Teachers Reveal What Actually Goes On At School When Students Aren't There.

When I was in elementary school I would have killed to be a fly on the wall in the teacher's lounge and get a chance to see what they actually do during lunch. The idea that teachers had a life outside of school hours baffled me; I didn't think they lived in the school or anything, but they definitely were "teachers", not "regular people". Boy, was I wrong.

Teachers of Reddit were asked: "What stuff goes on at schools that students don't know about?" These are some of the best answers.


Two teachers at my school were always very fake-flirtatious - to the knowledge of the students, they were flirty and fun and all the students wanted them to get together. They played it up very much, even doing a dance together at some variety show.

What the students didn't know was that the male teacher of the pair was acting as the beard for the female teacher while she dated another female teacher at the same school. It was actually very, very sweet.

cromble

We like to have sex just like people in any other profession.

I was late to class once because I had sex in the bathroom in the teachers lounge. Got a stain on my skirt... Luckily nobody noticed, or cared.

TeacherGotLaid

During summer vacation when the students are gone I hook my GameCube up to the huge projection TV in the AV room and play Mario Sunshine.

porgy_tirebiter

"Was he drunk when he made this test?" Yup, I sure was.

medic8388

We know when you find us cute and we are disgusted with it. Seriously, it's like a 5 year-old girl having a crush on me, but not as cute.

BloodQueef_McOral

Sometimes we decide to take you on as our cause. I had a student last year who showed up way behind the others in reading (and therefore every other subject too). His parents were firstgen immigrants and didn't speak English. I started a "study hall" after school for an hour so that all the kids could stay behind to read or do homework...all so this one student wouldn't feel singled out for tutoring. I read with him every day except on Fridays for an hour... and I stayed on top of his progress. Other teachers would ask, "How is your boy doing?" 

As summer rolled around I enrolled him in summer school and got him a student bus pass (technically this wasn't kosher of me to do because he didn't meet the age criteria) From my own pocket I spent $260 to fill up a smart trip card for his mother so that she could escort him to and from summer school via public transport. Through it all I lent him SO many books. at the end of it all I gave him the "My weird school daze" series as a reward for sticking with it. If I had packed my bags at 3:15 each day, he wouldn't be playing catch up, instead he would be repeating the year.

All this to say: You may not realize it ...but teachers spent a great deal of their personal time and energy trying to help you be successful.

DaveMagee83

Well at my school, there was tiny unused computer lab, only 4 computers, that we used to play runescape on.

MushroomMountain123

A lot of students don't realise that teachers spend a lot of time planning on how to deliver an interesting class on what is probably a very dry topic. Despite not being support by the government and hung out to dry by the media, most teachers agonise of delivering quality education that will improve the quality of life for their students. This is the [stuff] that really happens.

Sneakynuts2

The politics of your major's department. There are probably about a dozen professors in my department at college, and there are all sorts of weird factions among them, and every faction hates every other faction. If I have four classes with four different profs, it's likely that they all hate each other.

kirb87

Teachers have cliques and are sometimes so backstabbing and petty toward one another that it would cause them to be upset if they watched their students doing the same things.

[deleted]

We talk about the same ten students during our teacher-team meetings. We spend so much time talking about the same ten students. It is, in my opinion, such a great injustice to the other 110 students that I teach that most of my time "collaborating" with other teachers is just us sitting around moaning about how Johnny didn't do his homework again and how his mommy always takes his side and defends him. We aren't really "collaborating", we are just sitting around complaining about Johnny (and about nine other kids like him).

I spend about 3 hours per week in such meetings and they drain me more than anything. So much wasted time. Year after year, different Johnny.

kevinstonge

I laminated a piece of ham when I was a teacher's assistant. Wild.

prozvonit


I drink when I grade papers. It helps me get through the monotony, and I'm sure I grade a little easier.

jingle_hore

Sometimes I have to fart in class. So I go down in bottom of the class and I fart very slowly and then I walk back to my desk, and watch the students discuss who farted...

Hornyjew

Even the simple worksheet lessons can take hours of planning. And we have to plan every single day, even if we planned weeks in advance, because every little thing the students talk about causes us to rethink the ways in which we have to teach. Also it costs thousands of dollars a year.

DesertBluffsOrBust

Some adjunct positions require only a masters degree. And ONLY the degree - no teaching experience, recommendations, or interviews are required. If you have a masters in physics, you can have TOTAL CONTROL over a class by sending a few emails to get the job.

penisgoatee

I heard about a private war going on in the staff room at a school near me. One of the teachers got fed up of somebody else using his coffee mug.

He tried bringing in a half-cracked mug, sure that no one would want to steal it, but they did anyway.

He eventually solved the problem by drilling a hole in the mug and carrying a stopper for it around on a keyring so only he could use the mug.

barryandquagmire

Every Friday after school we play a drinking game where we name a kid and if two people say the same thing about the kid they drink. For example, "Javon" - "prison!"

ezmac328

Ever had an amazing lesson you really enjoyed? There's a strong chance that your teacher had to fight to be allowed to do it. There's a strong chance that there are many similar fights they've lost before too.

dndtweek89

As a teacher, I'm usually one to praise the positive aspects of the position. But here's a little bit of negativity for you:

A school will track your absences less so because they're concerned for your wellbeing, and more so because they're legally responsible for you. We notify your parents when you're absent. If you went missing and we failed to notify your family (leading them to believe you were safely at school), we would be liable for the ensuing fallout.

In a tangentially similar vein, to many people working for the district, you are just a bucket of money. If you leave one school and go to another, the bucket of money follows you to your new school. Attendance is important because schools cannot receive money for students who are not attending.

peachsicle 

Teachers hate grading homework as much as you hate doing it.

AYoloTurtl

We do talk so much smack about students in the teachers lounge...

[deleted]

When proctoring exams with a ton of kids in one room an multiple teachers floating around making sure no one cheats, we have a game. A teacher will whisper to another: "Stand next to the one most likely to go to prison." The other teacher casually stands next to that person, as if they were just wandering around the room and just happened to end up by that teacher. Then that one will ask the first "Stand next to the one mostly likely to run for office." And so on...

[deleted]

When the drug-sniffing dogs come around, teachers are more scared than the students.

Foreignlawyer

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When you're a kid most adults will tell you one thing or another is "cool" and "fun." Odds are you're too young to form any kind of opinion on the matter one way or another. You're a kid, right? You don't know what you're eating for breakfast. However, when you get older and form that larger worldview, you realize that yeah, maybe that one time when you were a kid actually wasn't fun.

These are those stories.

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