Take Off Your Rose Coloured Glasses: These Things Need To Stop Being Romanticized.
There are things engrained into our culture that have built up a reputation for being epic, honorable, or cool, when they are anything but.
Below are things that we need to stop romanticizing, as told on AskReddit. Check them out! A source to even more can be found on the last page.
The mafia or similar people. Always talking about how Al Capone was a gentleman and completely ignoring the horrible things he has done.
"Ride or die" relationships. I feel like there's a big wave of putting abusive relationships on a pedestal because forgiving each other's toxic behaviours is seen as evidence that they are just "made for each other" or "can't live without each other".
The recent obsession with the Joker and Harley Quinn is one example, but it's also spread to certain styles of music and other art.
Working long hours. If I get paid for 40 hours I want to work for 40 hours. You want me to work longer hours? You should pay for that. There is nothing good about going the extra mile if you are just being exploited by your boss to work longer.
The good old days. You're wearing rose tinted glasses, and have forgotten all the bad stuff.
The lives of shitty people after they die.
I understand the tribulations of addiction. That's not what I'm arguing.
My cousin died of a heroin overdose in a convenience store bathroom. After his funeral, friends and family alike were lauding him; going on and on about how he'll be missed and so on. The problem is, he was a jerk.
He stole from our great uncle, abandoned his wife and kids, lied to everyone.
And somehow his death erased all his bad deeds. I've seen this so many other times as well. Just because a terrible person died in a traumatic way doesn't make them any less terrible.
Social media amongst other things have probably completely drained majority of humans of all trust.
It's a hard truth, but majority of relationships these days are full on insecurity because of social media. Back in the day when you had a relationship, you didn't have 80+ guys liking your girlfriends picture on Instagram, Facebook or whatever and simultaneously commenting a bunch of weird emoji, so you didn't have as much of a reason to be insecure.
(I'm not saying it's a reason to be insecure, you should trust your boyfriend/girlfriend) but it's a hell of a lot easier to be insecure when you see countless guys liking your girlfriends photos, or messaging her constantly and making it quite clear that they're interested in her.
I'm a teenager and honestly, I can see pretty clearly how much damage social media is doing to us.
Being a gangster.
Kids that join gangs in urban neighborhoods do it, because they pretty much have no other choice. Suburban kids that have good homes don't need to. Listening to rap is one thing, but pretending you live that life is another.
Playing hard to get. Bad all around.
Bad for girls because it teaches them that showing interest in someone isn't okay, you have to pretend you're uninterested.
Bad for boys because it teaches them that when the girl firmly says "No," she's just playing hard to get. No means yes, keep going no matter what. (Which is bad for girls all over again.)
I can't believe no one has said this yet. People think high school is the prime of your life, and that you'll make your best, lifelong friends, and marry your highschool sweetheart.
Screw that. I had an okay time in highschool, but it was definitely a cesspool of awkward hormones and never ending drama.
Death by cancer. I legit made a blog post recounting my mom's last few days before she passed away and someone commented saying "this was beautiful". No, trust me, it really wasn't.
They might have been imagining a scene from a movie where a beautiful, yet bald woman lies on crisp white sheets and says "I love you" before passing peacefully away, but in reality she said "I love you" before lapsing into speaking gibberish for another half hour or so then being put on pain medication that kept her unconscious for 3 days till she eventually died, and the whole time we had to sit listening to her ragged breathing, wondering which breath would be her last.
Romeo and Juliet. Seriously! Growing up I thought it was some deep romantic tale but nah, it's just two teenagers who went waaaaaaaaaay overboard and killed themselves after knowing each other for a couple days. Like who wants to be like that?
Affairs. It's become a staple of romantic comedies and it's pretty gross and tone deaf.
I read somewhere awhile back that when middle school aged children were asked what they wanted to be when they grew up most of them said they wanted to be famous.
When asked what they wanted to be famous for they didn't know, or hadn't thought about it. They just wanted to be famous and get paid for existing.
It's kind of sad really.
Substance abuse, especially substance abuse by people working in creative fields. Drinking will kill your favorite writer or musician just as dead as anyone else and worse still, they'll probably be dead inside long before their heart stops.
The Greek gods. Zeus messed with any woman or animal he wanted to mess with whether they like it or not. Hera, his wife, tortured any woman that got with him because it was their fault for being beautiful, and therefore the reason behind Zeus's unfaithfulness. Cronus, Zeus's dad, ate all his children. Zeus only escaped because Cronus was fed a rock dressed as a child. And Hades, hee wasn't too bad. Kidnapped Persephone, Zeus's daughter, but she didn't mind. Despite this, Hades is one of the better ones, which says a lot about the other gods. I blame Disney.
Your lovable drunk friend always getting drunk and into shenanigans? That person has a problem and needs help.
Source: Former lovable drunk. Now just lovable.
"Love" that's obsessive love. I'm sorry but I don't want a girl whose constantly checking up on me and asking where I am and all that crap. There has to be a balance and some people go way over the top. If you don't text back within 15 minutes they accuse you of cheating.
The whole "I just fell over, literally can't function in society!!!!" thing makes me mad; the real thing is absolutely debilitating.
The underdog mentality. Yeah, everyone loves an underdog but god damn people are too busy trying to one up each other on "I'm stronger because my past was worse".
Romance itself. So many people (myself included) expect romance and love to go down like something from a Nicholas Sparks film when in reality so so far away from that.
Based on what I've heard, Mt. Everest.
People with little to no climbing experience attempt to climb Mt. Everest because that's a cool thing that you can tell your friends about. The bottom of the mountain is clogged with people just like you. At many areas you have to wait in a line to climb a section. As you get higher the crowd will thin out, but you'll start feeling the effects of altitude sickness worse than you believed altitude sickness could be. If you hesitate or make the wrong decision then you and members of your group will likely die. Being able to say "I climbed the tallest mountain" isn't worth your life. You can probably pay people to take you up the mountain if you're hell bent on being able to say that.
Parenthood. Being a parent is really really hard, especially if your kids have special needs (and no one ever thinks it's gonna be their kids...it's gotta be someone's kids, folks).
He was a creepy jerk who bullied an entire generation of kids just because he was friendzoned by his crush.
He saved his worst for the boy he orphaned just because he looked like his dad.
Their term "always" is more creepy as he couldn't let go of his crush for 20 years even after she married another man.
He is a well written character, but not a misunderstood saint as everyone think he is.
I used to smoke everyday and I'm disgusted with myself for how much I romanticized my relationship with a plant.
Fifty Shades of Gray.
I know people who still think that's really how a BDSM relationship is, even after countless hours of people explaining it to them.
We're sold this story about how it's an honorable thing. That it's full of heroes putting themselves on the line for our freedom. You know the narrative, I won't spell it all out.
All this does is make us feel better about taking teenagers with nowhere else to go, and sending them off to die. We stop seeing those deaths as tragedies and start seeing them as honorable sacrifices. We stop recognizing the atrocities some of these people commit in foreign countries because that would taint the whole institution. And of course all this isn't for an abstract concept like "freedom"- you're just your government's weapon, and you're serving their interests.
War and anything tangenitally related are the bane of humanity. We need to stop crafting feel-good fantasies to comfort ourselves, and start dealing with the dark reality.
People who live "wine culture", you always see these people posting wine memes, pictures of ridiculous sized wine glasses, pictures of twenty bottles they picked up on sale in a cart, and do nothing but talk about when is it wine time/how much wine they drank/ we need to get together to drink wine.
I have found there is an incredibly large number of people who are romanticizing having social anxiety/no friends. The sheer amount of memes surrounding the subject has surprised me. It seems to me a lot of people have latched on to the idea of being so introverted to the point that it's crippling. However, that's not actually true for them.
Breaking up is hard to do.
And when you get the law involved, it's even worse. But sometimes people don't need the law's help to make things overcomplicated, they just have a grand ole time making that happen themselves.
People on the front lines of human cruelty include divorce lawyers. These are their stories.