Being a teacher doesn't come with a lot of perks. The pay isn't great, the hours are never-ending, and there isn't a whole lot of respect from your administration a lot of the times. On the plus side, sometimes your students will do hilarious things you can share on the internet. So, there's that.
Reddit user, u/Xshadowwolf34X, wanted to hear the best of the worst when they asked:
Just Say It Out Loud
I teach a bunch of psychology subjects at a university in Australia.
Had 2 students present a 30 minute speech on 'Ass Burgers Syndrome'
...they were in 3rd year.
Focusing On The Wrong Key Details
Taught physics to GCSE students (age ~14 ) the question began with "Explain whether or not this circuit will.....".
This student had obviously been told to highlight key words from the question and so had just highlighted the word "whether" and then wrote an answer describing that days weather and her predictions for tomorrows weather.
Old English Is Hard
In 8th grade, we were reading a section of Romeo and Juliet aloud in class. The drama was ratcheting higher, we were pouring good acting and great enthusiasm into the parts, when the Nurse discovers Juliet "dead" and wails in shock and horror:
"O lemon table day!"
So much for tragedy. The whole class cracked up.
Kind Of The Same Thing
A common mistake is Old Timer's instead of Alzheimers.
I honestly prefer the former
Some Say He Healed Them Of Their Spots
Read an essay by a middle-schooler at a Catholic school.
Learned a whole lot about the great things that Jesus did for the leopards.
Something Hard To Spell Is Hard To Speak
My wife is a teacher and a kid in 7th grade did an oral presentation on the Orin Guten......
toward the end she finally realized he was presenting on the Orangutan.
Still Technically True
A couple of days ago, a student wrote that Indiana Jones was a "forced to be wreckin' with."
Close, But Not Quite, Indeed
A student who probably meant to write "Nassi-Shneiderman-diagram" on an exam but instead wrote "Nazi-Shneiderman..." Well, it sounded German.
Close enough, but not quite.
This Sounds Like A Talk To Text ProblemGiphy
I had a student write a paper about the poetry of Emily Dickinson, but he spelled her last name as "Dick in Son" all the way through.
It was wild.
You catch more flies with honey than with vinegar, or so the saying goes.
The same can be said for your interactions with cops, most of whom are perfectly happy to let minor infractions slide––When was the last time you were actually ticketed for jaywalking?––provided you're not a total Karen should you interact them.
Your local police officer likely doesn't care about jaywalking or the fact that you went five miles over the speed limit unless you give him a reason to, as we learned when Redditor Takdel asked police officers: "What stupid law have you enforced just because someone was an a-hole?"