I decided to leave this kid in his stupidity. He even said we shouldn't believe everything adults tell us and sometimes we need to think for ourselves.

This kid was older than me and was going to a good school. Lost my respect for him ever since then.

- -justforclout-


Someone tried to fight with me over how to spell my name.

Now, my name is in a lot of languages with slightly different spellings. I would have accepted any of those spellings, but this one was just... Not even close. It didn't make any logical sense.

An analogous example is if my name was Thomas and someone was insisting it was spelled Tomash. And not just the name Thomas in general, but that me specifically, on my birth certificate, was named Tomash. I know how to spell my own name.

I swear to god, it went on for like an hour.

- TK-DuVeraun

Whales Are Mammals

I was in an online chat room one day, and we were talking about whales. I commented on how whales are mammals and the next thing you know, someone was arguing with me and trying to convince me that a whale was a fish.

- kawaii_psycho451


Stupid microwaves. Having a man child talk down to me about how microwaves work only for him to google it and prove me right. He slept on the sofa that night.

- sun_phobic

Shower Schedule

My friend keeps telling me that the norm is that a person should shower once a week. This has been going on for years. I'm almost convinced he's trolling me.

- LibrarianGovernment

No Balloons For Grandma

My cousin and I argued over a balloon going to Heaven. We were at his big sisters prom send off and he let a balloon go and it went high into the sky.

He then said this balloon will go up past space and go to Heaven and reach grandma (God rest her soul). And I was like no it's not and it's probably not even gonna reach space. Releasing balloons is terrible for the environment and kills/harms so much wildlife.

He got really mad and defensive and started telling me to google it and do my research and I'm like I don't have to google it you idiot. He was mad at me for a good week.

- Dskee02

Spontaneous Dolphin Existence


How dolphins reproduced. It took me a few solid minutes of explaining to her that dolphins have reproductive organs and that they did not just pop into existence. The argument began with her saying she wanted to work with sea creatures.

Personally, I hope she was messing with me cause I lost a little faith in humanity that day.

- thebeststory

Male Chickens

I repeatedly had the argument with a friend over whether roosters were chickens. She was convinced that only the females were chickens (hens). We were 18 at the time.

- bee_zah

Lightning McQueen

Me and my friend were drinking underage, we ended up in an argument of whether lightning McQueen's eyes were blue or green. Somehow throughout the whole thing both of us never thought to straight up google a picture.

- 23071115

But ... Ice Floats

Waiter/Host here.

Woman wanted ice on the bottom of her drink.

Now read that sentence again and try to imagine arguing with that particular brand of stupid.

- FarWoods

Time Zones Exist

Coworker claimed that it was the same time of day and the same season on the whole globe. Had to get 4 coworkers to confirm to him that time zones do in fact exist.

- JustARegularToaster


My brother is colorblind. And he CONSTANTLY tries to correct me on what color things are.

"Hey could you hand me that red _____?"

"that's orange"

"no, it's red"



It is the base of our most common and heated arguments.

- droneb2hive

Andre 2000?


I'm late, but I saw this question and instantly remembered that I was booted from a Facebook group because I called someone out on a lie that was not only bull, but extremely pointless. She was friends with the moderator and they made the case that my argument over such a little lie was more of a problem than the lie itself (though they didn't refer to it as a lie.)

The woman said that she used to babysit for Andre 3000 and that his name was Andre 2000 - but he changed it after the year 2000 had passed. This was so easily disproven it was ridiculous. Their debut album came out in 1994 and he was already going by Andre 3000 at that time.

The argument wasn't a huge long drawn out thing, but the fact that either of us were on Facebook at separate times meant that the responses were over a long period of time so this argument lasted a few days.

It was stupid.

- P1ST0L_Wh1PP3D

Stars Like Our Sun

I was arguing with my grandpa about stars he didn't believe that there are other stars like our sun. Basically he thought there is only the sun, the moon and the earth.


Richard Nixon

I have a degree in history. I mostly focused on nationalism. Wrote a 50 page paper on it and Richard Nixon with around 50 100 sources. Looked at micro film for hours on end. Part of the paper focused on how Nixon being chair of the house committee of Unamerican Activities was used as a powerful weapon to use against political enemies. It also inspired Joe McCarthy. Have had people tell me I was wrong and Nixon was never elected to a position besides the president and Joe McCarthy came before Nixon. I stopped trying to talk history to people.

I also know quite a bit about the history of the Balkans its amazing how many Serbs refuse to believe Tito did anything wrong.

Wrote 100 page paper on nationalism in Israel. Its frustrating to talk about because for some reason a lot of people think Palestinian firing rockets randomly into Israel is ok but if Israel retaliates the people get up in arms over a targeted air strike that kills 3 people.


Balloon to Heaven

My cousin and I argued over a balloon going to Heaven. We were at his big sisters prom send off and he let a balloon go and it went high into the sky. He then said this balloon will go up past space and go to Heaven and reach grandma (God rest her soul). And I was like no it's not and it's probably not even gonna reach space.

And he got really mad and defensive and started telling me to google it and do my research and I'm like I don't have to google it you idiot. He was mad at me for a good week.


Binder Clips

I got into an argument with a co-worker over how we were attaching two pages of a letter together: small binder clips or paper clips.

He felt that paper clips would leave a "dent" in the paper when removed, but binder clips won't. He refused to staple them together. I felt that binder clips would also leave a "dent", so we might as well just use the paper clips.

It ended with him saying: "Do what you want [me], I don't care!" and storming off.



Once got accused of faking being Jewish. Why? I have no clue. We argued over the course of a month, any time I'd bring it up and she heard about it, she'd begin going after me for "faking it".

My mother's side is ethnically Jewish. Grandparents were practicing.




3 friends and I once got into an argument about how to pronounce Nutella. It lasted for about 3-4 months. It was hilarious how serious we took it, it'd get heated but never for real serious.

I think someone even called the company that made it to check, or that may have been for the Cheetos company. We were really bored in high school.


Lingerie Boxes

Late to the party, but there it is.

I'm a manager at a small store. We're only 4 working there, so my team and I grew very close and we joke around a lot. Once during a slow shift, my employee and I had an argument because we were looking at the lingerie boxes, and I thought that two specific boxes had the same woman on it, but she was 100% positive they weren't the same person.

Looking back, I don't know why it was such a big deal to us at the time, but we even called another employee who lives across the street to come and tell us what the heck was up with that. Turns out I was right, and she was pretty salty about it. It was a great night.


Wicked Witch of the West

I almost got into an argument with an old girlfriend over Glinda the good witch from Oz. She insisted that Glinda was manipulating Dorothy to assassinate the Wicked Witch of the West and convince the Wizard to leave to create a political void she could fill.

I conceded the issue when I heard the whole premise because I thought it was too damn stupid to get worked up over.


Keep Your Hands to Yourself

Just the other day I legit got in an argument with my co-workers on why I don't like my butt being grabbed by anyone (I'm a guy). Seriously.

They went on about "I don't mind it. Mike and I do it all the time and we don't care." Yeah, that's nice dude, but I'm not you, and there's something called "Keep your hands to yourself" (which was taught to a good portion of us growing up). Just like how Karen wouldn't like it if I touched her boobs or her grabbing your crotch or frankly ANY area you wouldn't like being grabbed, keep away. In general, you should not be touching me in any areas after I've told you not to several times before.

So unless you're sleeping me or dating me, keep your damn hands off my toosh.



My best friend and I argued over whether or not telekinesis was possible. Her argument was that humans don't yet know what the human brain at 100% usage was capable of, and that telekinesis was inside the possibilities.

I said the brain does use 100%, just at different times.

We didn't speak to each other for four days.



How dolphins reproduced and whether or not ghost existed (back to back with the same person). It took me a few solid minutes of explaining to her that dolphins have reproductive organs and that they did not just pop into existence (the argument began with her saying she wanted to work with sea creatures).

How it shifted to the existence of ghosts is a solid and reasonable question to ask (I don't remember why). I had to then proceed to tell her that ghost hunting TV shows do not constitute as undeniable evidence.

Personally, I hope she was messing with me cause I lost a little faith in humanity that day. This was in high school SO... hopefully she was kidding.


Dogs and Chocolate


I told this stupid woman that chocolate is toxic to dogs. She went on to tell me how a little bit will just make them hyper and then they will calm down. I told her to google it. Her and her bf shut right up. Now they have a kid. Good luck, Jeremy and Andrea. morons.

I should also add that this argument started because Jeremy was giving his tiny dog chocolate and I told him it was toxic.


Is water wet?

My roommate and I have a recurring argument over whether or not water is wet l, and whether or not a person is considered wet underwater.

For the record, it is no to both questions.


Mission Trip

A kid a church telling me about the mission trip I went on. Not only was I not on that trip, but I had never been on any mission trip. We were good friends, so it's not like he would've mistaken someone else for me.

He insisted I was there as if an entire week long trip would just fall out of my memory. He even had stories of things we'd done together. I'm not sure if he thought I was lying, joking, stupid, or crazy, but I was pretty sure he was some combination thereof.


Dragon Tales

One time I got into a shouting match with my mom and little brother in the car. The issue? The names of the two-headed dragon from the PBS kids afternoon show Dragon Tales. I swore it was Zack and Macie.

It was actually Zak and Wheezie. I don't even remember why we were yelling about it.


Green Or Yellow?

When I was about 15 or so my mother and I spent about 20-30 minutes arguing about the color of a shirt. We agreed it was blue/green, but to me it was just a shade more blue, while to her it was just a bit more green.

Turns out, your eyeballs yellow as you age and hers were 24 years yellower than mine, so I think that skewed her color vision.


Stars In Their Multitude


I once got in an argument over whether or not a line from the song "Stars" in Les Mis says "...but mine is the way of the lord" or "mine is the way of the law".

I didn't even really care what he thought but he was so adamant and cocky that it got me heated. By the end of it we were shouting at each other and I had to apologize, which I think is what he wanted the whole time.



My brother is colorblind. And he CONSTANTLY tries to correct me on what color things are.

"Hey could you hand me that red _____?" "that's orange" "no, it's red" "orange" "YOU CANT EVEN KNOW".

It is the base of our most common and heated arguments.


Hot Water

About five years ago, my girlfriend (now wife) once had a very intense argument about whether or not hot water cleaned things better than cold water.

She genuinely believed that water temperature didn't matter. This is someone who has not one, but two masters degrees.

We argued for something like 2 hours, and we seriously almost broke up over the whole thing.


Biology Class

I had an argument with a girl IN THE MIDDLE OF A BIOLOGY CLASS in high school about how humans are not mammals. She thought a human was a human and we are not mammals because "mammals are animals and humans are not animals"

I tried explaining to her the difference between reptiles and mammals and how humans fall under the mammal category to try and educate her... but she just wouldn't listen.

I still have no idea why the BIOLOGY teacher did not get involved...


Solid Or Liquid?

Some classmates and I got into a heated debate as to whether or not the human body could count as a soup, salad, or sandwich. The teacher got mad at us, but hey! All we were doing was watching a movie.

For the record, my logic lays with soup- Liquid contained within a solid, at a hot temperature.