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People Share The Worst Excuses They've Gotten From A Cheating Ex

You're not serious are you?

Love is complicated. It's not like the movies. It's more like a Taylor Swift song or an Adele album. That's why they're so popular! Relationships can be difficult to navigate, especially if one partner can't pass strangers without falling into a bed. What's better is the excuses one uses for cheating. People are shocking.

Redditor u/sirkeylord was dying to know... What's the worst excuse you've heard for cheating?


What else?

My favorite: "the only reason I didn't cheat on you the last 3 months was because the job I had didn't give me an opportunity."

Another favorite: "well, I gave her a ride home and she didn't have cash, what else was I supposed to do?" Hilarious_83

Well, what else was he supposed to do? NOT cheat!? Don't be ridiculous. MattNemo

Written in the Stars... 

My ex was very into astrology. She cheated and later blamed the great American eclipse of August 2017. SaltyStrength

Was she a fire bender and lost her powers or something? grantchart

Pig!

"My wife was pregnant, so I wasn't getting any." my_future_wife

Ironic considering the best sex I ever had was with a pregnant girl. 10/10 would do again. Sporaticeratic

Whack!

Ex girlfriend cheated when I fell asleep. . . said "since I wasn't responding, she assumed I was doing the same, so she cheated." Whack. drusey3

Well yeah, people who cheat assume everyone else is cheating. She was probably being honest when she said that. carnivoreinyeg

Well if you didn't have fun... 

"I didn't even enjoy it because I was thinking about you the whole time and I felt terrible." btallredi

Have heard a variation of this. It made the situation worse because not only was he claiming to be thinking of me throughout the whole thing, but then ALSO making the decision to continue. Like halfway through, "Wait what about my partner.... naaaaah imma keep goin." nice_ghosty

Damn Tinder... 

"I'm just on tinder to confirm that there's nothing better out there. It helps me appreciate you more." pdxcranberry

I created a fake tinder profile so my wife and I could see what it was all about - we met long before tinder was a thing. While scrolling through, we came across my brother's girlfriend's profile.

Fortunately though, she'd just forgotten to delete her profile. Thehotnesszn

Excuse me?

College roommate would cheat on his girlfriend a few times a semester, then feel awful about it and realize how much he loved his girlfriend.

He started to rationalize that "you need to cheat to stay faithful." Sully1102

No Tarts for you! 

A friend in college cheated on his girlfriend because she told him he had to stop eating pop tarts to lose weight, and he didn't know how to break up with her. When she found out, he straight up told her to her face he couldn't give up pop tarts. I wish that was a lie, those things are high as hell in calories. Krunzuku

The Spirits told me to. 

My buddy's dad was diagnosed with Colon cancer. He starts going to chemo and his wife starts going out with some other guy. His sister found out his mom was cheating on his dad so she told my buddy and he sat his dad down and talked to him.

Dad confronts cheating mom and she says (paraphrasing) "my fortune teller told me that the best way to get over your death would be to start something new with someone else."

Now mind you, his dad is not dead, or really even close. The cancer is responding well to chemo, and he's been slowly getting better. She literally tried justifying cheating on him because he might die....

She no longer lives in the house, and she, best to my knowledge, has been ex-communicated from the family. Reddit

How touching...

"It's not like it meant anything." Oh good, glad we cleared that up. Maxmoose800

Same. That actually made it worse to me. Like damn, if you would've been madly in love with him and just couldn't restrain your emotions, I mean I would still hate you but at least it would've been better than "I don't have to care about someone to f**k them even though you and I are together" haha. Nickbotic

REDDIT

Laws should always protect the people, ALL the people!

Laws are amiable. We know this. They often change with the times, with enough revolution that is. Laws are there to protect and serve, however they can be too complex and just downright odd and often absurd.

Redditor u/AshSpergers wanted to discuss the rules from around the world that may not make the most sense by wondering.... What's a stupid law where you live?

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