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Fed Up People Share Their Ex's Lamest Excuses After Being Caught Cheating

Get the cheaters out. Ain't nobody need them. They'll also do anything to cover their butts, which is gross in and of itself. But sometimes the excuses are worth a laugh.


u/so_not_a_redditor asked Reddit:

What's the lamest excuse an ex has given you after getting caught cheating?

Here were some of the answers.

The Wind, I Swear

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I went on a trip, and when I got home all of the pictures featuring me were under the bed. He told me that "the wind was blowing them around", but apparently it was only the pictures I was in, and not the posters or art inches away from them. Keep in mind, he was staying in MY apartment, and they were under MY bed.

BathingMachine

Bologna Level: Max

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One of my best friends boyfriends told her that he was sleeping with another girl so he could find out how to please a woman better. When she asked him why couldn't he just ask her, he said he didn't want to make her feel self conscious by asking her.

enterthedragynn

Anteaters Put Up A Good Fight

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He had hickeys all the way up and down his chest and neck. He told me he got in a fight. Dude, with an anteater?

IFudgedTheMath

Travelling Made Me Do It

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I travelled for business a lot, and thought I had a solid relationship. Even cleared the travel job with the wife (now ex) before I accepted. I come home one evening, she picks me up at the airport and everything seems normal. Go to bed that night, wake up in the middle of the night and she's not in bed with me. I hear headboard from next door hitting the wall that separates the bedrooms from the two apartments. 5 minutes after it stops I hear my door open, so I pretend to be asleep. She comes in and gets back into bed and snuggles up to me. Needless to say her excuse was much the same. She told me that since I was gone so much, the guy that lived next door had been hitting on her and she just couldn't resist. I left the next day.

yrreteel

Welp

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My ex in high school cheated on me twice in one weekend with the same guy (I was away for the weekend). It was a childhood friend of hers, so I didn't see it coming honestly.

The first time it "just kind of happened"

The second time she figured since she knew I was going to break up with her, she might as well do it again, "that way he tottally has to break up with his girlfriend now"

Spoiler: He didn't, but I certainly did.

Chrisbbacon312

WTF, dude?

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"I'm a Latino. It's in our blood."

He really did say that. I've dated and been friends with a lot of Latino men, he was the only one who couldn't keep it in his pants. It still disgusts me to think about it. He should be embarrassed that he ever said that.

DesertMacaroni

Ma'am, That's Incest

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"He's my half brother!" Saddest thing is she wasn't lying and she was cheating on me with her half brother who was 8 years older than her. Funniest thing is that she told me she chooses him and she was sorry... as if I'd take her back if she chose me. I joke about this story now but back then it really tore into me.

Sectaguy

Yikes

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When I caught her I actually laughed. She tried to hide under the covers. I just told the guy "I hope you can afford her". She said she cheated because he was constantly complimenting her on her looks and paying attention to her. I was working 60 hour weeks to pay for a lifestyle we couldn't afford.

vegaschevyguy

Wat

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I had caught him sexting with girls before, so the trust was pretty much gone (unfortunately I was young and dumb at the time, so I didn't immediately dump the sh-thead). Some time after, I had a feeling that something was off about him- so I took his phone when he went to the bathroom and checked his recent messages (not proud, but hey: he reacted abnormally defensive when I tried to talk and I was desperate). First conversation was with a random girl he met online, sexting, sending nudes, discussing when the were going to meet up... And within 3 minutes I found tons of similar conversations, one of them with my best friend. Yelled at him, cried, kicked him out. His response? "It was just a test. Those girls are only friends, I wanted to see if you trusted me enough not to check my phone- Those convos are all fake!" Needless to say I didn't believe him. After he realised I wasn't going to believe him, he told me it was my fault because I was an annoying girlfriend.

Yelled "Well then you must be happy that I'm dumping you!" and closed the door.

SjonnieAnastasia

I'm Not Buying This

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"But I was thinking of you the whole time!" followed by, "We both [she and guy she cheated on me with] agreed that if y'all [me and guy she cheated with's girlfriend] ever cheated, we would want you to do it with each other!" That's supposed to make me feel better? WTF.

GiantLakeOfire

Caught

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Mine just refused to admit that she was cheating.

She decided that she didn't need me anymore (bit of a story there) but instead of leaving me she just started cheating. The guy was someone who she used to work with but got fired from the bookstore.

She and I were mid 20s but this guy was mid 30s, unemployed, no degree or job skills or training (hence being mid 30s working in and getting fired from a bookstore), a big smoker (which she said that she could never date), and MARRIED. She knew that he was married. He knew that she was engaged to me.

I worked midnights at a job which was 75% of our income. So I slept during the day. His wife worked during the day to support both of them. So when I was sleeping and his wife was at work they did their thing. She'd drive over to meet him after his wife left, they did their thing, and made sure to get him home before his wife and she got back before I woke up.

But, nope. She denied cheating. She didn't want me anymore, was sneakily spending as much time as possible alone with him and lying to me about where she was which is how I caught her, and leaving me for him, but according to her she totally wasn't cheating on me with him.

Zediac

Digging A Hole

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One of my best friends is going through a divorce, and after catching his wife in the act AFTER finding damning evidence, her excuses were "I don't remember it," then "I must've been like, sleepwalking," then "I thought we said we could have an open marriage?" and finally blamed it on him for making her work. Because "if you'd just let me be a stay at home mom, this would've never happened."

FAHRENHEIT_311

Where Do You Come Up With This?

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"They came over and wouldn't leave until we did it! "

One of my ex's when she had a threesome..I literally laughed out loud and hung up the phone, she called a week later ( when her parents got back in town) while I was at work and stupid me answered without looking at who called.. She told me she couldn't call me because he took her phone and said she could only get it back by giving him endless BJs but she was sorry blah blah blah... It was long distance at this point in time so I just hung up without saying a word blocked her number. She was crazy... I called her dad and told him and she got some help but yeah, bullet dodged there.

bra1ntra1n

Sigh

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I am a gay guy and the excuse he gave was :

"You haven't had sex with me in a month. Plus that day you refused to go out on a date with me. You hurt my feelings"

Now some context:

The day this dude was referring to was a WEEK after my Dad's funeral . Later that evening after leaving my place he went to the local hair salon and f***ed the hairstylist.

In the final months of his life my father was extremely weak and had to be hospitalized . This ex was upset that I didn't f*** him as I was too busy spending time with my dying father.

PrinceRedViper

Unfair Assumptions

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Never been cheated on, but my wife was cheated on by her first husband.

His reasoning was that he thought she was already cheating on him, which she wasn't.

This probably isn't the kind of insane, funny, or plain stupid reason you are looking for, but it always made me pissed off at him.

Moonpaw

Who Exactly Are You Hurting

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So most people in a relationship, or at least starting one, would probably just turn you down if you wanted to date them. But not this gal I knew. The worst thing is we were friends before this. We were pals from the same circle of friends, had been to several of eachothers' birthdays and holidays. Some how after a night of hanging out it was just her and I, at an all night diner because neither of us could sleep. We talked and eventually I asked her out. We went on some dates, ya-da ya-da. Then on a double date she gets mad at me and jealous of another friend because he has breathing issues so I asked her if it's fine if he sits in the front of my little mitsubishi eclipse because he's tall as f*** and can't fit back there, and she's all pouty and quiet for the rest of the date (which was a soccer game, I don't even watch soccer but her and my friend and his gf did).

This led to receiving the cold shoulder from her. I figured "I'm an adult. I dont need this", so after not getting replies I stopped trying. I speak to one of our other friends in the group, I find out the whole time we've been dating (not that long, like a month or two) and before, she's been talking to some other guys and their relationships were more serious.

I don't bring any of this up and she still doesn't know I knew because I didn't wanna ruin their friendship, but that weekend is one of our friend's birthdays and of course she's there. We have a talk and she apologizes about her behavior towards me and my friend and that she wants to try again. I just told her I'd think about it. Haven't spoken to her since.

Now the new thing that drives me up the wall even more is that she still randomly talks to my roommate from back then and asks how I'm doing and how she "really liked me" and wished we could have kept going. Just the lack of respect she showed towards me, for not warning me that she's already seeing 3-4 other guys before wasting my time, assuming she was my friend before all this, that's what sickens me.

If you read this far, thanks for letting me rant. My gf just moved out (not broke up but she moved to another city and I'm stuck here for another month) and I have a lot frustrations with no outlet.

Xspartantac0X

Have you ever found yourself in an argument so stupid and/or pointless that you were sure you were being punked? Like you keep looking away from the other person to check your surroundings for places Ashton Kutcher and a camera crew could come popping out of?

You're not the only one.

u/Anti-hollowkid asked: What is the dumbest argument you've ever been in?

Brace yourselves, folks. Some of these arguments are breathtakingly bonkers. The sheer number of people who are willing to argue with someone over provable facts and what that other person likes or doesn't like is just ... stunning. It's stunning, you guys. Just not in a good way.

I Know What I Like

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My wife and I once argued over whether or not I liked mustard on my hot dog. I was for me liking mustard, she was against me liking mustard.

The argument lasted way longer that you could ever imagine it would.

- AardvarkAndy

A Stair Step

My brother and I argued if our staircase had 13 or 14 steps, based on an argument about if the floor of the second floor counts as a stair-step or not. We still have no solution.

- RazerWolf04

My dad is a stairbuilder and I spent many summers working at his warehouse, so I can clear this up. 14.

- Apples9308

Saturdays

My husband and I have this thing where we only say "I love you" on Saturdays. Every other day it's "I love you, but only on Saturdays." I don't know how it started, but it's been going for 11 years now.

We're both shiftworkers, so sometimes we have to stop and think what day it actually is. We had an argument recently over whether it was Saturday or not. I said it was Saturday, he said it was Friday. It was Monday.

- FormalMango

Iraq

I remember when I was about 13 my parents had an hour-long shouting match that ended with them almost getting divorced. The issue? Whether or not the nation of Iraq has a coastline.

My mother arguing that Iraq had a coastline, while my stepdad argued that it did not. This was back in 2004, and they are still quite happily married to this day. That incident is something they look back on and laugh about, and both of them admit it was really a pretty stupid thing to argue over.

- dontcryformegiratina

$40

With an ex:

"I owe you $80 for the bills of ours that you pay, and you owe me $40 for the bills of ours that I paid. Here's $40 in cash; we're even."

She did not understand this.

I literally had to go get another $40 out of the ATM, and hand the $80 to her. Then I had her hand me the $40 she owed me.

"Now how much do you have in your hand?"

She still didn't understand.

She somehow has a college degree.

- Speedly

Mini Wheats

When we were kids my brother and I got in a physical fight because he said I like mini wheats and I insisted I didn't. His argument was that I always sang the mini wheats song and I was deeply offended that he wasn't aware that it was just stuck in my head but I hated the cereal. I actually did like the cereal I'm not sure why I was arguing with him about it but I remember how genuinely angry I was.

- shicole3

Crayons

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I'll tell you about the only legal trouble I've ever been in, the fight that got me arrested. It started over whether we should return a box of crayons or not, and to this day I don't have any idea how it escalated to the point of the cops being called, but they were and I was the one taken in.

- CorrectionalChard

That's Unfair

My boyfriend insisted that when two people are in an argument and one makes a point so reasonable and logical the other one can't disagree with it - it's unfair. I tried, logically and reasonably, to explain several times why that is just winning the argument, proving your point thoroughly and is completely fair.

His answer was that I was being unfair.

- ShyAcorn

Pure Masochism

How the ch in masochism is pronounced. My friend caught me saying "masoKism" while he would say "masoSYism."

To be fair, he grew up speaking French, in which the ch in masochism is pronounced in "his" way. But he insisted that I was the wrong one here and that was just infuriating.

- argofire

Emailing NASA

A woman was adamant that looking at the big solar eclipse on the television was unsafe unless you were wearing glasses. She wouldn't believe us and insisted on emailing NASA to check.

- derawin07

A Non-Standard Ruler? 

I worked for a company that made signs. We had a customer ask for signs that were 7mm wide that were to go on a door. Our sign makers figured the order meant inches because 7mm is pretty small, so made them 7 inches. I got a phone call from the customer who went mad at me for making them the wrong size. So I put a reorder through for 7 mm.

Argued with the sign makers over it but they eventually agreed to do it after I shown them the order in writing. I even had the customer put her complaint in writing, reiterating the size they wanted.

7mm signs went out and a day later I get the customer on the phone literally screaming at me.

Cue the dumb argument - we ended up having an argument over how big a millimetre is, and obviously everyone in the office were laughing, but this customer just wouldn't accept it and said we must be using a non-standard ruler to measure.

Ended up being escalating to the sales department manager who refused to issue a refund. We still don't know what they actually meant.

- Lovelocke

This Unusual Vegan Argument

Was in a pub with a few friends, and some random Dude dropped an ear, and somehow figured I'm vegan. Well, people like him are the reason I usually avoid mentioning it. He came up to me and insisted on starting a discussion about veganism. He claimed that by the end of it, I would be eating meat again.

He listed some stupid arguments, I told him I was not convinced and then tried to keep on drinking beer with my friends. He followed me, and wanted me to "try to convert him to a vegan." I stupidly listed some of my reasons thinking it would make him go away. He told me he still was not convinced, so I was like whatever. Again, I really just wanted to drink beer with my friends.

That dude followed me all night and expected me to try make him vegan. Doesn't matter what I said, and all the reasons that for me are obviously good enough to be vegan. He'd be just like "No, that doesn't convince me, therefore your argument and how you life is stupid."

Didn't matter how often I told him that I honestly don't care; 5 minutes later he would come up to me again "I'm still not vegan, so veganism is stupid, all your arguments were stupid, now give me a good reason to become vegan!" At one point, I was literally yelling at him that I don't give a single flying f about what he eats and why, that it's in no way my responsibility to "turn somebody vegan" and in no way his business what I eat.

Honestly, for that dude, I would have bought a whole ham, just to shove it up his stupid annoying face.

- onlytruebertos

Monty Python

In college my roommate and I argued about a line in Monty Python & the Holy Grail. The scene with the Black Knight where the line "Alright, we'll call it a draw" is uttered. We argued about who said that line, whether it was King Arthur or the Black Knight.

It went on for hours longer than it should have because I was stubborn and refused to admit I was wrong.

- Skrivus

Albert or Arnold

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Whether Albert Einstein or Arnold Schwarzenegger would be more useful to have around during a Zombie apocalypse. How on earth would Albert Einstein come in handy!?

- Gerrard1995

Below Sea Level

I live on an island and when you go upland and you look out the sea looks like it's higher than or on the same level as the land. It's just a weird perspective thing because of the horizon. One day some kid says that it's because the island is under sea level.


I'm like wtf bro all of us would be with the fishes. He argues that no that's not true and if I just go upland I'll see. We then spend a good 5 minutes of my time arguing about it until I decided to leave this kid in his stupidity. He even said we shouldn't believe everything adults tell us and sometimes we need to think for ourselves.

This kid was older than me and was going to a good school. Lost my respect for him ever since then.

- -justforclout-

Tomash

Someone tried to fight with me over how to spell my name.

Now, my name is in a lot of languages with slightly different spellings. I would have accepted any of those spellings, but this one was just... Not even close. It didn't make any logical sense.


An analogous example is if my name was Thomas and someone was insisting it was spelled Tomash. And not just the name Thomas in general, but that me specifically, on my birth certificate, was named Tomash. I know how to spell my own name.

I swear to god, it went on for like an hour.

- TK-DuVeraun

Whales Are Mammals

I was in an online chat room one day, and we were talking about whales. I commented on how whales are mammals and the next thing you know, someone was arguing with me and trying to convince me that a whale was a fish.

- kawaii_psycho451

Microwaves

Stupid microwaves. Having a man child talk down to me about how microwaves work only for him to google it and prove me right. He slept on the sofa that night.

- sun_phobic

Shower Schedule

My friend keeps telling me that the norm is that a person should shower once a week. This has been going on for years. I'm almost convinced he's trolling me.

- LibrarianGovernment

No Balloons For Grandma

My cousin and I argued over a balloon going to Heaven. We were at his big sisters prom send off and he let a balloon go and it went high into the sky.

He then said this balloon will go up past space and go to Heaven and reach grandma (God rest her soul). And I was like no it's not and it's probably not even gonna reach space. Releasing balloons is terrible for the environment and kills/harms so much wildlife.

He got really mad and defensive and started telling me to google it and do my research and I'm like I don't have to google it you idiot. He was mad at me for a good week.

- Dskee02

Spontaneous Dolphin Existence

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How dolphins reproduced. It took me a few solid minutes of explaining to her that dolphins have reproductive organs and that they did not just pop into existence. The argument began with her saying she wanted to work with sea creatures.

Personally, I hope she was messing with me cause I lost a little faith in humanity that day.

- thebeststory

Male Chickens

I repeatedly had the argument with a friend over whether roosters were chickens. She was convinced that only the females were chickens (hens). We were 18 at the time.

- bee_zah

Lightning McQueen

Me and my friend were drinking underage, we ended up in an argument of whether lightning McQueen's eyes were blue or green. Somehow throughout the whole thing both of us never thought to straight up google a picture.

- 23071115

But ... Ice Floats

Waiter/Host here.

Woman wanted ice on the bottom of her drink.

Now read that sentence again and try to imagine arguing with that particular brand of stupid.

- FarWoods

Time Zones Exist

Coworker claimed that it was the same time of day and the same season on the whole globe. Had to get 4 coworkers to confirm to him that time zones do in fact exist.

- JustARegularToaster

Colorblind

My brother is colorblind. And he CONSTANTLY tries to correct me on what color things are.

"Hey could you hand me that red _____?"

"that's orange"

"no, it's red"

"orange"

"YOU CANT EVEN KNOW"

It is the base of our most common and heated arguments.

- droneb2hive

Andre 2000?

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I'm late, but I saw this question and instantly remembered that I was booted from a Facebook group because I called someone out on a lie that was not only bull, but extremely pointless. She was friends with the moderator and they made the case that my argument over such a little lie was more of a problem than the lie itself (though they didn't refer to it as a lie.)


The woman said that she used to babysit for Andre 3000 and that his name was Andre 2000 - but he changed it after the year 2000 had passed. This was so easily disproven it was ridiculous. Their debut album came out in 1994 and he was already going by Andre 3000 at that time.

The argument wasn't a huge long drawn out thing, but the fact that either of us were on Facebook at separate times meant that the responses were over a long period of time so this argument lasted a few days.

It was stupid.

- P1ST0L_Wh1PP3D

Stars Like Our Sun

I was arguing with my grandpa about stars he didn't believe that there are other stars like our sun. Basically he thought there is only the sun, the moon and the earth.

fox_boi2

Richard Nixon

I have a degree in history. I mostly focused on nationalism. Wrote a 50 page paper on it and Richard Nixon with around 50 100 sources. Looked at micro film for hours on end. Part of the paper focused on how Nixon being chair of the house committee of Unamerican Activities was used as a powerful weapon to use against political enemies. It also inspired Joe McCarthy. Have had people tell me I was wrong and Nixon was never elected to a position besides the president and Joe McCarthy came before Nixon. I stopped trying to talk history to people.


I also know quite a bit about the history of the Balkans its amazing how many Serbs refuse to believe Tito did anything wrong.

Wrote 100 page paper on nationalism in Israel. Its frustrating to talk about because for some reason a lot of people think Palestinian firing rockets randomly into Israel is ok but if Israel retaliates the people get up in arms over a targeted air strike that kills 3 people.

grumblecakes1

Balloon to Heaven

My cousin and I argued over a balloon going to Heaven. We were at his big sisters prom send off and he let a balloon go and it went high into the sky. He then said this balloon will go up past space and go to Heaven and reach grandma (God rest her soul). And I was like no it's not and it's probably not even gonna reach space.

And he got really mad and defensive and started telling me to google it and do my research and I'm like I don't have to google it you idiot. He was mad at me for a good week.

Dskee02

Binder Clips

I got into an argument with a co-worker over how we were attaching two pages of a letter together: small binder clips or paper clips.

He felt that paper clips would leave a "dent" in the paper when removed, but binder clips won't. He refused to staple them together. I felt that binder clips would also leave a "dent", so we might as well just use the paper clips.

It ended with him saying: "Do what you want [me], I don't care!" and storming off.

justantherredditgirl

Jewish

Once got accused of faking being Jewish. Why? I have no clue. We argued over the course of a month, any time I'd bring it up and she heard about it, she'd begin going after me for "faking it".

My mother's side is ethnically Jewish. Grandparents were practicing.

Aslkurloz

Nutella

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3 friends and I once got into an argument about how to pronounce Nutella. It lasted for about 3-4 months. It was hilarious how serious we took it, it'd get heated but never for real serious.

I think someone even called the company that made it to check, or that may have been for the Cheetos company. We were really bored in high school.

vault_tec_redditor

Lingerie Boxes

Late to the party, but there it is.

I'm a manager at a small store. We're only 4 working there, so my team and I grew very close and we joke around a lot. Once during a slow shift, my employee and I had an argument because we were looking at the lingerie boxes, and I thought that two specific boxes had the same woman on it, but she was 100% positive they weren't the same person.

Looking back, I don't know why it was such a big deal to us at the time, but we even called another employee who lives across the street to come and tell us what the heck was up with that. Turns out I was right, and she was pretty salty about it. It was a great night.

Meh75

Wicked Witch of the West

I almost got into an argument with an old girlfriend over Glinda the good witch from Oz. She insisted that Glinda was manipulating Dorothy to assassinate the Wicked Witch of the West and convince the Wizard to leave to create a political void she could fill.

I conceded the issue when I heard the whole premise because I thought it was too damn stupid to get worked up over.

weirdatwork2017

Keep Your Hands to Yourself

Just the other day I legit got in an argument with my co-workers on why I don't like my butt being grabbed by anyone (I'm a guy). Seriously.

They went on about "I don't mind it. Mike and I do it all the time and we don't care." Yeah, that's nice dude, but I'm not you, and there's something called "Keep your hands to yourself" (which was taught to a good portion of us growing up). Just like how Karen wouldn't like it if I touched her boobs or her grabbing your crotch or frankly ANY area you wouldn't like being grabbed, keep away. In general, you should not be touching me in any areas after I've told you not to several times before.

So unless you're sleeping me or dating me, keep your damn hands off my toosh.

Frisby2007

Telekinesis

My best friend and I argued over whether or not telekinesis was possible. Her argument was that humans don't yet know what the human brain at 100% usage was capable of, and that telekinesis was inside the possibilities.

I said the brain does use 100%, just at different times.

We didn't speak to each other for four days.

dude_bizarro

Ghosts

How dolphins reproduced and whether or not ghost existed (back to back with the same person). It took me a few solid minutes of explaining to her that dolphins have reproductive organs and that they did not just pop into existence (the argument began with her saying she wanted to work with sea creatures).


How it shifted to the existence of ghosts is a solid and reasonable question to ask (I don't remember why). I had to then proceed to tell her that ghost hunting TV shows do not constitute as undeniable evidence.

Personally, I hope she was messing with me cause I lost a little faith in humanity that day. This was in high school SO... hopefully she was kidding.

thebeststory

Dogs and Chocolate

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I told this stupid woman that chocolate is toxic to dogs. She went on to tell me how a little bit will just make them hyper and then they will calm down. I told her to google it. Her and her bf shut right up. Now they have a kid. Good luck, Jeremy and Andrea. morons.

I should also add that this argument started because Jeremy was giving his tiny dog chocolate and I told him it was toxic.

KlutzyHedgehog

Is water wet?

My roommate and I have a recurring argument over whether or not water is wet l, and whether or not a person is considered wet underwater.

For the record, it is no to both questions.

SFCopperhead

Mission Trip

A kid a church telling me about the mission trip I went on. Not only was I not on that trip, but I had never been on any mission trip. We were good friends, so it's not like he would've mistaken someone else for me.

He insisted I was there as if an entire week long trip would just fall out of my memory. He even had stories of things we'd done together. I'm not sure if he thought I was lying, joking, stupid, or crazy, but I was pretty sure he was some combination thereof.

SirRogers

Dragon Tales

One time I got into a shouting match with my mom and little brother in the car. The issue? The names of the two-headed dragon from the PBS kids afternoon show Dragon Tales. I swore it was Zack and Macie.

It was actually Zak and Wheezie. I don't even remember why we were yelling about it.

MistalQueensglaive

Green Or Yellow?

When I was about 15 or so my mother and I spent about 20-30 minutes arguing about the color of a shirt. We agreed it was blue/green, but to me it was just a shade more blue, while to her it was just a bit more green.

Turns out, your eyeballs yellow as you age and hers were 24 years yellower than mine, so I think that skewed her color vision.

BugsRatty

Stars In Their Multitude

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I once got in an argument over whether or not a line from the song "Stars" in Les Mis says "...but mine is the way of the lord" or "mine is the way of the law".

I didn't even really care what he thought but he was so adamant and cocky that it got me heated. By the end of it we were shouting at each other and I had to apologize, which I think is what he wanted the whole time.

theedjman

Colorblind

My brother is colorblind. And he CONSTANTLY tries to correct me on what color things are.

"Hey could you hand me that red _____?" "that's orange" "no, it's red" "orange" "YOU CANT EVEN KNOW".

It is the base of our most common and heated arguments.

droneb2hive

Hot Water

About five years ago, my girlfriend (now wife) once had a very intense argument about whether or not hot water cleaned things better than cold water.

She genuinely believed that water temperature didn't matter. This is someone who has not one, but two masters degrees.

We argued for something like 2 hours, and we seriously almost broke up over the whole thing.

moniker5000

Biology Class

I had an argument with a girl IN THE MIDDLE OF A BIOLOGY CLASS in high school about how humans are not mammals. She thought a human was a human and we are not mammals because "mammals are animals and humans are not animals"

I tried explaining to her the difference between reptiles and mammals and how humans fall under the mammal category to try and educate her... but she just wouldn't listen.

I still have no idea why the BIOLOGY teacher did not get involved...

10d4plus8

Solid Or Liquid?

Some classmates and I got into a heated debate as to whether or not the human body could count as a soup, salad, or sandwich. The teacher got mad at us, but hey! All we were doing was watching a movie.

For the record, my logic lays with soup- Liquid contained within a solid, at a hot temperature.

ScreamingPotoo