People Share The Most Childish Thing They've Seen A Grown Adult Do

I once dated a guy who tried to tell me I couldn't step outside because it was his outside. Like, buddy literally looked at me and stomped, folded his arms, pouted and went "Ugh, this is MY outsiiiiiiide!" The whiny childishness in that moment was a hell of an eye opener, I gotta say.

I expected that behavior from my nephews, or the kids I worked with at the elementary school, but to see a man in his late 30's/early 40's bust that out was ... well... I almost lied to you guys right there and said it was shocking. It totally wasn't. I had experienced a few doozies with this dude already. It was pretty public knowledge he was a very tall toddler. A few of his friends warned me, but I'm stubborn. I think that moment made me suddenly realize they warned me for a reason.

You know the way lightbulbs are dim and shaky when they're not screwed all the way in, but as soon as you do it immediately is a bright, strong light? Yeah. I very suddenly and clearly realized things were never going to work out. That tantrum made sure I was illuminated AF. Lightbulb.


One Reddit user asked:

What's the most childish thing you've seen a grown adult do?

and there are so many "this is MY outside" moments here that it's honestly a wonder to me how more people don't get kicked in the shins. I'm going to go ahead and slap a "terrible parents" note on this one. Because WOW terrible parents. Some of these have been edited for clarity or language, but I made sure to leave all the childishness on full display. Enjoy the tantrums.

Baby Candy

At one theater I worked at, we had a large Tub of popcorn, large drink combo deal in which you'd get a free bag of skittles and we had to push it on every customer. One day I get an older customer who gets the combo but then suddenly explodes at me because, as he put it, the FREE bag of skittles he received was too small. He kept referring it as a "baby candy".

Manager comes right over and intervenes. Customer starts yelling about "This is a baby's candy....do I look like a baby to you?!", which would've been a prime opportunity for me to put in my two cents but I needed to have a job, so I kept it to myself. Irate customer then pulled the "I'm going to tell everyone I know not to come here and buy your candy" bit.

Again, the candy was FREE.

- MortimerToKill


A lot of stories of these responses are people throwing tantrums, but honestly my first thought was of my dad and my partner. They didn't throw tantrums - they were childish together in a sweet way. The second or third time they met, they ended up having an incredibly convoluted sword fight with baguettes.

- cosmogoinggoinggone

Ariel Is Absolutely A Princess, BTW


I worked in the Walmart bakery one summer during college. A woman called up requesting a Disney princess cake be made for her daughter's birthday that day - it didn't matter what princess, just any Disney princess. We made a little mermaid cake with Ariel on it. Husband comes to pick it up, pays for it, it's fine. About 10 minutes later a very belligerent and angry wife (overweight, appears mid 40's maybe) comes back with the cake screaming at everyone in the bakery "THIS IS NOT A DISNEY PRINCESS!"

She's hysterical, throwing a tantrum and harassing everyone in the bakery about how it's not the cake she wanted, not the princess she wanted. "ARIEL IS NOT A PRINCESS" The manager of the Walmart ends up getting involved as this woman is making a HUGE scene and we can't calm her down. She ends up getting that cake for free as well as another Disney princess cake made to her liking.

- temporarycarrot


My 25 year old brother likes to do this thing where he screams at you to shut up, then gets upset when you aren't "participating in the conversation."

- RosyalynTheRed

Burger King Breakfast

Pissed that the Burger King was still on the breakfast menu for the next seven minutes, the uninsured driver threw her illegally-"borrowed" boyfriend's truck in reverse (to hell with her toddler sitting unbuckled on the passenger's lap) and slammed the gas to exit the drive-thru

...and crashed right onto the hood of my car WTF?!

She was not an insured driver, but her boyfriend was really great about it and HIS insurance paid in full. The kid did get a little booboo. I'm presuming he's her EX boyfriend now considering she stole and crashed his car over a Whopper or something.

- theTenebrus

Little League Lightning Storm

I remember back when I was 10 I played baseball. I had been doing so for years at that point. Our team that year was the best in our league at the time. My dad was the team manager and it was a great time doing it every year before we stopped.

Well at the end of the year we had a double elimination tournament between every team. It came down to it and both my team and the last remaining team were both undefeated so we had to play two games to get a winner. The first game we fucking smoked them. The score was like 9-1.

A couple days later we're into the second game and it's looking like the same outcome. The manager of the other team is getting worked up I guess and says he sees lightning out of nowhere. Since it was policy to call off the game due to lightning cause of safety and all we waited it out for 10 minutes to see what happened. It was nothing so my dad goes out to see if we can keep going with the game and the other teams manager storms out and is calling him a piece of shit, asshole, etc. after we start back up he says he sees some again and I guess some of the other kids parents on that team went with it. They ended up calling the game off and both teams were declared co champions. F*ck you Matt we would've won that and you know it.

- jokester150

Menstrual Photo Op

When I didn't want to be in a photo because my first period bled through my white shorts. My dad threw a massive temper tantrum and was red in the face screaming and shouting, drawing a huge crowd and holding up the queue for the photo spot. I, the child, had to tell him he was making a scene and holding up the line.

- Raichu7

Abandoned At A Golf Course


My mom, step-dad, and I went to a local par 3 golf course. For those that don't know this is a much smaller golf course where all of the holes can be reached in one or two hits. So kind of between mini golf and actual golf. Either way, we are playing and my step-dad is playing poorly. He had brought out his $400 full set of clubs and my mom and I were both using the clubs provided at the course.

My mom is winning by a stroke or two and hits the ball and it ends up on the ground an inch from a tree. She nudges it a little bit away so that she doesn't hit the tree and my step-dad loses it. Like really goes nuts about how she was cheating.

He ends up throwing his ball into the woods and walking to the car. My mom and I continued playing because, f--- that, we were still having fun. Next thing we know we hear an engine revving and watch our ride do a burn out out of the parking lot. We had to call my biological dad and have him pick us up and drop us off at my step-dads place because he had gone home and wouldn't answer the phone.

- ReccoR2

May As Well Be Dead

My father used to break into noisy, dramatic tears when he figured he wasn't getting his way or getting enough attention.

If, during this performance, you didn't immediately fawn all over him, dripping apologies and praise, he'd storm off in a huff and threaten suicide because 'no one loved him so he may as well be dead.'

This was at least a weekly occurrence growing up. Ah, the joys of living with an emotionally stunted narcissist.

I finally stood up to his manipulation when I was 12 or 13. He stopped trying that crap with me and now we have a decent, although somewhat distant, relationship. Pretty sure he still does it with his other kids and current partner though.

- Scorch1121

The Bridezilla Show

One of my friends worked at a pastry chef at a bakery when she was first starting up. She had a bridezilla come in to order a wedding cake and they told her that they were booked solid that week and couldn't accommodate, but could give the order to another shop that might be able to help. She started to complain and then yell and scream and literally fell to the floor, kicking and screaming.

While this was going on, one of the employees started to load another wedding cake onto a cart to take out to the van. Bridezilla jumped up and pushed the cake off the cart and then stepped on it. She then stormed out and sped off.

The owner had to call the wedding party and explain that their extravagant cake was just destroyed by a crazy bridezilla. She had another cake that would serve everyone, but it wouldn't be decorated as nicely. Luckily, they were okay with it... With the stipulation that they got a copy of the camera footage.

She made a copy of the footage and delivered it along with the replacement cake. The couple showed it at the reception and it was a huge hit at the party.



When I used to work in fast food, I had a manager who was a bit older than me, early to mid 20s. Anyway, I was taking a customer's order in drive thru, and she started repeating everything I said. Literally what I would expect of a 7 year old. I asked her at least 10 times to stop because she was being unbearably childish, and still she wouldn't listen. I couldn't hear people's orders over her parroting in my ear. Finally I had to get a different manager, and just felt dumb having to complain about another manager acting that way.

- anorganizedanarchist

The Piano Tantrum


Many, many things my uncle does. The most recent reason that he's not speaking to my parents (my mum is his sister) is that he wanted their help moving a piano.

He'd ordered this piano and was waiting to hear when it would be delivered. I think he'd vaguely mentioned it to my parents. Anyway, he got the delivery date, rang up my dad and straight up just told him that my dad would be helping to move this piano.

My dad: 'Okay, that should be fine. Let me just check my diary to confirm... Oh no, turns out my car is having work done that day so I won't be able to get there and [your sister] will be at work. Sorry.'

My uncle: *screams profanities and insists that we have never helped him and no one ever helps him and the whole world is against him* *hangs up the phone* *doesn't speak to us for months*

- -joiedevivre

MY Vacation

We are passholders at Disney World, so I have seen a lot of sh*t over the years. Grown women pushing their small kids out of the way to meet a character is always in the top 10.

The best fit I've ever seen was a grown ass man who had the audacity to say "Why are there so many people here? This is MY vacation." in line at Guest Relations. Dude....it is a theme park open year-round to the masses. You will never be the only person there. When he was leaving the building, my dad went to him:
"Sorry we and everyone else here ruined your vacation."

He didn't say anything back, just gave my dad a death-glare.

- mah009

Daddy Issues

My 51 year old father cried about me 'not wanting to see him'

My dad separated from my mum when I was 2 and he now lives across state. He comes to town once in a blue moon and has only once given me more than 2 days of warning. He claims that's my fault because I don't message him every day for updates. One year, he showed up on my birthday with no warning. I already had plans, but I was willing to make time for him to come meet me. I just didn't have space in my schedule to go meet him. He refused to come to meet me instead of vice versa

Now, when I say cry I mean a full blown tantrum with angry texts like: 'well I guess you don't love me then' and 'my own daughter cant be bothered to see me when I drive all this way'. He then proceeded to go to the bar and cry to his friends about how his own daughter doesn't love him.

I work 2 jobs now and I have very little free time. It's Australia Day tomorrow and I promised my friend I'd spend it with her and her family after my shift at work. My dad messaged me 4 hours ago saying he was in town for just tomorrow and wanted to see me. I now have to completely reschedule, or risk a repeat of his tantrums. So, nothing has changed.

- Fiyachan

Bag Of Clothes

I couldn't do a return for a customer because she didn't have the receipt. After much back and forth and speaking to the manager she got so angry that she threw her bag of clothes at us and purposefully knocked over a couple of stacks of shirts while storming out of the store.

She came back 30 minutes later to get that bag of clothes back.

- notamonth

A Couple Licks

My husband and I have a few dogs. One tends to be less affectionate than the others. He literally put himself in a bad mood because the less affectionate dog gave me a couple of licks when we were all playing together, but not my husband...

- Wimbly512


My mom deleted her Facebook because a coworker unfriended her.

- peachyweach

Good Golly Miss Molly

I worked for restaurant that was 50's themed. They had the awesome old school coca cola plaques... the whole shebang so you can clearly see what you're walking into. Dude comes in with his wife they order, pick up their food and sit down. 5-10 minutes later dude is up at the counter pissed demanding that the music station be changed and play Christian rock because the music is offensive. Good Golly Miss Molly was playing.

We explain that we have no control over it and that the music is meant to play into the whole 1950's theme, and that the only way to have the song change is to put money in the jukebox and pick songs. Well he goes on a profanity-filled rant, claiming that were excluding him because of religious beliefs that he's calling the city. Then he goes over to the table, dumps all his food on it, smears it around with his hands and leaves.

What I found hilarious was that his face was covered in gang tattoos, he had "die motherf*cker" and a gun tattooed on his neck. His wife had a big cross tattooed in between her breasts. I normally wouldn't know this, but she was wearing a tube top 3 sizes too small so everyone could see everything. The south side of Chicago can be really classy sometimes.

- glowNdarkFish



My mother kicked my kids out of her house on Christmas day because my 7 year old disagreed about the rules of Yahtzee.

- AmandaTwisted


I had a friend at University with an incredibly jealous girlfriend. I kind of understood because he and I did date for a very short time, but it was long over. His girlfriend was really petty about it, though. She wouldnt let him use my name. He had to call me "It" when she was nearby.

- rhuxinabox

Have you ever found yourself in an argument so stupid and/or pointless that you were sure you were being punked? Like you keep looking away from the other person to check your surroundings for places Ashton Kutcher and a camera crew could come popping out of?

You're not the only one.

u/Anti-hollowkid asked: What is the dumbest argument you've ever been in?

Brace yourselves, folks. Some of these arguments are breathtakingly bonkers. The sheer number of people who are willing to argue with someone over provable facts and what that other person likes or doesn't like is just ... stunning. It's stunning, you guys. Just not in a good way.

I Know What I Like


My wife and I once argued over whether or not I liked mustard on my hot dog. I was for me liking mustard, she was against me liking mustard.

The argument lasted way longer that you could ever imagine it would.

- AardvarkAndy

A Stair Step

My brother and I argued if our staircase had 13 or 14 steps, based on an argument about if the floor of the second floor counts as a stair-step or not. We still have no solution.

- RazerWolf04

My dad is a stairbuilder and I spent many summers working at his warehouse, so I can clear this up. 14.

- Apples9308


My husband and I have this thing where we only say "I love you" on Saturdays. Every other day it's "I love you, but only on Saturdays." I don't know how it started, but it's been going for 11 years now.

We're both shiftworkers, so sometimes we have to stop and think what day it actually is. We had an argument recently over whether it was Saturday or not. I said it was Saturday, he said it was Friday. It was Monday.

- FormalMango


I remember when I was about 13 my parents had an hour-long shouting match that ended with them almost getting divorced. The issue? Whether or not the nation of Iraq has a coastline.

My mother arguing that Iraq had a coastline, while my stepdad argued that it did not. This was back in 2004, and they are still quite happily married to this day. That incident is something they look back on and laugh about, and both of them admit it was really a pretty stupid thing to argue over.

- dontcryformegiratina


With an ex:

"I owe you $80 for the bills of ours that you pay, and you owe me $40 for the bills of ours that I paid. Here's $40 in cash; we're even."

She did not understand this.

I literally had to go get another $40 out of the ATM, and hand the $80 to her. Then I had her hand me the $40 she owed me.

"Now how much do you have in your hand?"

She still didn't understand.

She somehow has a college degree.

- Speedly

Mini Wheats

When we were kids my brother and I got in a physical fight because he said I like mini wheats and I insisted I didn't. His argument was that I always sang the mini wheats song and I was deeply offended that he wasn't aware that it was just stuck in my head but I hated the cereal. I actually did like the cereal I'm not sure why I was arguing with him about it but I remember how genuinely angry I was.

- shicole3



I'll tell you about the only legal trouble I've ever been in, the fight that got me arrested. It started over whether we should return a box of crayons or not, and to this day I don't have any idea how it escalated to the point of the cops being called, but they were and I was the one taken in.

- CorrectionalChard

That's Unfair

My boyfriend insisted that when two people are in an argument and one makes a point so reasonable and logical the other one can't disagree with it - it's unfair. I tried, logically and reasonably, to explain several times why that is just winning the argument, proving your point thoroughly and is completely fair.

His answer was that I was being unfair.

- ShyAcorn

Pure Masochism

How the ch in masochism is pronounced. My friend caught me saying "masoKism" while he would say "masoSYism."

To be fair, he grew up speaking French, in which the ch in masochism is pronounced in "his" way. But he insisted that I was the wrong one here and that was just infuriating.

- argofire

Emailing NASA

A woman was adamant that looking at the big solar eclipse on the television was unsafe unless you were wearing glasses. She wouldn't believe us and insisted on emailing NASA to check.

- derawin07

A Non-Standard Ruler? 

I worked for a company that made signs. We had a customer ask for signs that were 7mm wide that were to go on a door. Our sign makers figured the order meant inches because 7mm is pretty small, so made them 7 inches. I got a phone call from the customer who went mad at me for making them the wrong size. So I put a reorder through for 7 mm.

Argued with the sign makers over it but they eventually agreed to do it after I shown them the order in writing. I even had the customer put her complaint in writing, reiterating the size they wanted.

7mm signs went out and a day later I get the customer on the phone literally screaming at me.

Cue the dumb argument - we ended up having an argument over how big a millimetre is, and obviously everyone in the office were laughing, but this customer just wouldn't accept it and said we must be using a non-standard ruler to measure.

Ended up being escalating to the sales department manager who refused to issue a refund. We still don't know what they actually meant.

- Lovelocke

This Unusual Vegan Argument

Was in a pub with a few friends, and some random Dude dropped an ear, and somehow figured I'm vegan. Well, people like him are the reason I usually avoid mentioning it. He came up to me and insisted on starting a discussion about veganism. He claimed that by the end of it, I would be eating meat again.

He listed some stupid arguments, I told him I was not convinced and then tried to keep on drinking beer with my friends. He followed me, and wanted me to "try to convert him to a vegan." I stupidly listed some of my reasons thinking it would make him go away. He told me he still was not convinced, so I was like whatever. Again, I really just wanted to drink beer with my friends.

That dude followed me all night and expected me to try make him vegan. Doesn't matter what I said, and all the reasons that for me are obviously good enough to be vegan. He'd be just like "No, that doesn't convince me, therefore your argument and how you life is stupid."

Didn't matter how often I told him that I honestly don't care; 5 minutes later he would come up to me again "I'm still not vegan, so veganism is stupid, all your arguments were stupid, now give me a good reason to become vegan!" At one point, I was literally yelling at him that I don't give a single flying f about what he eats and why, that it's in no way my responsibility to "turn somebody vegan" and in no way his business what I eat.

Honestly, for that dude, I would have bought a whole ham, just to shove it up his stupid annoying face.

- onlytruebertos

Monty Python

In college my roommate and I argued about a line in Monty Python & the Holy Grail. The scene with the Black Knight where the line "Alright, we'll call it a draw" is uttered. We argued about who said that line, whether it was King Arthur or the Black Knight.

It went on for hours longer than it should have because I was stubborn and refused to admit I was wrong.

- Skrivus

Albert or Arnold


Whether Albert Einstein or Arnold Schwarzenegger would be more useful to have around during a Zombie apocalypse. How on earth would Albert Einstein come in handy!?

- Gerrard1995

Below Sea Level

I live on an island and when you go upland and you look out the sea looks like it's higher than or on the same level as the land. It's just a weird perspective thing because of the horizon. One day some kid says that it's because the island is under sea level.

I'm like wtf bro all of us would be with the fishes. He argues that no that's not true and if I just go upland I'll see. We then spend a good 5 minutes of my time arguing about it until I decided to leave this kid in his stupidity. He even said we shouldn't believe everything adults tell us and sometimes we need to think for ourselves.

This kid was older than me and was going to a good school. Lost my respect for him ever since then.

- -justforclout-


Someone tried to fight with me over how to spell my name.

Now, my name is in a lot of languages with slightly different spellings. I would have accepted any of those spellings, but this one was just... Not even close. It didn't make any logical sense.

An analogous example is if my name was Thomas and someone was insisting it was spelled Tomash. And not just the name Thomas in general, but that me specifically, on my birth certificate, was named Tomash. I know how to spell my own name.

I swear to god, it went on for like an hour.

- TK-DuVeraun

Whales Are Mammals

I was in an online chat room one day, and we were talking about whales. I commented on how whales are mammals and the next thing you know, someone was arguing with me and trying to convince me that a whale was a fish.

- kawaii_psycho451


Stupid microwaves. Having a man child talk down to me about how microwaves work only for him to google it and prove me right. He slept on the sofa that night.

- sun_phobic

Shower Schedule

My friend keeps telling me that the norm is that a person should shower once a week. This has been going on for years. I'm almost convinced he's trolling me.

- LibrarianGovernment

No Balloons For Grandma

My cousin and I argued over a balloon going to Heaven. We were at his big sisters prom send off and he let a balloon go and it went high into the sky.

He then said this balloon will go up past space and go to Heaven and reach grandma (God rest her soul). And I was like no it's not and it's probably not even gonna reach space. Releasing balloons is terrible for the environment and kills/harms so much wildlife.

He got really mad and defensive and started telling me to google it and do my research and I'm like I don't have to google it you idiot. He was mad at me for a good week.

- Dskee02

Spontaneous Dolphin Existence


How dolphins reproduced. It took me a few solid minutes of explaining to her that dolphins have reproductive organs and that they did not just pop into existence. The argument began with her saying she wanted to work with sea creatures.

Personally, I hope she was messing with me cause I lost a little faith in humanity that day.

- thebeststory

Male Chickens

I repeatedly had the argument with a friend over whether roosters were chickens. She was convinced that only the females were chickens (hens). We were 18 at the time.

- bee_zah

Lightning McQueen

Me and my friend were drinking underage, we ended up in an argument of whether lightning McQueen's eyes were blue or green. Somehow throughout the whole thing both of us never thought to straight up google a picture.

- 23071115

But ... Ice Floats

Waiter/Host here.

Woman wanted ice on the bottom of her drink.

Now read that sentence again and try to imagine arguing with that particular brand of stupid.

- FarWoods

Time Zones Exist

Coworker claimed that it was the same time of day and the same season on the whole globe. Had to get 4 coworkers to confirm to him that time zones do in fact exist.

- JustARegularToaster


My brother is colorblind. And he CONSTANTLY tries to correct me on what color things are.

"Hey could you hand me that red _____?"

"that's orange"

"no, it's red"



It is the base of our most common and heated arguments.

- droneb2hive

Andre 2000?


I'm late, but I saw this question and instantly remembered that I was booted from a Facebook group because I called someone out on a lie that was not only bull, but extremely pointless. She was friends with the moderator and they made the case that my argument over such a little lie was more of a problem than the lie itself (though they didn't refer to it as a lie.)

The woman said that she used to babysit for Andre 3000 and that his name was Andre 2000 - but he changed it after the year 2000 had passed. This was so easily disproven it was ridiculous. Their debut album came out in 1994 and he was already going by Andre 3000 at that time.

The argument wasn't a huge long drawn out thing, but the fact that either of us were on Facebook at separate times meant that the responses were over a long period of time so this argument lasted a few days.

It was stupid.

- P1ST0L_Wh1PP3D

Stars Like Our Sun

I was arguing with my grandpa about stars he didn't believe that there are other stars like our sun. Basically he thought there is only the sun, the moon and the earth.


Richard Nixon

I have a degree in history. I mostly focused on nationalism. Wrote a 50 page paper on it and Richard Nixon with around 50 100 sources. Looked at micro film for hours on end. Part of the paper focused on how Nixon being chair of the house committee of Unamerican Activities was used as a powerful weapon to use against political enemies. It also inspired Joe McCarthy. Have had people tell me I was wrong and Nixon was never elected to a position besides the president and Joe McCarthy came before Nixon. I stopped trying to talk history to people.

I also know quite a bit about the history of the Balkans its amazing how many Serbs refuse to believe Tito did anything wrong.

Wrote 100 page paper on nationalism in Israel. Its frustrating to talk about because for some reason a lot of people think Palestinian firing rockets randomly into Israel is ok but if Israel retaliates the people get up in arms over a targeted air strike that kills 3 people.


Balloon to Heaven

My cousin and I argued over a balloon going to Heaven. We were at his big sisters prom send off and he let a balloon go and it went high into the sky. He then said this balloon will go up past space and go to Heaven and reach grandma (God rest her soul). And I was like no it's not and it's probably not even gonna reach space.

And he got really mad and defensive and started telling me to google it and do my research and I'm like I don't have to google it you idiot. He was mad at me for a good week.


Binder Clips

I got into an argument with a co-worker over how we were attaching two pages of a letter together: small binder clips or paper clips.

He felt that paper clips would leave a "dent" in the paper when removed, but binder clips won't. He refused to staple them together. I felt that binder clips would also leave a "dent", so we might as well just use the paper clips.

It ended with him saying: "Do what you want [me], I don't care!" and storming off.



Once got accused of faking being Jewish. Why? I have no clue. We argued over the course of a month, any time I'd bring it up and she heard about it, she'd begin going after me for "faking it".

My mother's side is ethnically Jewish. Grandparents were practicing.




3 friends and I once got into an argument about how to pronounce Nutella. It lasted for about 3-4 months. It was hilarious how serious we took it, it'd get heated but never for real serious.

I think someone even called the company that made it to check, or that may have been for the Cheetos company. We were really bored in high school.


Lingerie Boxes

Late to the party, but there it is.

I'm a manager at a small store. We're only 4 working there, so my team and I grew very close and we joke around a lot. Once during a slow shift, my employee and I had an argument because we were looking at the lingerie boxes, and I thought that two specific boxes had the same woman on it, but she was 100% positive they weren't the same person.

Looking back, I don't know why it was such a big deal to us at the time, but we even called another employee who lives across the street to come and tell us what the heck was up with that. Turns out I was right, and she was pretty salty about it. It was a great night.


Wicked Witch of the West

I almost got into an argument with an old girlfriend over Glinda the good witch from Oz. She insisted that Glinda was manipulating Dorothy to assassinate the Wicked Witch of the West and convince the Wizard to leave to create a political void she could fill.

I conceded the issue when I heard the whole premise because I thought it was too damn stupid to get worked up over.


Keep Your Hands to Yourself

Just the other day I legit got in an argument with my co-workers on why I don't like my butt being grabbed by anyone (I'm a guy). Seriously.

They went on about "I don't mind it. Mike and I do it all the time and we don't care." Yeah, that's nice dude, but I'm not you, and there's something called "Keep your hands to yourself" (which was taught to a good portion of us growing up). Just like how Karen wouldn't like it if I touched her boobs or her grabbing your crotch or frankly ANY area you wouldn't like being grabbed, keep away. In general, you should not be touching me in any areas after I've told you not to several times before.

So unless you're sleeping me or dating me, keep your damn hands off my toosh.



My best friend and I argued over whether or not telekinesis was possible. Her argument was that humans don't yet know what the human brain at 100% usage was capable of, and that telekinesis was inside the possibilities.

I said the brain does use 100%, just at different times.

We didn't speak to each other for four days.



How dolphins reproduced and whether or not ghost existed (back to back with the same person). It took me a few solid minutes of explaining to her that dolphins have reproductive organs and that they did not just pop into existence (the argument began with her saying she wanted to work with sea creatures).

How it shifted to the existence of ghosts is a solid and reasonable question to ask (I don't remember why). I had to then proceed to tell her that ghost hunting TV shows do not constitute as undeniable evidence.

Personally, I hope she was messing with me cause I lost a little faith in humanity that day. This was in high school SO... hopefully she was kidding.


Dogs and Chocolate


I told this stupid woman that chocolate is toxic to dogs. She went on to tell me how a little bit will just make them hyper and then they will calm down. I told her to google it. Her and her bf shut right up. Now they have a kid. Good luck, Jeremy and Andrea. morons.

I should also add that this argument started because Jeremy was giving his tiny dog chocolate and I told him it was toxic.


Is water wet?

My roommate and I have a recurring argument over whether or not water is wet l, and whether or not a person is considered wet underwater.

For the record, it is no to both questions.


Mission Trip

A kid a church telling me about the mission trip I went on. Not only was I not on that trip, but I had never been on any mission trip. We were good friends, so it's not like he would've mistaken someone else for me.

He insisted I was there as if an entire week long trip would just fall out of my memory. He even had stories of things we'd done together. I'm not sure if he thought I was lying, joking, stupid, or crazy, but I was pretty sure he was some combination thereof.


Dragon Tales

One time I got into a shouting match with my mom and little brother in the car. The issue? The names of the two-headed dragon from the PBS kids afternoon show Dragon Tales. I swore it was Zack and Macie.

It was actually Zak and Wheezie. I don't even remember why we were yelling about it.


Green Or Yellow?

When I was about 15 or so my mother and I spent about 20-30 minutes arguing about the color of a shirt. We agreed it was blue/green, but to me it was just a shade more blue, while to her it was just a bit more green.

Turns out, your eyeballs yellow as you age and hers were 24 years yellower than mine, so I think that skewed her color vision.


Stars In Their Multitude


I once got in an argument over whether or not a line from the song "Stars" in Les Mis says "...but mine is the way of the lord" or "mine is the way of the law".

I didn't even really care what he thought but he was so adamant and cocky that it got me heated. By the end of it we were shouting at each other and I had to apologize, which I think is what he wanted the whole time.



My brother is colorblind. And he CONSTANTLY tries to correct me on what color things are.

"Hey could you hand me that red _____?" "that's orange" "no, it's red" "orange" "YOU CANT EVEN KNOW".

It is the base of our most common and heated arguments.


Hot Water

About five years ago, my girlfriend (now wife) once had a very intense argument about whether or not hot water cleaned things better than cold water.

She genuinely believed that water temperature didn't matter. This is someone who has not one, but two masters degrees.

We argued for something like 2 hours, and we seriously almost broke up over the whole thing.


Biology Class

I had an argument with a girl IN THE MIDDLE OF A BIOLOGY CLASS in high school about how humans are not mammals. She thought a human was a human and we are not mammals because "mammals are animals and humans are not animals"

I tried explaining to her the difference between reptiles and mammals and how humans fall under the mammal category to try and educate her... but she just wouldn't listen.

I still have no idea why the BIOLOGY teacher did not get involved...


Solid Or Liquid?

Some classmates and I got into a heated debate as to whether or not the human body could count as a soup, salad, or sandwich. The teacher got mad at us, but hey! All we were doing was watching a movie.

For the record, my logic lays with soup- Liquid contained within a solid, at a hot temperature.