Mall Santas Reveal The Creepiest Things Kids Have Asked For
Mall Santas get all sorts of gift requests, and some of them are rather odd. Others, though, are sad, and true to their characters, many mall Santas act as heroes for kids in need.
Submissions have been edited for clarity, context, and profanity.
I have been Santa for several seasons, I had a special needs young woman (approximate age of 40, emotional of 12 perhaps) ask me to make her boyfriend quit hurting her. I told a lady who was helping me to get the deputy sheriff at the event to come see me. I whispered to him what she had said. He came back 10 minutes later and asked if I would speak to her in a private area.
In May the deputy let me know girl had been relocated to new care facility.
My dad plays Santa for the community every year. A little girl once asked for a nicer daddy.
No he cannot.Giphy
My boyfriend is a Santa for private events, and has been doing it for over 20 years, so he has a BUNCH of stories.
He was doing a private adults-only party, so all of the ladies were being a bit flirty, but nothing crazy. "Santa Baby" started playing and the ladies dragged him onto the dance floor. He shimmies a bit and goes to sit back down when a woman grabs him and starts grinding on him. He tries to get away from her in character ("What will Mama Claus think?" Etc...), but she keeps on grinding. Finally, the hostess notices and gets her away from him, but she kept trying to get to him the rest of the night.
The saddest story was definitely when a little kid (4 or 5) crawled into his lap and, with a big, sweet smile, asked Santa
"Can you make my mommy love me?"
My BF has to hug the kid so he wouldn't see him tearing up and told him that that was a request for a higher power and that he and Mama Claus would pray about it. Kid seemed happy with that response.
Mom robs her own kid for cigarette money.Giphy
Kid came in and wanted nothing except for a Matchbox car. He told me how every week he heard his mom sneak into his bedroom and take the pocket money (that she had given him) to buy cigarettes. I felt so terrible for him that I gave him 3-4 different presents, rather than just 1.
They've been naughty grannies.Giphy
My dad plays a mall Santa and I used to be the photographer. Watching the older women flirt with my dad was highly uncomfortable then creepy.
I was Santa for corporate holiday parties one year. I was in my 30's but used a spray for my beard. Looked lifelike, Kids dug it, so did one mom/aunt who threw a kid off my lap (hers, I hope) and whispered that she wanted Santa to have sex with her from behind while pulling her hair. She didn't seem to be drunk. I was very uncomfortable... Then the meeting planner told me she does that every year.
Daddy went to get milk.Giphy
My uncle was a mall Santa for a while.
He said that the worst thing he was asked for by a child was "Can you get daddy to come home?"
He also had quite a few kids tug on his beard (which was a real beard) to verify that he was actually Santa.
Years ago, I was in line with my 6-year-old nephew for his visit with Santa. When Santa asked my nephew what he wanted for Christmas, he said, "Could you get Mommy and Daddy some pajamas? Cuz they don't wear any...." The whole line broke up, including Santa.
People do eat reindeer.Giphy
I think the worst thing a kid ever asked for was some reindeer sausage. He figured Santa could slaughter one of his reindeer for the venison.
"It wasn't me!"
There's not much you can do when the righteous fist of the law comes down on you. Call it a mix-up, or call it a mistake, if someone's pegged you at the scene of a crime there's not much you can do but trust the justice system to prove you innocent. However, that's a gamble, and just because you've been given a "not guilty" doesn't mean the effects won't follow you for the rest of your life.
Reddit user, u/danbrownskin, wanted to hear about the times when it wasn't you, seriously, it was someone else, when they asked: