IRL

Uber Drivers Reveal The Most Bizarre Passenger They've Ever Given a Ride To

Don't hold out for a good rating.

Being a driver is not an easy job and it certainly isn't a safe job. People be crazy. A lot of the time we as passengers are nervous about getting into the car of a stranger but imagine the nerves of the drivers, they are in contact with strangers (who could be complete whackos) consistently for hours on end. We've all seen the videos of passengers gone crazy on a loop. If I was a driver, I'd own stock in mace.

Redditor u/foosh124 wanted the Uber drivers out there tell us a few tales regarding their most "unique" passengers by asking.... Uber drivers of Reddit; what's the creepiest, weirdest, and/or most bizarre passenger experience you've had?


Nothing good happens at 3am....

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3am. Drive up to an old bar. Guy and his friend get in and immediately start laughing. I don't question because I figured they were drunk, and from the smell, stoned too. About half way to their destination, the guy's friend asked me for my wallet because he left his driver's license in it. I started laughing because that's the stupidest thing I ever heard. My friend a few months prior bought a new wallet and left his old one in the my car, so I put a single dollar in it and handed it to him. He hopped out of the car and ran a few feet away before saying "What the hell? 1 dollar? You're broke as hell!" idiotOnAnApp

Waffle House Stories....

Picked up a girl at a motel and she was going to another motel (sex worker) she said she wanted me to pull up to the room and she'd give me $10 to wait 5 minutes. If she came up within 5 minutes we'd leave and go somewhere else.

Said she was nervous about this John. She gives me $10, goes in. Comes out like 2 minutes later and asks me to take her to a waffle house. She offered me a $20 tip and asked me if I wanted to eat with her.

I said sure since it was like 4 AM and the night was dying down anyway. Left her at the waffle house and went home. Had some interesting stories. sting2018

Switching Partners....

Was driving an afternoon in the late summer. I live in a beach town so it was perfect weather and people everywhere. Went to a pick up and saw a guy and two women. Picked them up and they clearly had been day drinking, just laughing and having a good time.

It was a husband and wife and the wife's cousin. They all were clearly sexed up a little from the booze, joking about having sex (the husband and wife). The guy makes a joke to his wife's cousin saying "if I had met you first we'd be married."

Then the wife said to the cousin, "if you weren't my cousin I'd let you join in when we get home." The guy and the cousin starting laughing their a**es off, and the guy said to the cousin, "I wouldn't mind if you didn't." They all laughed like crazy until I got to their house a few blocks away.

This was only maybe a 5 minute drive. Between the fare and tip I made about $7. Was definitely worth it, I'll gladly drive them again if I see them this summer. martorano10

I Am Shooketh!

This is from a few months ago - still gives me shakes.....

Went to pick up an Austin in NJ. It was about 2am, so it's my last ride. He's a little far out, but not awful (I'm pretty rural anyway). I meet him at his spot near the woods and he's in some sort of gown. Almost like a graduation gown, but it wasn't black. He then waves and four kids (around ten?) come out in solid white with another person in a gown just like his and they all climb in.

They are all silent other than Austin, who is giving a monologue on the importance of some animal they were with. After about ten minutes, I look back, and I shit you not, every single kid was glaring at me in my rear view mirror.

All. Frickin. Four. Immediately Austin asks to halt the ride and asks for a new drop off, about two minutes away. Pretty confident the other gent in the gown was staring at me too, but I couldn't see his eyes. I tremble and ask him to update the app. He says he won't, as it's a discrete location. I'm shivering and do that trick where you call a friend and let them listen in. I get to the location and they all pile out, except for that Austin guy, who looks at me dead in the eyes, then at my upside-down phone, then back at my eyes. He then got out and went into the woods.

Wtf man. rubidium-custard-37

Use protection kids....

I once picked up two kids from a Jewish high school on a Wednesday night. They spent the first half of the ride talking about colleges and where they were going to go. Then it got quiet and I was treated to the ambient sounds of face sucking and UNDER THE PANTS STUFF.

Then they had the self-awareness to get out of the car at the end saying thank you and CLEARLY thought they got away with it. I gagged and wiped down the backseat just in case. penisinthepeanutbttr

The Family....

Just for a positive weird one, ended up becoming a close family friend to three generations of an immigrant family. Grandpa was the only one to order a ride through Uber proper, enjoyed talking to me and decided he'd rather just pay cash to have me come get him to run errands. Not that weird of a request and it was Summer in a college town, not a bad deal.

He was there hashing out details for his daughter/granddaughter about to move to town, figured (correctly) I'd get along well with his daughter who didn't know anyone in the area. Arranged it so I'd get them to/from the airport for cash whenever one flew in, and over time he was right. Friends with her now, dude's wife loves talking to me to/from the airport, and even the little granddaughter asks about me if she hasn't seen me for a while. Drove for about a year, and that's the most interesting story I have from it for sure. rougepenguin

Crazy you are....

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About a year ago a guy got into my car and just started saying, "I have the high ground! I have the high ground! deep voice General Kenobi! You are a bold one!*"

And I don't even drive Uber or a rideshare haha... OGGreenRanger69

Crazy Ladies....

I woke the dead with AC/DC's It's a Long Way to the Top (If You Wanna Rock and Roll).

St. Patrick's Day, I get a bunch of drunk college ladies in my car. The three in back are cheerful drunks, chatting and laughing. The one riding next to me is motionless. For the first 20 minutes of the trip, this woman doesn't move a muscle. Her phone is on on her lap, but she isn't looking at it or touching the screen at all. Having had similar situations before, my concern was that she would revive in a spontaneous shower of vomit.

Instead, as we're heading into the downtown tunnel, the aforementioned song pops up on my playlist. Dr. Frankenstein would have killed for the resulting resurrection. The previously motionless young lady gasps loudly, shoots forward in her seat, and eagerly asks me to turn it up. I nearly drove into the wall of the tunnel. The rest of the trip was spent telling me how she was a huge fan of Jack Black, and how she recognized the song from School of Rock. CosmicMuse

Hitting the slots....

Not really creepy or weird but definitely unexpected and a bit bizarre at the time. Three older women paid me to take them an hour ride to a casino and then by the hour to hang out and give them a safe ride once they were done gambling. I was in school at the time and one of the ladies ended up helping me restructure my resume and this Monday I'll be starting me new job as a Data Engineer. EitherChipmunk

I am Tracy!

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Pulled up to a hotel and women came to my window. And I said you Tracy she said yeah I am. I said are you going to such and such address and she is like no I'm not going there. Then another women comes to my window knocking on it and says I'm Tracy. I said oh well who the hell is this other lady? Ended up driving the real Tracy to her destination and then dropped off the stranger where she wanted to go for 20 cash. So basically picked up and drove a stranger. Overall bad decision. bassetd892

Paws Up! 

Drove for a bit a few years ago and one night I picked up a dude and his buddy around a popular bar area who were pretty drunk. They were going back to a rich part of town so I took the ride hoping for a nice tip. They started talking crap close to home and when we got there they started beating the crap out of each other in the driveway as they got out of the car. I left pretty quick. sglville

Get thee to Mckidees! 

So I had a few weeks off between jobs a few years ago so I decided to try Uber. The worst experience was at 3am I picked up 2 couples from the stretch of bars downtown after some big country concert. The guys were super nice, the one in the front seat even had the same 1st name as me and we were chatting. Turns out that the guys met the girls at the bar and they were all heading back to the girls hotel. About halfway through the ride one girl decided she wanted McDonald's and since it was her Uber (it was the guys) I had to take her to McDonald's. The other girl said she didn't want McDonald's and she just wanted to get laid.

They keep arguing and I keep talking to the guy in the front seat until the guy in the backseat tells me I need to pull over. I look back and see the girls fighting in my backseat. I pullover and we get the girls out, somehow they got loose and started fighting again in the middle of the street. I call the cops and by the time the cop got there we have them separated again (McDonald's girl tried to bang her friends head against the concrete).

I tell the cop that it's McDonald's girl that is the aggressor so he goes to arrest her and she starts resisting so I help the cop restrain her. Once we get her in the backseat she starts trying to kick the windows out so we get her back out of the car because the cop wanted to hog tie her. Finally 2 other cops show up and I'm relieved of my duties. She just kept yelling about how she's a lawyer and she wasn't read her Miranda rights.

I turned off the app, took the 2 guys home and never gave another ride. cco87

Give them the Axe!

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I have a passenger story about Uber! This was the middle of the day. We got in, and the car REEKED of weed. The driver started the conversation off by saying how he would never get into a stranger's car, because that is how you get murdered. We laughed and made some jokes, but he continued on and on about how you never know who has an axe in their trunk. We eventually just got quieter and quieter, because he kept bringing up the murder. There were 4 of us, so I wasn't too scared because I figured he wouldn't be able to murder all of us during our 8 minute trip. We arrived safely, and I gave him 0 stars because "the car smelled like weed." I was afraid he would find me and murder me if I told on him for the murder stuff lol. drroftarcdt

I See Evil. 

I took a guy to a nearby town across the river at 3am

When he got out he came to the driver's window and said "Ever see pure evil? I am the reincarnation of Jeffry Dahmer!"

Then he walked away down the dark street. smilingonion

Caio Fool! 

I was the passenger, not the uber driver...

I was in Rome, Italy and I got an uber with a middle aged Italian dude... the whole way through he had his window down and was yelling at every single person walking by... even worse! This mother f***er pulls to the side and has a 15 minute long conversation with a random dude at a sidewalk 20 minutes from my hotel... I finally got back and he didn't say anything... I got my stuff out myself and walked up the long a** slope to my hotel... this mother f***er parks at the very bottom of the slope... I paid him €40 and was pissed for the rest of the day. Timmy_turning

Go Back! 

Picked up a dude and his girlfriend in a well known bar district early evening during the summer. Dude is fine but gf is wasted. I'm talking slurring speech, can't walk, etc. Dude tells me where he's going and I start the trip. As soon as a I take off she says she wants to go back. Dude keeps telling her that they're going home but she keeps saying "go back go back go back." Then she starts saying she doesn't feel well. I tell her that if she feels like she is going to throw up, let me know so I can pull over and let her out. She says pull over so I do. She gets out and then just starts cussing me out for no reason and kicks at my door and the side of the car all while the dude is trying to hold her back. I take off and leave them there. First 1 star review I ever gave a passenger. FearTheKeflex

Sweet Virginia....

I was driving in Virginia Beach late one night and I get a ride that I have to pick up from the busiest bar and intersection on the beach. So I get there, call the guy to let him know he'll have to cross the street because it's shut down for some kind of event. He doesn't answer. We get paid for the time we wait, so I just sit there calling and texting him over and over. After about 25 minutes I ended the ride because it had kicked me out of the waiting screen after a while.

As I'm stopping for gas 20 minutes later, he starts blowing up my phone asking where I am and telling me to come back. He was super drunk and told me it was my fault because he didn't hear his phone ring. I reported it to Lyft since I'm sure it gave him the option to one star me because the ride had technically started. Best part: his destination was over 2 hours away in the middle of a snowy December. He got really aggressive on the phone so it was a little rattling. woolfonmynoggin

Outside the Gates....

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Not me but my dad:

Picked up 2 passengers from a Halloween party after midnight in Hollywood. One wearing a full Batman costume and the other wearing a full Spider-Man costume, masks included. They didn't say a word and just pointed to the GPS on where to take them. The ride went all the way to Palm Springs (2+ hours), not one word.

The entire ride he said was scared for his life. They didn't even put in the address of a house, he just dropped them off on a random side street of a neighborhood. They got out when they arrived, said nothing, tipped $200 and that was the end of it. After thinking about it once they left, his conclusion is that they must have been somewhat famous as he picked them up at a large house in a gated neighborhood and dropped them off outside a gated neighborhood. redditor8239

Little Girl?

I have a female cousin who very briefly drove for Uber and she said one large male passenger smelled her hair by leaning into the front seat, called her "little girl" the whole ride and tried to convince her to change the destination from a bar to the middle of the damn woods.

She no longer drives for Uber. EarnstEgret

Babel.

I picked up a guy who wouldn't stop talking to himself and kept mentioning he had taken a bunch of unknown pills earlier. He wasn't aware of reality at all and would randomly get angry at me, screaming that I should be telling him jokes and entertaining him since I am his driver. When we were almost to his destination, he opened the door and jumped out of my car while it was still moving. Luckily I was near stopping and only going around 5mph when he did. He didn't get hurt. timelizard13

REDDIT

Have you ever found yourself in an argument so stupid and/or pointless that you were sure you were being punked? Like you keep looking away from the other person to check your surroundings for places Ashton Kutcher and a camera crew could come popping out of?

You're not the only one.

u/Anti-hollowkid asked: What is the dumbest argument you've ever been in?

Brace yourselves, folks. Some of these arguments are breathtakingly bonkers. The sheer number of people who are willing to argue with someone over provable facts and what that other person likes or doesn't like is just ... stunning. It's stunning, you guys. Just not in a good way.

I Know What I Like

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My wife and I once argued over whether or not I liked mustard on my hot dog. I was for me liking mustard, she was against me liking mustard.

The argument lasted way longer that you could ever imagine it would.

- AardvarkAndy

A Stair Step

My brother and I argued if our staircase had 13 or 14 steps, based on an argument about if the floor of the second floor counts as a stair-step or not. We still have no solution.

- RazerWolf04

My dad is a stairbuilder and I spent many summers working at his warehouse, so I can clear this up. 14.

- Apples9308

Saturdays

My husband and I have this thing where we only say "I love you" on Saturdays. Every other day it's "I love you, but only on Saturdays." I don't know how it started, but it's been going for 11 years now.

We're both shiftworkers, so sometimes we have to stop and think what day it actually is. We had an argument recently over whether it was Saturday or not. I said it was Saturday, he said it was Friday. It was Monday.

- FormalMango

Iraq

I remember when I was about 13 my parents had an hour-long shouting match that ended with them almost getting divorced. The issue? Whether or not the nation of Iraq has a coastline.

My mother arguing that Iraq had a coastline, while my stepdad argued that it did not. This was back in 2004, and they are still quite happily married to this day. That incident is something they look back on and laugh about, and both of them admit it was really a pretty stupid thing to argue over.

- dontcryformegiratina

$40

With an ex:

"I owe you $80 for the bills of ours that you pay, and you owe me $40 for the bills of ours that I paid. Here's $40 in cash; we're even."

She did not understand this.

I literally had to go get another $40 out of the ATM, and hand the $80 to her. Then I had her hand me the $40 she owed me.

"Now how much do you have in your hand?"

She still didn't understand.

She somehow has a college degree.

- Speedly

Mini Wheats

When we were kids my brother and I got in a physical fight because he said I like mini wheats and I insisted I didn't. His argument was that I always sang the mini wheats song and I was deeply offended that he wasn't aware that it was just stuck in my head but I hated the cereal. I actually did like the cereal I'm not sure why I was arguing with him about it but I remember how genuinely angry I was.

- shicole3

Crayons

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I'll tell you about the only legal trouble I've ever been in, the fight that got me arrested. It started over whether we should return a box of crayons or not, and to this day I don't have any idea how it escalated to the point of the cops being called, but they were and I was the one taken in.

- CorrectionalChard

That's Unfair

My boyfriend insisted that when two people are in an argument and one makes a point so reasonable and logical the other one can't disagree with it - it's unfair. I tried, logically and reasonably, to explain several times why that is just winning the argument, proving your point thoroughly and is completely fair.

His answer was that I was being unfair.

- ShyAcorn

Pure Masochism

How the ch in masochism is pronounced. My friend caught me saying "masoKism" while he would say "masoSYism."

To be fair, he grew up speaking French, in which the ch in masochism is pronounced in "his" way. But he insisted that I was the wrong one here and that was just infuriating.

- argofire

Emailing NASA

A woman was adamant that looking at the big solar eclipse on the television was unsafe unless you were wearing glasses. She wouldn't believe us and insisted on emailing NASA to check.

- derawin07

A Non-Standard Ruler? 

I worked for a company that made signs. We had a customer ask for signs that were 7mm wide that were to go on a door. Our sign makers figured the order meant inches because 7mm is pretty small, so made them 7 inches. I got a phone call from the customer who went mad at me for making them the wrong size. So I put a reorder through for 7 mm.

Argued with the sign makers over it but they eventually agreed to do it after I shown them the order in writing. I even had the customer put her complaint in writing, reiterating the size they wanted.

7mm signs went out and a day later I get the customer on the phone literally screaming at me.

Cue the dumb argument - we ended up having an argument over how big a millimetre is, and obviously everyone in the office were laughing, but this customer just wouldn't accept it and said we must be using a non-standard ruler to measure.

Ended up being escalating to the sales department manager who refused to issue a refund. We still don't know what they actually meant.

- Lovelocke

This Unusual Vegan Argument

Was in a pub with a few friends, and some random Dude dropped an ear, and somehow figured I'm vegan. Well, people like him are the reason I usually avoid mentioning it. He came up to me and insisted on starting a discussion about veganism. He claimed that by the end of it, I would be eating meat again.

He listed some stupid arguments, I told him I was not convinced and then tried to keep on drinking beer with my friends. He followed me, and wanted me to "try to convert him to a vegan." I stupidly listed some of my reasons thinking it would make him go away. He told me he still was not convinced, so I was like whatever. Again, I really just wanted to drink beer with my friends.

That dude followed me all night and expected me to try make him vegan. Doesn't matter what I said, and all the reasons that for me are obviously good enough to be vegan. He'd be just like "No, that doesn't convince me, therefore your argument and how you life is stupid."

Didn't matter how often I told him that I honestly don't care; 5 minutes later he would come up to me again "I'm still not vegan, so veganism is stupid, all your arguments were stupid, now give me a good reason to become vegan!" At one point, I was literally yelling at him that I don't give a single flying f about what he eats and why, that it's in no way my responsibility to "turn somebody vegan" and in no way his business what I eat.

Honestly, for that dude, I would have bought a whole ham, just to shove it up his stupid annoying face.

- onlytruebertos

Monty Python

In college my roommate and I argued about a line in Monty Python & the Holy Grail. The scene with the Black Knight where the line "Alright, we'll call it a draw" is uttered. We argued about who said that line, whether it was King Arthur or the Black Knight.

It went on for hours longer than it should have because I was stubborn and refused to admit I was wrong.

- Skrivus

Albert or Arnold

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Whether Albert Einstein or Arnold Schwarzenegger would be more useful to have around during a Zombie apocalypse. How on earth would Albert Einstein come in handy!?

- Gerrard1995

Below Sea Level

I live on an island and when you go upland and you look out the sea looks like it's higher than or on the same level as the land. It's just a weird perspective thing because of the horizon. One day some kid says that it's because the island is under sea level.


I'm like wtf bro all of us would be with the fishes. He argues that no that's not true and if I just go upland I'll see. We then spend a good 5 minutes of my time arguing about it until I decided to leave this kid in his stupidity. He even said we shouldn't believe everything adults tell us and sometimes we need to think for ourselves.

This kid was older than me and was going to a good school. Lost my respect for him ever since then.

- -justforclout-

Tomash

Someone tried to fight with me over how to spell my name.

Now, my name is in a lot of languages with slightly different spellings. I would have accepted any of those spellings, but this one was just... Not even close. It didn't make any logical sense.


An analogous example is if my name was Thomas and someone was insisting it was spelled Tomash. And not just the name Thomas in general, but that me specifically, on my birth certificate, was named Tomash. I know how to spell my own name.

I swear to god, it went on for like an hour.

- TK-DuVeraun

Whales Are Mammals

I was in an online chat room one day, and we were talking about whales. I commented on how whales are mammals and the next thing you know, someone was arguing with me and trying to convince me that a whale was a fish.

- kawaii_psycho451

Microwaves

Stupid microwaves. Having a man child talk down to me about how microwaves work only for him to google it and prove me right. He slept on the sofa that night.

- sun_phobic

Shower Schedule

My friend keeps telling me that the norm is that a person should shower once a week. This has been going on for years. I'm almost convinced he's trolling me.

- LibrarianGovernment

No Balloons For Grandma

My cousin and I argued over a balloon going to Heaven. We were at his big sisters prom send off and he let a balloon go and it went high into the sky.

He then said this balloon will go up past space and go to Heaven and reach grandma (God rest her soul). And I was like no it's not and it's probably not even gonna reach space. Releasing balloons is terrible for the environment and kills/harms so much wildlife.

He got really mad and defensive and started telling me to google it and do my research and I'm like I don't have to google it you idiot. He was mad at me for a good week.

- Dskee02

Spontaneous Dolphin Existence

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How dolphins reproduced. It took me a few solid minutes of explaining to her that dolphins have reproductive organs and that they did not just pop into existence. The argument began with her saying she wanted to work with sea creatures.

Personally, I hope she was messing with me cause I lost a little faith in humanity that day.

- thebeststory

Male Chickens

I repeatedly had the argument with a friend over whether roosters were chickens. She was convinced that only the females were chickens (hens). We were 18 at the time.

- bee_zah

Lightning McQueen

Me and my friend were drinking underage, we ended up in an argument of whether lightning McQueen's eyes were blue or green. Somehow throughout the whole thing both of us never thought to straight up google a picture.

- 23071115

But ... Ice Floats

Waiter/Host here.

Woman wanted ice on the bottom of her drink.

Now read that sentence again and try to imagine arguing with that particular brand of stupid.

- FarWoods

Time Zones Exist

Coworker claimed that it was the same time of day and the same season on the whole globe. Had to get 4 coworkers to confirm to him that time zones do in fact exist.

- JustARegularToaster

Colorblind

My brother is colorblind. And he CONSTANTLY tries to correct me on what color things are.

"Hey could you hand me that red _____?"

"that's orange"

"no, it's red"

"orange"

"YOU CANT EVEN KNOW"

It is the base of our most common and heated arguments.

- droneb2hive

Andre 2000?

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I'm late, but I saw this question and instantly remembered that I was booted from a Facebook group because I called someone out on a lie that was not only bull, but extremely pointless. She was friends with the moderator and they made the case that my argument over such a little lie was more of a problem than the lie itself (though they didn't refer to it as a lie.)


The woman said that she used to babysit for Andre 3000 and that his name was Andre 2000 - but he changed it after the year 2000 had passed. This was so easily disproven it was ridiculous. Their debut album came out in 1994 and he was already going by Andre 3000 at that time.

The argument wasn't a huge long drawn out thing, but the fact that either of us were on Facebook at separate times meant that the responses were over a long period of time so this argument lasted a few days.

It was stupid.

- P1ST0L_Wh1PP3D

Stars Like Our Sun

I was arguing with my grandpa about stars he didn't believe that there are other stars like our sun. Basically he thought there is only the sun, the moon and the earth.

fox_boi2

Richard Nixon

I have a degree in history. I mostly focused on nationalism. Wrote a 50 page paper on it and Richard Nixon with around 50 100 sources. Looked at micro film for hours on end. Part of the paper focused on how Nixon being chair of the house committee of Unamerican Activities was used as a powerful weapon to use against political enemies. It also inspired Joe McCarthy. Have had people tell me I was wrong and Nixon was never elected to a position besides the president and Joe McCarthy came before Nixon. I stopped trying to talk history to people.


I also know quite a bit about the history of the Balkans its amazing how many Serbs refuse to believe Tito did anything wrong.

Wrote 100 page paper on nationalism in Israel. Its frustrating to talk about because for some reason a lot of people think Palestinian firing rockets randomly into Israel is ok but if Israel retaliates the people get up in arms over a targeted air strike that kills 3 people.

grumblecakes1

Balloon to Heaven

My cousin and I argued over a balloon going to Heaven. We were at his big sisters prom send off and he let a balloon go and it went high into the sky. He then said this balloon will go up past space and go to Heaven and reach grandma (God rest her soul). And I was like no it's not and it's probably not even gonna reach space.

And he got really mad and defensive and started telling me to google it and do my research and I'm like I don't have to google it you idiot. He was mad at me for a good week.

Dskee02

Binder Clips

I got into an argument with a co-worker over how we were attaching two pages of a letter together: small binder clips or paper clips.

He felt that paper clips would leave a "dent" in the paper when removed, but binder clips won't. He refused to staple them together. I felt that binder clips would also leave a "dent", so we might as well just use the paper clips.

It ended with him saying: "Do what you want [me], I don't care!" and storming off.

justantherredditgirl

Jewish

Once got accused of faking being Jewish. Why? I have no clue. We argued over the course of a month, any time I'd bring it up and she heard about it, she'd begin going after me for "faking it".

My mother's side is ethnically Jewish. Grandparents were practicing.

Aslkurloz

Nutella

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3 friends and I once got into an argument about how to pronounce Nutella. It lasted for about 3-4 months. It was hilarious how serious we took it, it'd get heated but never for real serious.

I think someone even called the company that made it to check, or that may have been for the Cheetos company. We were really bored in high school.

vault_tec_redditor

Lingerie Boxes

Late to the party, but there it is.

I'm a manager at a small store. We're only 4 working there, so my team and I grew very close and we joke around a lot. Once during a slow shift, my employee and I had an argument because we were looking at the lingerie boxes, and I thought that two specific boxes had the same woman on it, but she was 100% positive they weren't the same person.

Looking back, I don't know why it was such a big deal to us at the time, but we even called another employee who lives across the street to come and tell us what the heck was up with that. Turns out I was right, and she was pretty salty about it. It was a great night.

Meh75

Wicked Witch of the West

I almost got into an argument with an old girlfriend over Glinda the good witch from Oz. She insisted that Glinda was manipulating Dorothy to assassinate the Wicked Witch of the West and convince the Wizard to leave to create a political void she could fill.

I conceded the issue when I heard the whole premise because I thought it was too damn stupid to get worked up over.

weirdatwork2017

Keep Your Hands to Yourself

Just the other day I legit got in an argument with my co-workers on why I don't like my butt being grabbed by anyone (I'm a guy). Seriously.

They went on about "I don't mind it. Mike and I do it all the time and we don't care." Yeah, that's nice dude, but I'm not you, and there's something called "Keep your hands to yourself" (which was taught to a good portion of us growing up). Just like how Karen wouldn't like it if I touched her boobs or her grabbing your crotch or frankly ANY area you wouldn't like being grabbed, keep away. In general, you should not be touching me in any areas after I've told you not to several times before.

So unless you're sleeping me or dating me, keep your damn hands off my toosh.

Frisby2007

Telekinesis

My best friend and I argued over whether or not telekinesis was possible. Her argument was that humans don't yet know what the human brain at 100% usage was capable of, and that telekinesis was inside the possibilities.

I said the brain does use 100%, just at different times.

We didn't speak to each other for four days.

dude_bizarro

Ghosts

How dolphins reproduced and whether or not ghost existed (back to back with the same person). It took me a few solid minutes of explaining to her that dolphins have reproductive organs and that they did not just pop into existence (the argument began with her saying she wanted to work with sea creatures).


How it shifted to the existence of ghosts is a solid and reasonable question to ask (I don't remember why). I had to then proceed to tell her that ghost hunting TV shows do not constitute as undeniable evidence.

Personally, I hope she was messing with me cause I lost a little faith in humanity that day. This was in high school SO... hopefully she was kidding.

thebeststory

Dogs and Chocolate

Giphy

I told this stupid woman that chocolate is toxic to dogs. She went on to tell me how a little bit will just make them hyper and then they will calm down. I told her to google it. Her and her bf shut right up. Now they have a kid. Good luck, Jeremy and Andrea. morons.

I should also add that this argument started because Jeremy was giving his tiny dog chocolate and I told him it was toxic.

KlutzyHedgehog

Is water wet?

My roommate and I have a recurring argument over whether or not water is wet l, and whether or not a person is considered wet underwater.

For the record, it is no to both questions.

SFCopperhead

Mission Trip

A kid a church telling me about the mission trip I went on. Not only was I not on that trip, but I had never been on any mission trip. We were good friends, so it's not like he would've mistaken someone else for me.

He insisted I was there as if an entire week long trip would just fall out of my memory. He even had stories of things we'd done together. I'm not sure if he thought I was lying, joking, stupid, or crazy, but I was pretty sure he was some combination thereof.

SirRogers

Dragon Tales

One time I got into a shouting match with my mom and little brother in the car. The issue? The names of the two-headed dragon from the PBS kids afternoon show Dragon Tales. I swore it was Zack and Macie.

It was actually Zak and Wheezie. I don't even remember why we were yelling about it.

MistalQueensglaive

Green Or Yellow?

When I was about 15 or so my mother and I spent about 20-30 minutes arguing about the color of a shirt. We agreed it was blue/green, but to me it was just a shade more blue, while to her it was just a bit more green.

Turns out, your eyeballs yellow as you age and hers were 24 years yellower than mine, so I think that skewed her color vision.

BugsRatty

Stars In Their Multitude

Giphy

I once got in an argument over whether or not a line from the song "Stars" in Les Mis says "...but mine is the way of the lord" or "mine is the way of the law".

I didn't even really care what he thought but he was so adamant and cocky that it got me heated. By the end of it we were shouting at each other and I had to apologize, which I think is what he wanted the whole time.

theedjman

Colorblind

My brother is colorblind. And he CONSTANTLY tries to correct me on what color things are.

"Hey could you hand me that red _____?" "that's orange" "no, it's red" "orange" "YOU CANT EVEN KNOW".

It is the base of our most common and heated arguments.

droneb2hive

Hot Water

About five years ago, my girlfriend (now wife) once had a very intense argument about whether or not hot water cleaned things better than cold water.

She genuinely believed that water temperature didn't matter. This is someone who has not one, but two masters degrees.

We argued for something like 2 hours, and we seriously almost broke up over the whole thing.

moniker5000

Biology Class

I had an argument with a girl IN THE MIDDLE OF A BIOLOGY CLASS in high school about how humans are not mammals. She thought a human was a human and we are not mammals because "mammals are animals and humans are not animals"

I tried explaining to her the difference between reptiles and mammals and how humans fall under the mammal category to try and educate her... but she just wouldn't listen.

I still have no idea why the BIOLOGY teacher did not get involved...

10d4plus8

Solid Or Liquid?

Some classmates and I got into a heated debate as to whether or not the human body could count as a soup, salad, or sandwich. The teacher got mad at us, but hey! All we were doing was watching a movie.

For the record, my logic lays with soup- Liquid contained within a solid, at a hot temperature.

ScreamingPotoo