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Single People Reveal Their Tinder Date Horror Story

You should have seen what they said...

Tinder, the popular social dating app that simplifies the massively complex world of human interaction to swiping left/right, can lead to successful relationships. It appears more commonly, now, that many couples got their start on Tinder. However, the trope of the "Tinder Horror Story" exists for a reason. Meeting people who aren't what you thought or who harass your inbox are a very real thing.


Reddit user, u/me_llamo_greg, wanted to know about the worst ones you had when they asked:

What is your Tinder horror story?

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Jumping A Few Hurdles At Once

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Went on a date with a girl who had already told her whole family about me, before we even met. And she wanted me to meet them in person on the first date.

Nope.

WolfofPortland

Rotten Seeds Lead To Rotten Plants

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This was back when tinder first came out and wasn't quite as known as a hookup app. We met and had a great first date. Second date was even better. Things kept going for about 2 months when she told me she went out with me originally in an attempt for a Dinner with Schmucks type thing where her and all her friends would bring the worst Tinder date. We both really liked each other, but I couldn't get over how we started.

whywontyouwork

A Living Nightmare

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My roommate loves it, and she's brought back numerous visitors. Which is fine, except for the fact that the apartment is tiny and we share a room. And also the fact that my roommate doesn't really care what I end up seeing. And, as it turns out, most guys don't care about having another girl in the room either--some take it as an opportunity for a for a threesome.

My roommate is my tinder nightmare.

[deleted]

"Wait...who are you?"

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This happened a couple of years back. Just recently moved to Perth Australia from the UK. New friend pointed me towards Tinder for meeting girls. Started speaking to this girl, Short, White, Red head who was a geek, like me. Hitting it off really well, after about 2 weeks of talking she was comfortable enough with me that she wanted to meet. We arrange to meet at a Bar in Perth City. I arrive first, find a table and text her to see if she would like a drink. I purchase the drinks and wait, she is running late.

15 mins later an middle age Asian lady sits down at the table and introduces herself as the girl I have been talking to. Puzzled by this turn of events, I show her the picture of the girl I thought I was talking to. She looks at the picture, then at me and goes yes that's me and starts talking about how nice it is to finally met. Being British, I don't like to make a fuss, I nod and smile.

.

I talk awkwardly for a couple of minutes while trying to find the ring tone select on my phone. I press it and pretend to call from a friend in need of help. Say my apologies and run to the train.

Later that night I thought, It may have been a joke or a test. We never spoke again.

Gazz_mann

Green Light Of Doom

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I was recently on holiday and decided I would jump on Tinder to suss out the local talent. I matched with this guy who seemed pretty attractive and we talked for a few days and discussed catching up for drinks which never eventuated. Towards the end of my trip I chatted to him briefly and he explained he was going away the following day but I was more than welcome to come over to his apartment.

Despite having apprehensions about going to a complete strangers apartment in a foreign country, I decided to go. Nevertheless everything seemed smooth when I arrived at his house. He was charming, good looking and talkative. We got talking and one thing lead to another and before I knew it we were making out on his lounge.

Things escalated rather quickly and got hot and heavy and I decided that this was okay as I was on holiday and would never have to see this guy again. Whilst things were in the heat of the moment I looked at his laptop which was located 3 metres from where the activities were taking place and realised the green light for video recording was on.

To say the least things came to a sudden end and the police were nearly involved. I've decided to take a sabbatical from Tinder for the meantime.

nosceteipsum9

This Is My...Sister?

So I exchange hilarious texts with a Tinder match for a few weeks before we have a chance to get together...We meet at a pub, and after a few minutes the waitress walks up and enthusiastically greets the guy. They exchange pleasantries, then she turns to me and with a look of horror on her face, exclaims: "You're not 'Jane'!!" and turns back to him to ask "Where's Jane? What's going on?". To which he replies "We're not together anymore", and the waitress proceeds to launch into a long series of "omigosh that's so sad...you guys were so good together...I really thought you guys were happy...what happened?"...

He lets her carry on indefinitely and when she's finished, he introduces me as his sister. I think that was supposed to be a joke, but felt like it could have been a sort of cover up, too...not sure...

So she finally takes our order and leaves us to chat. Sadly, there were no more 'jokes' being cracked and the conversation was really heavy, like he thinks the world is past the point of repair and we should all just "etch and sketch" shake it clean and peace out...

On my way home, I thought I should at least give him one more date because I'm trying to be a bit more mature about these things and people get nervous on first dates, etc...He texts that night and the next morning to tell me he had a great time...Then suddenly it's radio silence and I don't hear from him for a few days, and then he's back cracking funny jokes and then out again...Finally get a text saying 'I didn't feel a connection...you're a bright soul...wish you my best...'

Sooo relieved I didn't have to follow through on my mature thought to give him another chance:)...my spidey senses say he's back together with 'Jane' and that I was used as some kind of jealousy-making bait...

somesister

Gone, Girl

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My buddy isn't the smartest man. He picked a chick up and drove to a motel. They were walking into the room and she says, "I forgot my purse in the car do you mind if I go grab it?" He says, "yeah that's fine," and tosses her the keys. 5 minutes later he walks outside wondering where she is and his car is gone.

pointyn-pples69

A Date With The Police

I went on a tinder date with a guy who took me to his favorite smoke spot by a lake.

So we smoke I'm a little sketched out but he promises that he smokes here all the time and never sees any cops. Sure enough, a few minutes later a cop car comes driving by, the officer smells it, and long story short we both get arrested.

I never spoke to him again

qaied

When The Science Is Off

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I went on a date with a guy and the entire time he was talking about how men are superior and how there have been scientific studies to show that "women have an emotional reaction to the color red when they see it". I wonder why he was single.

ilovedawgs

Video Response

Had a great first date, she was fun and easy to talk to and she said she had a really great time and wanted to see me again.

A few days later she sends me a snapchat video of her making out with another guy while flipping her middle finger to the camera.

No idea why, no explanation.

joshublansky

When The Problem Isn't The Person

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I dated someone I met from tinder for a month. Seemed good on paper: masters student, yoga teacher, cultured, etc.

Found out she was doing heroin and didn't consider that a big problem. I actually had to explain to her the definition of a high functioning addict because she felt that having a job and going to school meant the heroin thing wasn't a problem. We broke up and she went back to her junky ex-bf.

Bullet dodged.

PM_ME_A_SULTRY_LOOK

At Least They Were Honest With Us

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Dinner date in Fort McMurray:

She told me "knives are sexy" which I was kinda ok with.

Nope'd out when she got black out drunk over dinner and told me to murder her and bury her in the forest.

Edit: Ok, we dated for 2 years. But then I nope'd out.

ProximusPylon

Mixing Business And Pleasure

Mine is a little late, and not too scandalous, but I had a guy facilitate a drug deal on a Tinder date. We were at a bar, he excused himself outside (for a cigarette, I thought...), was gone for a while, so, I went out and there he was, chatting with some random dude about drugs. Went on for about two hours before actual contact info and drugs were exchanged. Really awkward and nightmarish.

kdblue

An Unnecessary Deep Dive

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There was this guy, he was a solid 10 in his pictures. He messages me, asks me if I want to meet up for coffee, so I say yes. He messages me and tells me that I have to pick him up... Okay whatever, I'll do it. I pick him up, and we decided to go eat instead, he's super funny and cute so we hangout some more after dinner. Then he pulls out his phone and proceeds to tell me that he has a son and his baby momma took of to Washington (but has no idea what part or anything) with him and he hasn't seen him in months. So he then takes out his phone and tells me to go through a folder on his phone of pictures of his son.

Like 300 of them.

He sat there and made me look through every single one, and he would tell me the back story to basically every single video and photo in that folder. I felt so bad, but man I was happy when he left. That whole date just got so weird after that, he did some more stuff but those are good stories for another time lol

Savannahsusername

Don't Let Anything...Linger...

I am a girl so I was always afraid to meet up with people on Tinder because I was worried of my safety. But I finally had the guts to meet the guy who I had been talking to. We will call him *Tyler. So before I met Tyler we talked on the phone and FaceTime just so I knew he wasn't some axe murderer. I met him right before Christmas break so he came to my campus and we got a bite to eat.

When he came everything was good I gave him a tour of my sorority house. Then we went to the place on campus to eat. After that we went back to the house and watched Band of Brothers in the living room. We ended up cuddling and watching the TV series. As we were watching B.O.B. this weird smell popped up and in my head I was like "what is that smell? Maybe he smokes." So I shook it off and tried to not let the smell bother me and then it got worse and I realized it was him. I was like how in the world are you going to meet a girl and not shower.

Right before he left we did share a kiss it was kind of awkward because he picked me up and put my back against the front door of the house. In my head I was like "dude we don't have to make out on the front porch WTF" I pulled away we said our goodbyes and he said he wants to see me again, I said "okay" then he left.

After that I kind of stopped talking to him because I was really turned off that he didn't smell good and had poor hygiene. After he left I showered for the longest time. Even I made sure I showered and smelt good before we met up. So if you ever decide to meet up with someone make sure you shower and take care of your hygiene. No one wants to cuddle or be with someone who smells. And I love a guy who smell amazing... its a turn on.

katieamelia

That Must Have Been A Great Pretzel

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I invited a guy to my favorite place, the zoo. It was going well but shortly after arriving, he ate a pretzel and almost bit his tongue off.

He began bleeding for the next couple of hours (YES HOURS) and spitting out blood. I looked at it and half of his tongue was swollen and puffy. It looked horrible. He then "tried" to eat a hamburger and his eyes just displayed the pain. He tried to kiss me multiple times but my ninja a-- dodged the mess he had going on. Great sport.. But it didn't work out

A-cats

"Dating is too confusing. I'm all done."

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Showed up to the restaurant, waited about 30 minutes. Ordered myself some food and was about to leave when he texted me: "there's a liquor store across the street from the restaurant, can you pick me up 2 six packs?"

I told him I wouldn't. He says he's decided to play frisbee with his dog instead. Deleted app, went to liquor store, picked up wine and went home.

He texted me for a month or so after to tell me he's just bought tickets to see me dance (I'm a retired ballerina, haven't been in anything for a few years). Then he texts me an hour after and tells me how great I was on stage. I never responded.

Dating is too confusing. I'm all done.

buttermuseum

A Night In The Hospital

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My tinder story involves 3days in hospital u/ketsiamalela10h. So i moved to Maryland about 5 months ago. Im originally from South Africa. I'm on a cultural exchange program. Moving here and not knowing anyone isn't fun. I joined tinder in hopes of meeting people (guys) being shown around and all that Jazz. I mean i had nothing to lose right?! Anyways so I went on a whole bunch of dates. Some were good, some okay and some not so fun.

So one Saturday night i had plans but some guy on tinder sent me a message asking if I wanted to hangout. I declined but said I'd like to hangout the following week Friday. That following week Friday I forgot to text him. That Saturday night with nothing planned he came to mind. (Lets call him Dave) so I texted Dave on tinder and said "wanna hangout" he said "sure" we made plans and I drove to his place.

Parked outside his house in DC and from there we took a walk to a wine bar. He was awesome, it was comfortable, conversation was flowing. It was fun. My schedule on Tuesdays and Wednesdays pretty much had me free all day. So we made plans to meet up on either of those days because he was able to hang then. See he owned his own company which allowed him to work from home as long as he had his phone nearby. So the next Tuesday we met up, I drove to his place again. Only this time I couldn't park on the street because it was midday and I didn't have a permit.

He said I should park my car at the back of his place but that it would be tricky for me to and I should let him do it. So I did. Next day I showed up again. I drove up to the back, I called him while outside and waited for him to park my car again. He did. Later on we took my car and drove to go buy snacks because we decided we were gonna watch a movie. We come back from the store. I pull up to the parking spot, get out the car so he could take my seat and park the car. I then wait near the parking spot close to the fence and face the opposite direction of the car.

I heard a loud tire sound and all of a sudden this force (The car) backs up into me and pins me to the fence. I'm freaking out, I scream for him to stop. I'm now stuck with this car on me screaming "Somebody help me please" over and over. He comes out the car and says "I'm so sorry my shoe got stuck on the accelerator" He tries to lift the car to free me, with no success. Then he gets help from some guys that were close by. 3 guys lift the car off me while he accelerates to move it forward. I remember sayin something about the exhaust pipe burning.

Anyways the car is off me. He carries me and layed me down on the table outside. I'm freaking out, adrenalin levels are sky high. My elbow was busted open i had no clue. 911 gets called and from then on began a very painful hospital stay. I had to share this experience because I don't really have anyone to share it with.

But I'm happy to be Alive.

ketsiamalela

Sometimes, Just Awful...

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Matched with my cousin.

DonsMagic

And Sometimes, The Terror Isn't What You Think

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My Tinder nightmare began on Jan 8 2014 when I started texting with a beautiful woman who I knew was out of my league. I'm a 50'ish Caucasian guy, out of shape, overweight, but otherwise stable and normal. She was a 30 year old Black woman, college educated, stunningly beautiful and very elegant and slender. Nonetheless, after a few days of texting I invited her to join me for dinner at a very nice restaurant downtown.

To my dismay she actually accepted my invitation. I was waiting for her at the bar and when she walked in my jaw hit the floor. She was so beautiful I literally lost my breath for a moment. She was taller than me in her heels and was wearing a beautiful short dress with the most amazing legs I had ever seen. She greeted me with a bright smile and a gentle hug and we were escorted to our table. We had a very good date, the conversation flowed, and she seemed to have a good time as well. We decided to continue the date and went to a couple of bars for drinks. Finally she said it was time to go home and, since she had taken Uber earlier, I offered to give her a ride home and she quickly agreed.

All this time I thought that, even though the date was fun, and comfortable, I assumed it would possibly lead to a friendship at best considering the obvious differences. Well when we got to her place we talked for a few minutes more. I offered to walk her to her door but she declined. She then got out and walked around to my door. She leaned through the window and planted a very brief but sensual kiss on my lips. My heart stopped! She then leaned back and smiled. I was able to stammer out an invitation to go out again and she accepted without hesitation. I was on cloud nine! I knew that this remarkable woman would have a profound affect on my life, it seemed pre-destined.

Fast forward a couple of weeks, She and I had been seeing each other nearly every day and I was developing strong feelings already. But, something was wrong. I had a weird nagging sense that she was hiding something. Although she was being very affectionate , something just felt off. Then finally it happened. We were out at a bar together. It was a good time but she seemed distracted. As we were leaving she turned to me and said, in a serious tone, "we need to talk". I thought, this is it, the differences between us are too much for her and I'm about to be friend zoned. But nothing prepared me for what came next.

She asked me to just listen and not say anything, and I agreed. She then started out by saying that she had developed strong feelings for me but there was something that I needed to know about her that might make me want to change my mind about pursuing a relationship. My mind was spinning and so many scenarios raced through my head. Is she married? Is she a criminal? Then I remembered a few day earlier when we were making out and I touched her breast lightly and realized that she had breast implants because it was quite hard. So I thought, is she a trans?

But, as it turns out, she wasn't but that would have been better than what came next. She looked at me, and with a tear in her eye, she told me that she has stage 4 breast cancer. She was originally diagnosed 4 years earlier as stage 3 and had beaten it back into remission after having a double mastectomy along with radiation treatment and chemotherapy. Now it had returned as stage 4 and she was to start chemo again in two weeks. I was floored! She then stated that she will understand if I wanted to turn and run and she wouldn't think less of me for it.

My response was to re-iterate that I adored her. And I thought she was an amazing woman and if she wanted me to take this journey with her that I would be honored to do so. We kissed and just held each other for a while. Finally she said goodnight and went to her car to go home. I cried all the way home. We had a full amazing year together. I had to go to Japan for work and she met me there in between chemo treatments. She never cried and was always elegant. I learned what the true definition of grace meant. We lived a lifetime in 2014. She died 9 months ago, 15 months after we met. I am a much better man for having met her and shared in her struggle. I love you and miss you so much Genny!

mr-contrarian

A salad? In front of my burrito?

En route to the Worst Date Ever, this guy texted me from the burrito place we were meeting, to tell me he'd already ordered me the salad. I repeat: SALAD. At a burrito place. Also, was this the past? Was I now incapable of placing my own food order? Anyway… After arriving – with my salad ready, beside his plate of tacos – he spent the next half an hour telling me about his model ex-girlfriend and how passionate their 'breakup sex' had been…last weekend. The final straw was – even after telling him I wasn't a big fan of smoking – he literally asked a stranger for cigarettes and then chain smoked them beside me.

HarveyGonzales

Way Way Way late to the party apparently, but i feel obliged to share my best friends story. He /u/philosofuel (i think was his username) died recently at age 23 from a massive seizure in his sleep. - but he loved to tell this story, so i'll tell it here, so at least if i ever forget it i know at least I can find it.

So this philosofuel is a shy guy, timid, a bit neurotic, dates are hard to come by for him but when he's on them, he's nice and charming and fairly handsome (i'll give him that) so he doesnt do too bad once he's got a shot.

Anyway, all us lads are on tinder at this stage and we all have the philosophy always swipe (whichever way is) YES so you get maximum matches and take it from there. Now there is this one girl who looks a bit rough, a bit unkept i'll say and her description read: "I love giving BJs"

Now philosofuel was a very compassionate guy and talked to literally everyone he matched with and gave everyone at least one date, he didnt match with many but bless him he dated them all (including his gf up until his death - may she never read this). He travels on a train to date this girl at her house. He recounted that from being picked up at the train station the car was full of litter, the footwell was 90% litter, 10% his feet. And the woman from the photo, she had aged, not too kindly, either. And the house was run down, dirty, every room doubling as a bedroom for some cavedweller from that part of town.

After a while of small talk and awkward experience she asked him if he wanted a bj, assuring him she was really good at these. He finds a spot on the bed among the rubbish. cup of chamomile in hand - his only refuge of cleanliness.

Man the way he described it was a very funny and less like he's repulsed.

AlexDerLion

The usual.

One time I messaged a girl.

She didn't message me back...

pezosa

Try reading this without gagging.

Matched with a guy and we messaged back and forth a few days before meeting up at a concert. I actually had a great time, thought he was really cute, and definitely was feeling good about the whole thing. He was about 9 years older than me, but a very clean cut looking guy, total gentleman, and a chef at a local higher-end restaurant. He invited me back to his place after the show, and I agreed because...well, I liked the guy! Since he lived pretty close to the venue I told him I'd just follow him back. That's when he said he didn't own a car, or drive (apparently he walked there).

That didn't seem like a huge red flag at first so I gave him a ride back to his place and ended up going inside with him. He casually mentioned on the way up the steps to his apartment that he didn't expect company so he apologized for not cleaning up better. Yeah, sure, that's something we all say because we left a dish in the sink by accident, right? No big. But I was not prepared for what I was about to walk into.

..

The front door opened into his kitchen where there were HEAPS on garbage and dirty dishes covering the table, the counters, and the sink. There was also dirty laundry strewn all around on the floor. Piles of it. I'm talking hoarder style. The only light was coming from the hallway behind me but I could already tell I'd made a huge mistake. It reeked like cat piss and rotting food. As he ushered me hurriedly through the kitchen to his bedroom I found out my nightmare was only just beginning. He flipped on the light switch to his room and...I sh*t you not...I saw the cockroaches scatter. Well, some of them anyway. The others didn't care and swarmed around his cat's food bowl which he'd left sitting in the middle of the floor (poor animal).

The place was a goddamn pig sty. Trash and everything just strewn about. He told me to have a seat on his bed, aka a mattress on the floor completely covered in cat hair. As I did, this guy just goes for it! He whips his shirt right off to reveal pierced nipples and the worst gigantic tribal chest piece tattoo. It looks almost like he drew it on with a sharpie, but I can tell it's real. Now, I have tattoos and piercings myself, but for some reason his just made me want to vomit. I'm too grossed out to even set my purse on the floor and so I'm sitting there clutching it tightly to my chest.

He puts some movie on before sitting down next to me and he starts trying to make moves. At this point I'm looking for an escape plan and FAST. I apologize, tell him some bullshit about being tired and work in the morning and I book it the hell out of there. He continued to text me and call me a couple times but he did actually get the hint fairly quickly.

I later found out through the grapevine that apparently that guy had been fired from him previous job for breaking in and attempting to steal all the liquor during a snow storm. The kicker is I ran into him a few months later at another concert where he was drunkenly dancing alone up at the front before knocking over a microphone stand. Then he came up and introduced himself to my boyfriend in a very, "oh you MUST have heard about me" kind of way. Truly one of the most bizarre human beings I'd ever met and a real tinder nightmare.

TLDR : Met a cool guy, so I thought. Went back to his place. Dude had a nasty roach problem and nipple piercings.

catscratchvintage

Classic.

I had been talking to this girl on Tinder for a while and we decide we wanted to smash. The problem is I had asked my roommate if I could have the room later. (Apparently, unlike the rest of the animals you people seem to have as roommates.) So when I went to sign this girl in, we have a proctor in the lobby at my universities dorms, my roommate and several other friends of mine placed a Bluetooth speaker in my room and hid in the hallway, waiting for me to get back.

I didn't see them and things started to get hot and heavy when, "Let's Get It On" started playing from somewhere in the room. I started searching and after 5 minutes,while the song "I just had sex" was finishing playing, I found the Bluetooth speaker under my roommates bed behind his dresser. Yes I had to move both of them. I found the power button but not before the wonderful sound of hardcore pornography filled the room. The two of us decided to call it so we threw on some clothes I walked her past all six of the basterds.... I never saw her again.

Comic-Derpinator

Uhhh, what?

Met this girl on tinder, invited her into bed. She accepts, comes over, we have fantastic sex, a lot. Same thing the next night. Thing is, she's moving to Montana in a few weeks for a job. A cook position in a national park. She invites me out there, I look into the job and eventually get it. We decide to start dating (met twice, known her for a month, I'm an idiot) to keep it exclusive at adult summer camp there in Montana. I get out there, she freaks out and breaks up with me because she has cancer, cancels the breakup, does it again the next night, I agree and say it's over. Proceeds to cock block me constantly throughout the summer and we scream at each other in the kitchen. Poor choices all around.

Clamamity

Ghosting on a really awful level.

This didn't actually come about through Tinder, but rather through an equivalent app. So, I meet the guy there and he's just incredible. Clever, good-looking, funny... You get the type. The only catch is that he doesn't live in my city. After a couple of weeks of messaging and phone calls, we decide to meet up and we settle on that I would be going to him because I'd never been to his city and that seemed like a fun little adventure. Right? WRONG.

The big day comes and I embark on the 2.5-hour train journey and I get all excited and I can't wait to get off the train - and then he's not at the platform when I get off. Try to call him to no avail and after four hours of waiting, I decide to take the next train back home. Haven't heard from him since.

TL;DR: Met a guy from a different city relatively far away. Stands me up when I go out there to meet him.

JulieStrike2991

Ouch.

I don't really have a horror story, since I've gotten about one date out of tinder which went alright. But I've been rejected plenty, the highlight of which was this girl, who seemed pretty interesting and was reasonably attractive, so I swiped right. And it turned out that we matched. Hooray. So, I send her a message. Something clever, along the lines of "Hey, a match, did we just become best friends?!" Though, I can't take credit for that one, I did steal that from Reddit/step brothers. Happily, she responded rather promptly, so I was eager to read what she'd sent, cause for the most part women just kinda ignore me. Anyway, I open it up and all it said was "I swiped the wrong way."

hoeraufist

This could not have gone better.

Matched with a girl, and she was quite pretty in the face. All of her pictures were mostly of just her face/upper body, but I didn't pay any mind. She initiated the conversation, and she was immediately in to hooking up, so of course I invited her over. She gets there and I answer the door, and turns out she was about 6'5". I am 5'8" on a good day. I let out an audible "Holy Shit" and she picked me up and carried me to the bedroom like a baby. No regrets.

MacJabroniAndCheese

Creepy.

ADVICE WELCOME!! So I went on three dates with this dude and we hooked up the last time at his house. Things end with the typical fade away, I was fine with it. We weren't very compatible and I noticed a few minor red flags.

6 months later he starts emailing me, obviously looking for a reenactment of our summer fling. When I turned down his advances, he sends me a screen shot of myself, in his bedroom, while we were hooking up, half a year ago.

So obviously this douche nozzle filmed us without my consent. I reported it to the police and now, almost a year after I filed the report, I have to testify against the creep. I have no legal rep except the state's "victim advocate" who only seems to have experience with DV cases.

[deleted]

When he's actually an underage virgin.

Happened a year ago. Met this guy. Similar interests, looked great in his pictures. We decided to meet up on a Sunday for lunch. I was so hungover from a friend's Christmas party that I threw up upon arrival. He didn't seem to mind. He didn't order a drink and I couldn't order one due to the hangover. Once the hangover subsided, I suggested we walk around and head into a bar. He doesn't like the first bar, had a "bad experience" at the next bar, and keeps on passing on them. Until we finally get to his favorite bar.

He orders drinks, and after a few more drinks I suggest heading to a wine bar. He passes, because he confesses that he's only 20. And while his profile said he worked at a local college, it was a work study position, because he is a junior there. Maybe it was the hangover, maybe it was the exhaustion, but I still brought him home. Things occurred, and I found out he was a virgin. He ran away in tears and threw up on my apartment stairs. Repeated the process once he was 21, and it was almost the same situation. Never again.

jabberwocky_

Yeesh.

We talked for a couple of hours, drank some wine, watched a movie and we had sex. Then things went a little downhill... We layed in bed and suddenly it looked like she was about to black out so I helped her sit right up and asked if I could help her, get her some water and stuff. But she didn't speak a word. She just sat there with her her hands in her hair for a couple of minutes and then puked all over my sheets. At this point I wanted to get her to the shower asap but she was just stunned or something. I didn't know what to do.

After a couple minutes I finally convinced her to get up and brought her to the shower so she could clean herself while I could clean the sheets and all that. Every 5 min I checked on her if she was okay but she would just sit on the floor with the shower running and wouldn't talk. It was all very awkward. After 20 min or so I brought her a towel and some clothes and we sat on the edge of my bed and she told me that she was born without a womb. She cried, i calmed her down and we finally went to sleep (without a blanket or sheets, i didn't have spare ones in my studentapartment) the next day i made breakfast and she went home. Weirdest "date" I ever had.

mosscow

She sounds like a keeper.

I matched this pretty cute looking girl. She didn't look like she was in super great shape but she didn't look obese or anything. Well, we exchange numbers and I called her. She agreed to come over to my house so I waited outside while she found her way over. She pulls up in a super bad*ss car so I'm like hell yeah. When she gets out, it looked like her suspension let out a sigh of relief. She was at least 300 pounds. Nice girl though, she gave me a back massage then I told her I was tired afterwards and she left.

Ben_Shanklin

I'm a little late to the party but my first Tinder date has been my most eventful date ever.

So I matched this absolutely drop-dead gorgeous girl, way out of my league, and we arrange to meet in the city for a few drinks on a Friday evening. We meet in this little bar and share a drink, the conversation is a lot of small talk to begin with but it's flowing well. Anyway we're there for about 30 minutes when she says she hasn't eaten anything yet and asks if I wanna grab a bite to eat. I do, so we finish our drinks and start moving outside to find some food.

When the crazed ex intervenes.

As we're walking along the sidewalk I see this guy in front of me staring me down. Like he is proper shooting daggers at me and making me super uncomfortable. I try to ignore him, look at the ground, look at the girl, whatever... we move to pass him and he spins around on his heel and SLAMS me into a wall. He has is forearm pressed up against my neck and is pushing so hard my feet are starting to lift off the ground. I try and pull his arm away from my throat, unsuccessfully, and my vision is starting to go black.

I thought I was done for here.

In a last-ditch effort to not be strangled to death, I used the wall as a board to push my knee up into him as hard as I can. I hit him square in the groin and he relinquishes his grip... my vision starts to return, although it's giving me a splitting headache. I splutter and try and get my breath back a bit while i watch this guy curl over, red in the face with veins popping out of his forehead. He stumbles over to the street and throws up all through the gutter. I turn to the girl who's just watching all of this like a roo in headlights.

.

Turns out, the guy was her ex-boyfriend who heard about our date through a mutual friend of theirs. I manage to wheeze out enough to ask her if she'd like to get another drink with me, as I could really use one. She declines and says she's just going to get a ride home, and practically sprints away from whatever the hell this situation was.

I ended up leaving this other guy puking in the street and stayed out for a few hours by myself. Had a really good night in the end, met a bunch of new people and a pretty fun story (in hindsight).

Avatar-Wan

Nope.

Went out with a girl, and had a great time together. I only knew her first name. We were texting later that night after our date and I told her to add me on Snapchat and gave her my username. She added me and up popped a request from FirstnameLastname. Her Lastname being my mom's VERY RARE maiden name. She was my second cousin.

We clarified things briefly and never spoke again.

snoop37

You can't hide...

Friend saw my girlfriend (now ex) on Tinder. He was a bro and told me. Nightmare at the time but I'm glad I found out.

andysaurus_rex

Reasons we are still single...

Bots, scammers and girls that don't respond to messages after we match. Overall it is a delightful waste of time.

-Megrim-

Trading news and then never speaking again is the new way to date.

Met a girl a week back, she was a little iffy about me being in an open relationship, so she stops chatting. Resumes again a few days later and we're talking about meeting up. We exchange numbers and text a bit. She occasionally pushes the conversation sexually without much build up, I go with it, it stops. Repeat. Including a few naked pictures (noice) and I send some back (they're well-regarded). On Friday we decide to hang out Sunday. Saturday we're texting a bit at night and it's gonna be so f on.

Sunday morning I send a text to see what's up, she says come play. I'm pumped and ask her where I'm heading. The end. No more texts, no messages on Tinder, nothing. I send a few "hello?" texts her way and get nothing. I hope she's OK and just got cold feet. I hope this mainly because she's a fellow human but also partially because if something bad and mysterious happened to her and the police go through her phone, I'll be suspect numero uno.

TheJoePilato

H/T: Reddit

Have you ever found yourself in an argument so stupid and/or pointless that you were sure you were being punked? Like you keep looking away from the other person to check your surroundings for places Ashton Kutcher and a camera crew could come popping out of?

You're not the only one.

u/Anti-hollowkid asked: What is the dumbest argument you've ever been in?

Brace yourselves, folks. Some of these arguments are breathtakingly bonkers. The sheer number of people who are willing to argue with someone over provable facts and what that other person likes or doesn't like is just ... stunning. It's stunning, you guys. Just not in a good way.

I Know What I Like

Giphy

My wife and I once argued over whether or not I liked mustard on my hot dog. I was for me liking mustard, she was against me liking mustard.

The argument lasted way longer that you could ever imagine it would.

- AardvarkAndy

A Stair Step

My brother and I argued if our staircase had 13 or 14 steps, based on an argument about if the floor of the second floor counts as a stair-step or not. We still have no solution.

- RazerWolf04

My dad is a stairbuilder and I spent many summers working at his warehouse, so I can clear this up. 14.

- Apples9308

Saturdays

My husband and I have this thing where we only say "I love you" on Saturdays. Every other day it's "I love you, but only on Saturdays." I don't know how it started, but it's been going for 11 years now.

We're both shiftworkers, so sometimes we have to stop and think what day it actually is. We had an argument recently over whether it was Saturday or not. I said it was Saturday, he said it was Friday. It was Monday.

- FormalMango

Iraq

I remember when I was about 13 my parents had an hour-long shouting match that ended with them almost getting divorced. The issue? Whether or not the nation of Iraq has a coastline.

My mother arguing that Iraq had a coastline, while my stepdad argued that it did not. This was back in 2004, and they are still quite happily married to this day. That incident is something they look back on and laugh about, and both of them admit it was really a pretty stupid thing to argue over.

- dontcryformegiratina

$40

With an ex:

"I owe you $80 for the bills of ours that you pay, and you owe me $40 for the bills of ours that I paid. Here's $40 in cash; we're even."

She did not understand this.

I literally had to go get another $40 out of the ATM, and hand the $80 to her. Then I had her hand me the $40 she owed me.

"Now how much do you have in your hand?"

She still didn't understand.

She somehow has a college degree.

- Speedly

Mini Wheats

When we were kids my brother and I got in a physical fight because he said I like mini wheats and I insisted I didn't. His argument was that I always sang the mini wheats song and I was deeply offended that he wasn't aware that it was just stuck in my head but I hated the cereal. I actually did like the cereal I'm not sure why I was arguing with him about it but I remember how genuinely angry I was.

- shicole3

Crayons

Giphy

I'll tell you about the only legal trouble I've ever been in, the fight that got me arrested. It started over whether we should return a box of crayons or not, and to this day I don't have any idea how it escalated to the point of the cops being called, but they were and I was the one taken in.

- CorrectionalChard

That's Unfair

My boyfriend insisted that when two people are in an argument and one makes a point so reasonable and logical the other one can't disagree with it - it's unfair. I tried, logically and reasonably, to explain several times why that is just winning the argument, proving your point thoroughly and is completely fair.

His answer was that I was being unfair.

- ShyAcorn

Pure Masochism

How the ch in masochism is pronounced. My friend caught me saying "masoKism" while he would say "masoSYism."

To be fair, he grew up speaking French, in which the ch in masochism is pronounced in "his" way. But he insisted that I was the wrong one here and that was just infuriating.

- argofire

Emailing NASA

A woman was adamant that looking at the big solar eclipse on the television was unsafe unless you were wearing glasses. She wouldn't believe us and insisted on emailing NASA to check.

- derawin07

A Non-Standard Ruler? 

I worked for a company that made signs. We had a customer ask for signs that were 7mm wide that were to go on a door. Our sign makers figured the order meant inches because 7mm is pretty small, so made them 7 inches. I got a phone call from the customer who went mad at me for making them the wrong size. So I put a reorder through for 7 mm.

Argued with the sign makers over it but they eventually agreed to do it after I shown them the order in writing. I even had the customer put her complaint in writing, reiterating the size they wanted.

7mm signs went out and a day later I get the customer on the phone literally screaming at me.

Cue the dumb argument - we ended up having an argument over how big a millimetre is, and obviously everyone in the office were laughing, but this customer just wouldn't accept it and said we must be using a non-standard ruler to measure.

Ended up being escalating to the sales department manager who refused to issue a refund. We still don't know what they actually meant.

- Lovelocke

This Unusual Vegan Argument

Was in a pub with a few friends, and some random Dude dropped an ear, and somehow figured I'm vegan. Well, people like him are the reason I usually avoid mentioning it. He came up to me and insisted on starting a discussion about veganism. He claimed that by the end of it, I would be eating meat again.

He listed some stupid arguments, I told him I was not convinced and then tried to keep on drinking beer with my friends. He followed me, and wanted me to "try to convert him to a vegan." I stupidly listed some of my reasons thinking it would make him go away. He told me he still was not convinced, so I was like whatever. Again, I really just wanted to drink beer with my friends.

That dude followed me all night and expected me to try make him vegan. Doesn't matter what I said, and all the reasons that for me are obviously good enough to be vegan. He'd be just like "No, that doesn't convince me, therefore your argument and how you life is stupid."

Didn't matter how often I told him that I honestly don't care; 5 minutes later he would come up to me again "I'm still not vegan, so veganism is stupid, all your arguments were stupid, now give me a good reason to become vegan!" At one point, I was literally yelling at him that I don't give a single flying f about what he eats and why, that it's in no way my responsibility to "turn somebody vegan" and in no way his business what I eat.

Honestly, for that dude, I would have bought a whole ham, just to shove it up his stupid annoying face.

- onlytruebertos

Monty Python

In college my roommate and I argued about a line in Monty Python & the Holy Grail. The scene with the Black Knight where the line "Alright, we'll call it a draw" is uttered. We argued about who said that line, whether it was King Arthur or the Black Knight.

It went on for hours longer than it should have because I was stubborn and refused to admit I was wrong.

- Skrivus

Albert or Arnold

Giphy

Whether Albert Einstein or Arnold Schwarzenegger would be more useful to have around during a Zombie apocalypse. How on earth would Albert Einstein come in handy!?

- Gerrard1995

Below Sea Level

I live on an island and when you go upland and you look out the sea looks like it's higher than or on the same level as the land. It's just a weird perspective thing because of the horizon. One day some kid says that it's because the island is under sea level.


I'm like wtf bro all of us would be with the fishes. He argues that no that's not true and if I just go upland I'll see. We then spend a good 5 minutes of my time arguing about it until I decided to leave this kid in his stupidity. He even said we shouldn't believe everything adults tell us and sometimes we need to think for ourselves.

This kid was older than me and was going to a good school. Lost my respect for him ever since then.

- -justforclout-

Tomash

Someone tried to fight with me over how to spell my name.

Now, my name is in a lot of languages with slightly different spellings. I would have accepted any of those spellings, but this one was just... Not even close. It didn't make any logical sense.


An analogous example is if my name was Thomas and someone was insisting it was spelled Tomash. And not just the name Thomas in general, but that me specifically, on my birth certificate, was named Tomash. I know how to spell my own name.

I swear to god, it went on for like an hour.

- TK-DuVeraun

Whales Are Mammals

I was in an online chat room one day, and we were talking about whales. I commented on how whales are mammals and the next thing you know, someone was arguing with me and trying to convince me that a whale was a fish.

- kawaii_psycho451

Microwaves

Stupid microwaves. Having a man child talk down to me about how microwaves work only for him to google it and prove me right. He slept on the sofa that night.

- sun_phobic

Shower Schedule

My friend keeps telling me that the norm is that a person should shower once a week. This has been going on for years. I'm almost convinced he's trolling me.

- LibrarianGovernment

No Balloons For Grandma

My cousin and I argued over a balloon going to Heaven. We were at his big sisters prom send off and he let a balloon go and it went high into the sky.

He then said this balloon will go up past space and go to Heaven and reach grandma (God rest her soul). And I was like no it's not and it's probably not even gonna reach space. Releasing balloons is terrible for the environment and kills/harms so much wildlife.

He got really mad and defensive and started telling me to google it and do my research and I'm like I don't have to google it you idiot. He was mad at me for a good week.

- Dskee02

Spontaneous Dolphin Existence

Giphy

How dolphins reproduced. It took me a few solid minutes of explaining to her that dolphins have reproductive organs and that they did not just pop into existence. The argument began with her saying she wanted to work with sea creatures.

Personally, I hope she was messing with me cause I lost a little faith in humanity that day.

- thebeststory

Male Chickens

I repeatedly had the argument with a friend over whether roosters were chickens. She was convinced that only the females were chickens (hens). We were 18 at the time.

- bee_zah

Lightning McQueen

Me and my friend were drinking underage, we ended up in an argument of whether lightning McQueen's eyes were blue or green. Somehow throughout the whole thing both of us never thought to straight up google a picture.

- 23071115

But ... Ice Floats

Waiter/Host here.

Woman wanted ice on the bottom of her drink.

Now read that sentence again and try to imagine arguing with that particular brand of stupid.

- FarWoods

Time Zones Exist

Coworker claimed that it was the same time of day and the same season on the whole globe. Had to get 4 coworkers to confirm to him that time zones do in fact exist.

- JustARegularToaster

Colorblind

My brother is colorblind. And he CONSTANTLY tries to correct me on what color things are.

"Hey could you hand me that red _____?"

"that's orange"

"no, it's red"

"orange"

"YOU CANT EVEN KNOW"

It is the base of our most common and heated arguments.

- droneb2hive

Andre 2000?

Giphy

I'm late, but I saw this question and instantly remembered that I was booted from a Facebook group because I called someone out on a lie that was not only bull, but extremely pointless. She was friends with the moderator and they made the case that my argument over such a little lie was more of a problem than the lie itself (though they didn't refer to it as a lie.)


The woman said that she used to babysit for Andre 3000 and that his name was Andre 2000 - but he changed it after the year 2000 had passed. This was so easily disproven it was ridiculous. Their debut album came out in 1994 and he was already going by Andre 3000 at that time.

The argument wasn't a huge long drawn out thing, but the fact that either of us were on Facebook at separate times meant that the responses were over a long period of time so this argument lasted a few days.

It was stupid.

- P1ST0L_Wh1PP3D

Stars Like Our Sun

I was arguing with my grandpa about stars he didn't believe that there are other stars like our sun. Basically he thought there is only the sun, the moon and the earth.

fox_boi2

Richard Nixon

I have a degree in history. I mostly focused on nationalism. Wrote a 50 page paper on it and Richard Nixon with around 50 100 sources. Looked at micro film for hours on end. Part of the paper focused on how Nixon being chair of the house committee of Unamerican Activities was used as a powerful weapon to use against political enemies. It also inspired Joe McCarthy. Have had people tell me I was wrong and Nixon was never elected to a position besides the president and Joe McCarthy came before Nixon. I stopped trying to talk history to people.


I also know quite a bit about the history of the Balkans its amazing how many Serbs refuse to believe Tito did anything wrong.

Wrote 100 page paper on nationalism in Israel. Its frustrating to talk about because for some reason a lot of people think Palestinian firing rockets randomly into Israel is ok but if Israel retaliates the people get up in arms over a targeted air strike that kills 3 people.

grumblecakes1

Balloon to Heaven

My cousin and I argued over a balloon going to Heaven. We were at his big sisters prom send off and he let a balloon go and it went high into the sky. He then said this balloon will go up past space and go to Heaven and reach grandma (God rest her soul). And I was like no it's not and it's probably not even gonna reach space.

And he got really mad and defensive and started telling me to google it and do my research and I'm like I don't have to google it you idiot. He was mad at me for a good week.

Dskee02

Binder Clips

I got into an argument with a co-worker over how we were attaching two pages of a letter together: small binder clips or paper clips.

He felt that paper clips would leave a "dent" in the paper when removed, but binder clips won't. He refused to staple them together. I felt that binder clips would also leave a "dent", so we might as well just use the paper clips.

It ended with him saying: "Do what you want [me], I don't care!" and storming off.

justantherredditgirl

Jewish

Once got accused of faking being Jewish. Why? I have no clue. We argued over the course of a month, any time I'd bring it up and she heard about it, she'd begin going after me for "faking it".

My mother's side is ethnically Jewish. Grandparents were practicing.

Aslkurloz

Nutella

Giphy

3 friends and I once got into an argument about how to pronounce Nutella. It lasted for about 3-4 months. It was hilarious how serious we took it, it'd get heated but never for real serious.

I think someone even called the company that made it to check, or that may have been for the Cheetos company. We were really bored in high school.

vault_tec_redditor

Lingerie Boxes

Late to the party, but there it is.

I'm a manager at a small store. We're only 4 working there, so my team and I grew very close and we joke around a lot. Once during a slow shift, my employee and I had an argument because we were looking at the lingerie boxes, and I thought that two specific boxes had the same woman on it, but she was 100% positive they weren't the same person.

Looking back, I don't know why it was such a big deal to us at the time, but we even called another employee who lives across the street to come and tell us what the heck was up with that. Turns out I was right, and she was pretty salty about it. It was a great night.

Meh75

Wicked Witch of the West

I almost got into an argument with an old girlfriend over Glinda the good witch from Oz. She insisted that Glinda was manipulating Dorothy to assassinate the Wicked Witch of the West and convince the Wizard to leave to create a political void she could fill.

I conceded the issue when I heard the whole premise because I thought it was too damn stupid to get worked up over.

weirdatwork2017

Keep Your Hands to Yourself

Just the other day I legit got in an argument with my co-workers on why I don't like my butt being grabbed by anyone (I'm a guy). Seriously.

They went on about "I don't mind it. Mike and I do it all the time and we don't care." Yeah, that's nice dude, but I'm not you, and there's something called "Keep your hands to yourself" (which was taught to a good portion of us growing up). Just like how Karen wouldn't like it if I touched her boobs or her grabbing your crotch or frankly ANY area you wouldn't like being grabbed, keep away. In general, you should not be touching me in any areas after I've told you not to several times before.

So unless you're sleeping me or dating me, keep your damn hands off my toosh.

Frisby2007

Telekinesis

My best friend and I argued over whether or not telekinesis was possible. Her argument was that humans don't yet know what the human brain at 100% usage was capable of, and that telekinesis was inside the possibilities.

I said the brain does use 100%, just at different times.

We didn't speak to each other for four days.

dude_bizarro

Ghosts

How dolphins reproduced and whether or not ghost existed (back to back with the same person). It took me a few solid minutes of explaining to her that dolphins have reproductive organs and that they did not just pop into existence (the argument began with her saying she wanted to work with sea creatures).


How it shifted to the existence of ghosts is a solid and reasonable question to ask (I don't remember why). I had to then proceed to tell her that ghost hunting TV shows do not constitute as undeniable evidence.

Personally, I hope she was messing with me cause I lost a little faith in humanity that day. This was in high school SO... hopefully she was kidding.

thebeststory

Dogs and Chocolate

Giphy

I told this stupid woman that chocolate is toxic to dogs. She went on to tell me how a little bit will just make them hyper and then they will calm down. I told her to google it. Her and her bf shut right up. Now they have a kid. Good luck, Jeremy and Andrea. morons.

I should also add that this argument started because Jeremy was giving his tiny dog chocolate and I told him it was toxic.

KlutzyHedgehog

Is water wet?

My roommate and I have a recurring argument over whether or not water is wet l, and whether or not a person is considered wet underwater.

For the record, it is no to both questions.

SFCopperhead

Mission Trip

A kid a church telling me about the mission trip I went on. Not only was I not on that trip, but I had never been on any mission trip. We were good friends, so it's not like he would've mistaken someone else for me.

He insisted I was there as if an entire week long trip would just fall out of my memory. He even had stories of things we'd done together. I'm not sure if he thought I was lying, joking, stupid, or crazy, but I was pretty sure he was some combination thereof.

SirRogers

Dragon Tales

One time I got into a shouting match with my mom and little brother in the car. The issue? The names of the two-headed dragon from the PBS kids afternoon show Dragon Tales. I swore it was Zack and Macie.

It was actually Zak and Wheezie. I don't even remember why we were yelling about it.

MistalQueensglaive

Green Or Yellow?

When I was about 15 or so my mother and I spent about 20-30 minutes arguing about the color of a shirt. We agreed it was blue/green, but to me it was just a shade more blue, while to her it was just a bit more green.

Turns out, your eyeballs yellow as you age and hers were 24 years yellower than mine, so I think that skewed her color vision.

BugsRatty

Stars In Their Multitude

Giphy

I once got in an argument over whether or not a line from the song "Stars" in Les Mis says "...but mine is the way of the lord" or "mine is the way of the law".

I didn't even really care what he thought but he was so adamant and cocky that it got me heated. By the end of it we were shouting at each other and I had to apologize, which I think is what he wanted the whole time.

theedjman

Colorblind

My brother is colorblind. And he CONSTANTLY tries to correct me on what color things are.

"Hey could you hand me that red _____?" "that's orange" "no, it's red" "orange" "YOU CANT EVEN KNOW".

It is the base of our most common and heated arguments.

droneb2hive

Hot Water

About five years ago, my girlfriend (now wife) once had a very intense argument about whether or not hot water cleaned things better than cold water.

She genuinely believed that water temperature didn't matter. This is someone who has not one, but two masters degrees.

We argued for something like 2 hours, and we seriously almost broke up over the whole thing.

moniker5000

Biology Class

I had an argument with a girl IN THE MIDDLE OF A BIOLOGY CLASS in high school about how humans are not mammals. She thought a human was a human and we are not mammals because "mammals are animals and humans are not animals"

I tried explaining to her the difference between reptiles and mammals and how humans fall under the mammal category to try and educate her... but she just wouldn't listen.

I still have no idea why the BIOLOGY teacher did not get involved...

10d4plus8

Solid Or Liquid?

Some classmates and I got into a heated debate as to whether or not the human body could count as a soup, salad, or sandwich. The teacher got mad at us, but hey! All we were doing was watching a movie.

For the record, my logic lays with soup- Liquid contained within a solid, at a hot temperature.

ScreamingPotoo